Ridiculous to wrap my own bouquets?

Knottie1430965129 · June 2015

I am one of those people who believes that, within reason, by all means spend the money when it really counts. FI and I are 100% paying for our wedding, with the exception of the rehearsal dinner, which his parents have graciously offered to take care of. However, FI, my FMIL, and I have been bickering about the flowers for the bouquets, boutonnieres, and centerpieces. I have 2 bridesmaids; he has 2 groomsmen; centerpieces will not require flowers at all because they are 12" mirrors with tall white lanterns and a column candle with ribbon (DIY/"not how FMIL did it"); and as far as the alter goes, the venue has a beautiful white arch that, in my opinion, doesn't need further adornment. The ceremony is outside overlooking the Chesapeake Bay and the girls are wearing knee-length dresses in a soft flowing material. They are carrying bright pink Gerber Daisies, and I would like to grow and wrap the bouquets myself. I would also like my bouquet to be somewhat simple, sturdy flowers in pinks and whites. Since there are so many videos and even DIY boutonniere stations at some weddings, I didn't think it would be a big deal to save a little on the flowers since they will all be relatively simple. FI thinks I'm being absolutely ridiculous wanting to do things myself rather than just pay someone to make them, FMIL is against the bride's bouquet having any color other than white, and she insists that it should be cascading. My dress is a semi-custom version of the dress below, with extra embellishment at the gathering of asymmetrical material.

http://www.sinceritybridal.com/wedding_dress/3757 , it's a May wedding, and it's outside. My shoes are bright pink (something else FMIL disagrees with), and I thought the combo of colorful flowers between the bridal party and my bouquet would tie it all together.

I know it's going to be a lot of "you're paying, you get the final say" ... I think I am looking for more reassurance that I'm not crazy for wanting to take on some aspects of our big day in a DIY sense , and mainly if anyone has any input as to if you've done this or know someone who has.

I'm sorry for the long-winded post... I just switched from "finish nursing school" mode to "our wedding is in less than 1 year" mode. Thanks in advance for any advice!

[Deleted User] · June 2015

I would buy some flowers before hand and practice doing this if you've never arranged or wrapped flowers before. They may be right simply because this isn't a skill you have... if you do- great, go for it.

I'd also have a back up plan if you're growing these yourself; mother nature can be fickle.

ETF: typo

Maggie0829 · June 2015

Your FMIL can want all day, but since she is not paying for it then you don't have to listen to her.

I would rethink growing your own flowers though. Flowers don't always bloom when you want them to. And what happens if they bloom too early or too late? What if they don't bloom at all? What if an insect finds them yummy? I would suggest, if you truly want to do this yourself, looking at ordering flowers in bulk. I know there have been brides on here who have ordered through Costco or Sams Club and other wholesale flower markets.

But really what you want doesn't sound very complex or involved so I would go to a florist or two just to see what they may quote you to do some bouquets and bouts. You may be surprised at how inexpensive it may be. I would weigh the cost of hiring a florist to do it against the time it is going to take you to make up the flowers including processing the flowers in, keeping them in a cool area, working with them most likely the day prior if not the morning of your wedding.

I am all for DIY things when it comes to weddings, but I personally would have hated having to worry about such an aspect the days leading up to and possibly the day of my wedding. That last week I had a bunch of little things to get done, a lot of running around and the last thing I would have wanted was another DIY project to do.

justsie · June 2015

I agree with other PP's. Growing the flowers yourself is a big risk, so make sure to have a backup plan. You could also ask the florist if they wouldn't mind incorporating some of the flowers if you didn't get enough to make all that you wanted but you do have some flowers. Just be prepared for them to decline.

Also, this is something that you will be spending time on RIGHT before the wedding. Possibly the night before or the morning of. Depending on how quickly you could do all of this, and how many other things you are going to have to do/worry about before the wedding, I would consider skipping this. Make sure that if you do practice you practice with the exact flowers you would on the day, fake or different flowers will behave differently.

emmaaa · June 2015

I would rethink growing your own flowers. I would order them if you want to do them yourself.

I ordered my flowers from Costco and they were perfect!I had 8 bridesmaids, 8 groomsmen, 30 centerpieces, and 2 big arrangements. We did it all ourselves. I would suggest practicing wrapping your bouquet ahead of time to get used to it. For bouts, I did a single rose pinned on, very easy.

kkcc2015 · June 2015

Agree with PP. Growing your own flowers is super risky. If your arrangements will be simple, it really isn't hard to DIY yourself. I ordered mine from bloomsbythebox, prepped the flowers two days before and made the bouquets the afternoon before my wedding. Just make sure you do all of your research on how to care for the flowers you want. Mine are below

MesmrEwe · June 2015

O.k. "Growing your own" flowers - is going to EASILY cost you 4-5x what just ordering them with an upgrade once, fully arranged, and delivered, from a florist... Really, Growing your own, unless you own a commercial greenhouse is just asking for trouble. Weather conditions alone can change how/when the flowers bloom. Then all the other things the PP listed above... It's just not worth the stress!!! Same goes for DIY, you really won't save that much because you're going to spend money on supplies your florist already owns. Nickels and dimes really add up quickly! Go get some quotes from florists, real world ones, not wishful "it costs too much to use a florist who advertises in all of the websites and magazines" vs. "oh, there's a florist, never heard of them before, let's check them out!" and finding someone to hand the detail off to sticking to your budget.

I just ordered my parent's Anniversary flowers online from Sam's - and was freaking out when I hadn't gotten the tracking number the morning they were suppose to be delivered. They arrived before noon the day I had ordered them to be delivered for, but that's not the point. The flowers were beautiful, and super easy to just cut the bottoms off and place in water, but honestly, I wouldn't want that kind of stress on the days/morning leading up to my wedding. It was stressful enough for an anniversary where there weren't NEARLY as many details to attend to!

cgss11 · June 2015

I can't speak for growing them, but for a friends wedding I helped make the bouquets (wrap? Never heard of that). We used roses, cut them to the right length, and just held a bunch, got them looking nice, and wrapped with tape. The floral tape didn't hold tight enough though, so we then used duct tape. We put ribbon over top of that, secured it with a pin, and it looked great!

So it can be done. The flowers looked very nice. It was a bit of work the night before the wedding, but it really wasn't bad, and we had fun working on it together.

Knottie1430965129 · June 2015

I can see how growing my own could go wrong. I have asked some local stores what their prices run on gerber daisies and roses vs. having bouquets made, one girl even told me "if you are thinking about just having us do them, I would not say they are for a wedding, the price almost doubles." I don't mind spending the evening before doing last minute details, I will most likely be down at the hotel the night before alone so I will be bored. I priced the center pieces on Amazon, and it will be under $100, and they will be done well in advance so I can drop them off to the venue for set up a week or so prior to the wedding. I don't want to take on our whole wedding as a DIY, I just thought the minimal flowers and simple center pieces sounded like something to keep me busy and a way to save a bit so we could redirect some of the cash flow to nicer gifts for bridal party and parents.
Thanks for all the input! I have a little less than 1 year, so I will keep looking for florists, closer to the area of our venue, and see what they come up with

jacques27 · June 2015

Knottie1430965129 said:

I can see how growing my own could go wrong. I have asked some local stores what their prices run on gerber daisies and roses vs. having bouquets made, one girl even told me "if you are thinking about just having us do them, I would not say they are for a wedding, the price almost doubles." I don't mind spending the evening before doing last minute details, I will most likely be down at the hotel the night before alone so I will be bored. I priced the center pieces on Amazon, and it will be under $100, and they will be done well in advance so I can drop them off to the venue for set up a week or so prior to the wedding. I don't want to take on our whole wedding as a DIY, I just thought the minimal flowers and simple center pieces sounded like something to keep me busy and a way to save a bit so we could redirect some of the cash flow to nicer gifts for bridal party and parents. Thanks for all the input! I have a little less than 1 year, so I will keep looking for florists, closer to the area of our venue, and see what they come up with

Gerbera daisies are fairly cheap, relatively speaking. You could even just go to any florist shop, pick out a couple dozen and then wrap them yourself. If you aren't a gardener, growing your own wedding bouquet isn't the way I would start (and gardening is expensive and time-consuming). The good news is that Gerbera daisies are relatively hearty.

Practice first though. Flower arranging is deceptive - it actually takes skill to make it look like those picture perfect arrangements you see in photos. Go grab some cheap bouquets from a flowers market (they're $5-6 for HUGE bouquets at my farmers' market - Trader Joe's has them for $9.99). Maybe I'm just lucky with the markets here, but here's an example of what that buys you: http://www.yelp.com/biz_photos/maple-grove-farmers-market-maple-grove?select=iQ1iW2G96eNS2hD3aIXgLw

As for the shoes, who cares? If it makes you happy, wear them. Although FMIL seems a little traditional so if it's going to make you upset at all, stop sharing those kinds of details with her. How does what you wear on your feet affect her or need to have group involvement? Though, I will say, unless you're planning to walk down the aisle with your dress hitched around your knees, no one is going to be seeing your shoes so tying them into the bouquets isn't really something that's going to be noticed except in like one or two photos where you might hike up the dress to purposely show off the shoes.

ETA: I wouldn't PLAN on being bored and purposely taking on last minute details to alleviate your boredom. You will be surprised at the ACTUAL last minute details that will crop up and need your attention.

MnHGirl · June 2015

As mentioned- I would not plan on growing them yourself.

I literally had a random stranger come to my house late last summer wanting to know if she could cut some flowers-(I have a couple hydrangea bushes where the flowers start white and then trickle into pink (really pretty). When I asked why she said that her daughter was getting married that weekend and the flowers they were planning on using did not pan out (they said it was a small very low budget wedding). The daughter had driven by our place and loved the way the hydrangeas looked. I did let her cut what she needed and didn't charge her anything - but why put yourself in that position?

Both my older sisters bought flowers online and we assembled them the day before the ceremony. It was not fun and stressful since we were on a time crunch and there was other things that needed to get done. If you are set on real flowers I would price them out already done and delivered. If you are OK with fake flowers you can do them well ahead of time. Since we had a longer engagement I was able to get spring/summer flowers on clearance and they look pretty good. Around $200 total for a wedding party, parents, grandparents, centerpieces, and misc flowers. It also gave me a lot of time to finish them without the time cruch.

[Deleted User] · July 2015

Another vote for not counting on growing them yourself. Something to consider with doing the bouquets yourself with is what will your schedule the week of the wedding look like? Because you can't do the flowers until the day before at the earliest, and do you have the space to keep them in water in a cool place like a fridge.

Another idea is that I have seen some very beautiful silk gerber daisies at the store. Maybe consider doing silk flowers for the arrangments. Then you can do them weeks in advance and be able to just put them in a plastic box to store them in & forget about them until the wedding.

Knottie1430965129 · July 2015

Erikan73: I do plan on using silk flowers for the center pieces, they only require a single Gerber daisy bloom attached to a ribbon around a column candle inside a large white lantern. I agree, some manufacturers have very beautiful and almost real-looking flowers.

Jacques27: Yes, we have some decent farmer's markets in my area as well, I bought a really pretty potted Gerber in the exact color I am looking for a few weeks ago, and everyone ooohs and aaahhhs over it. I will contact them in regards to purchasing bulk daisies rather than seeds or pre-planted flowers

Also, it doesn't bother me that FMIL is more traditional, she is also very frugal and did everything for her wedding on a very tight budget. Not because she couldn't afford it, but because she doesn't like to spend money on things that only happen for a short period of time (wearing dress, flowers, food...etc). FI has explained to her that we appreciate her ideas, but we are paying for this on our own, and if we want to splurge/save/(wear pink shoes) on certain things we will do so. She seems content with that

MnHGirl: It was very kind of you to allow the woman to cut flowers. I see how growing my own flowers may not work out in my favor, multiple factors playing a role. I will definitely look around at the farmer's markets, and maybe I'll try some shops closer to the venue

I appreciate everyone's input!! Thank you all!

stephanie59hickman · July 2015

I considered doing my own floral arrangements for about a minute and when I realized that I'm not a professional florist and that it would be more headache than it was worth, I hired a florist to do everything. If you are inclined in floral arrangements then I would say, go for it! I, however, am not.

My friend got married a couple years ago and she was on a super tight budget so she decided to buy some flowers from a retailer that sells individual stems and then arrange them and wrap them herself. She used a youtube tutorial video to learn how to wrap them and did a good job but she told me that if she could do it over again, she would have hired a florist. She said that learning how to wrap them was much harder than she thought it would be and took several hours.

As far as your FMIL, it seems that she has a lot of opinions about a wedding that she's not paying for. I assume that it's coming from a good place so if I were you, I would nicely say to her that you appreciate the suggestion but you are going to do _______ instead. If she still won't give it a rest, either ignore her or if you feel like that would majorly upset her, think about what she's saying and why it's important to her. Genuinely consider her opinions and try to foster as good a relationship as possible with her. You may be marrying one person and not his family, but you will have to deal with them for the rest of your life.

[Deleted User] · July 2015

OK here is my real life, save some money, I will do it myself story from my first wedding.

I decided to do the bridemaids bouquets myself to save some money as well as the centerpieces for the wedding tables and some small arrangements here and there.

I used a wholesale local florist near me to buy the flowers, mostly tulips for centerpieces and ordered several dozen roses and flowers from 1800flowers. I wanted hydrangeas in the bridesmaids bouquets but when they arrived the day before they were totally wilted and unusable. Luckily my parents had a blooming hydrangea bush I borrowed some flowers for.

The night before the wedding my maid of honor and I started to assemble to bouquets (5-6 If I remember), and she fell asleep and I was up until 2:00am completing them....

The next day I had brunch with my bridesmaids and we had to babysit the flowers in ice water the whole time, so they wouldn't wilt. We then went to the venue to complete the centerpieces. Overall, I might have saved money, but not time or my sanity. The day would have been better spent relaxing.

Here is how the bridesmaid flowers looked, my bouquet was made by the florist.

emmaaa · July 2015

I disagree with PP saying it ends up costing you more to do it yourself. As I mentioned. I bought my flowers from Costco. It cost about $600 for 400 roses, mixed greenery, and baby's breath. With 8 BMs and 8 GM plus my bouquet, plus 30 centerpieces, two large arrangements, and flowers for moms and grandmothers, every florist quoted us at or above $2,000. All we had to buy extra was ribbon and pins. That probably cost $50 tops.

We had no problem with delivery. My wedding was two days after Christmas. We picked the flowers up from Costco on Wednesday. They were a little smushed from packaging but we put them in buckets with water and kept in a cool room and the perked right back up. Most places you order flowers from will tell you that you should get them a couple of days early so they can be put in water.

Also, on the time note. It took about 1 hour for my bouquet and 30 minutes for all BM's. It took about 1 hour to put the arrangements on the table. I did the two large arrangements in less than 10 minutes. The bouts that the GM and DH (and 3 ushers) were a single rose pinned on their coat. To make a bout you need the green wrap and can add baby's breath or other flowers but I went simple.

Like I mentioned before. I would practice before. I did my bouquet for my bridal portraits with flowers from Harris Teeter and Costco. This helps you have an idea of how long it will take and how to wrap and arrange it.

Obviously the success will vary by person and their ability to put together the bouquets and arrangements but I can say that for me personally, I had no problem. Also, depending on the look you are going for will depend on how achievable that is without experience.

FTR, please listen to reccommendations from whoever you purchase flowers from on delivery. As I said, they will arrive looking smushed and wilted from shipping and need a day or two to perk up.

hellohkb · July 2015

emmaaa said:
I disagree with PP saying it ends up costing you more to do it yourself. As I mentioned. I bought my flowers from Costco. It cost about $600 for 400 roses, mixed greenery, and baby's breath. With 8 BMs and 8 GM plus my bouquet, plus 30 centerpieces, two large arrangements, and flowers for moms and grandmothers, every florist quoted us at or above $2,000. All we had to buy extra was ribbon and pins. That probably cost $50 tops.

We had no problem with delivery. My wedding was two days after Christmas. We picked the flowers up from Costco on Wednesday. They were a little smushed from packaging but we put them in buckets with water and kept in a cool room and the perked right back up. Most places you order flowers from will tell you that you should get them a couple of days early so they can be put in water.

Also, on the time note. It took about 1 hour for my bouquet and 30 minutes for all BM's. It took about 1 hour to put the arrangements on the table. I did the two large arrangements in less than 10 minutes. The bouts that the GM and DH (and 3 ushers) were a single rose pinned on their coat. To make a bout you need the green wrap and can add baby's breath or other flowers but I went simple.

Like I mentioned before. I would practice before. I did my bouquet for my bridal portraits with flowers from Harris Teeter and Costco. This helps you have an idea of how long it will take and how to wrap and arrange it.

Obviously the success will vary by person and their ability to put together the bouquets and arrangements but I can say that for me personally, I had no problem. Also, depending on the look you are going for will depend on how achievable that is without experience.

FTR, please listen to reccommendations from whoever you purchase flowers from on delivery. As I said, they will arrive looking smushed and wilted from shipping and need a day or two to perk up.

You did an amazing job. If you ever feel compelled to do a tutorial I won't discourage it

hellohkb · July 2015

OP, I also would like to do my own bouquets. I've been watching youtube videos on how to make your own. I would advise getting in a lot of practice.

lachattefatale · July 2015

FI was shocked when I told him how much flowers can cost, and he actually asked me if it's possible to just order flowers and put them together ourselves. FI doesn't like to DIY anything if he can help it, so I was pretty shocked when he suggested it. Anyway, so I think we're doing our own as well. I'll probably buy a few loose bunches of flowers from Trader Joe's or something to practice on before I even get to a proper test-run with a bulk flower company.

As for growing your own, it depends how green your thumb is and how well gerberas grow in your area (which will affect when/if they bloom as well as how healthy they are). It's certainly possible, but you'd want to grow a lot to make sure you have enough blooms to be picky about bug-eaten or wilty ones. Another option might be to plant just a few of the same kind you intend to use in your bouquets, but not actually worry about using your own blooms. I plan to do that for whichever variety of peony I end up using.

Knottie1430965129 · July 2015

Thank you for all the added advice and personal stories! I have been pricing some florists in the area of our venue as a just-in-case, and FI was definitely shocked when he heard first hand how much flowers cost for a wedding. He admitted that when I explained my reasoning, he thought I was exaggerating the cost and just wanted a project of my own to say "Look! I did that!" We recently booked our photographer and DJ, and I think after those 2 deposits, he is a little more comfortable with the idea of throwing a few DIY items in.

emmaaa: Your bouquets look great!

2xbridekeepingitreal: You did a wonderful job on your bridesmaid's bouquets!

Both of you give me hope that it can be done, especially with the small amount of flowers I really need.

I am definitely staying open to the possibility of needing the professional touch, but will at least go through some trials as suggested to see if I am good enough!

MesmrEwe · July 2015

SITB...

Also, add what these trial runs cost into the "what did it cost me to DIY!".. If you spend an extra $50-100 per "Trial run" that adds up especially when you can order a Vera Wang tied bouquet from FTD delivered for $72 (I'm ordering flowers for my Godmother's B-day and saw that on there)...

Ridiculous to wrap my own bouquets?

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