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Etiquette

Split Reception

PBorgstede91PBorgstede91 member
Fourth Anniversary 10 Comments
edited September 2015 in Etiquette
Okay my fiancé and I are trying to save money on our wedding. I was a manager for a restaurant years ago but remained close with the owner and he has offered to cater our wedding for free. 
Because of this we needed to find a low cost space to eat. We chose a different section of our ceremony location(a state park).
So what we want to do is have the ceremony, have the food at the park.
We have rented the top floor of a local venue and want to do the dancing, drinking, toasts and cake at this location.
My question is how to explain this in the invitations and how to word that?
Thanks!


edited for my terrible grammar 

Re: Split Reception

  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    I assume everyone is invited to both?


    Is there a reason why you can't a place to do the whole reception in one place.      It's one thing to go from the ceremony to the reception. It's not another to start a reception at one place and then somewhere else.  I have a feeling you are going to lose people between the park and the roof top.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
    OliveOilsMomlc07Blue_Bird[Deleted User]
  • lyndausvi said:
    I assume everyone is invited to both?


    Is there a reason why you can't a place to do the whole reception in one place.      It's one thing to go from the ceremony to the reception. It's not another to start a reception at one place and then somewhere else.  I have a feeling you are going to lose people between the park and the roof top.
    Everyone is invited to both yes. 
    The reason I can't have the whole reception on the roof top is I can't bring in my own (free) food and it would add an additional $1000-$1500.
    I can't have it all at the park because it closes at sunset(around 5:45pm here in November) and no alcohol allowed.

    That's what I'm worried about because it's so weird of a set up.... :/
  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited September 2015
    How far are these 2 places?  Walkable?  If not I would keep looking.



    eta - Or have the cake at the park. Then  send out another invite for the after-party.  That way everyone gets cake, but everyone is not obligated to attend the 2nd place.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • lyndausvi said:
    How far are these 2 places?  Walkable?  If not I would keep looking.
    Not walkable but a very short drive : /
  • lyndausvi said:
    Have the food and cake at the park. Then  send out another invite for the after-party.  That way everyone gets cake, but everyone is not obligated to attend the 2nd place.
    This! You're perfect!
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    lyndausvi said:
    I assume everyone is invited to both?


    Is there a reason why you can't a place to do the whole reception in one place.      It's one thing to go from the ceremony to the reception. It's not another to start a reception at one place and then somewhere else.  I have a feeling you are going to lose people between the park and the roof top.
    Everyone is invited to both yes. 
    The reason I can't have the whole reception on the roof top is I can't bring in my own (free) food and it would add an additional $1000-$1500.
    I can't have it all at the park because it closes at sunset(around 5:45pm here in November) and no alcohol allowed.

    That's what I'm worried about because it's so weird of a set up.... :/
    What is your geographical location?  An outdoor ceremony and dinner in a state park in November sounds questionable.  Do you have an indoor option in case of inclement weather?

    I assume you will be hosting the drinks at your rooftop location as well.  Is this rooftop venue outdoors as well?
  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited September 2015
    MobKaz said:
    lyndausvi said:
    I assume everyone is invited to both?


    Is there a reason why you can't a place to do the whole reception in one place.      It's one thing to go from the ceremony to the reception. It's not another to start a reception at one place and then somewhere else.  I have a feeling you are going to lose people between the park and the roof top.
    Everyone is invited to both yes. 
    The reason I can't have the whole reception on the roof top is I can't bring in my own (free) food and it would add an additional $1000-$1500.
    I can't have it all at the park because it closes at sunset(around 5:45pm here in November) and no alcohol allowed.

    That's what I'm worried about because it's so weird of a set up.... :/
    What is your geographical location?  An outdoor ceremony and dinner in a state park in November sounds questionable.  Do you have an indoor option in case of inclement weather?

    I assume you will be hosting the drinks at your rooftop location as well.  Is this rooftop venue outdoors as well?
    She lives in Florida.

    But a back up plan is a must.  Trust me. I was to have a beach wedding, mother nature had other plans for us.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Its hard to word because it is pretty complicated.

    Having a ceremony one place a reception elsewhere is totally normal. But this is a reception and a party, just odd. I believe you will have a lot of people not get to the bar. (I will say if it is a super small wedding you might be fine.)

    I would have said keep looking for a different reception place but you have already signed. In this case I agree with PP. You have a wedding/reception at the park and then invite everyone to the after party at the bar. You will lose people but you need to host everything at the party as well.
  • my concern would be a lot of people leaving after dinner and not doing the drinks/dancing/cake part. Nothing wrong with that but if you're shelling out a lot of $$ for the rooftop space that would suck if a lot of people didn't go to it since it seemed more "after party" than part of the reception  
    PrettyGirlLostlc07[Deleted User]
  • Another vote for food & cake at one venue and maybe any special dances you want to do. This way those who aren't into drinking & dancing can go home from that, while being properly hosted, and those that like to party, can join you at the next location.
  • anjemonanjemon Minnie and Paul (MN) member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    Can you do dinner really close to the ceremony space? Within eye sight of everyone leaving? Because then it might feel like you're doing the ceremony/dinner at one place and the dancing at another - leaving you with only two locations which is more normal. You will probably lose people between the dinner and the dancing, but perhaps less people.

    And I think having cake at the dinner would be a nice idea. That way if people don't want to come for the dancing portion they won't be really missing out. My grandparents left pretty much right after my dinner because they're early birds and so did my good friend's parents. There's always a few super early birds.
    image
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