Thank you for being a gigantic bitch while I was trying to have a conversation with you last night. It's very evident I care more about your child then you do. Also, word to the wise, your child is YOUR responsibility, no one else's, so blaming everyone else isn't working. I really hope you get your shit together because your daughter is loving what she is doing and she is good at it, and I would hate to loose her.
No love,
Coach of the sport that you "HATE"
********************************************
Dear Cheer Parent #2,
You should have taken our advice at the beginning of the year and pulled your child when we told you to. We laid it all out for you that she was not going to be able to be involved due to her broken arm, but since you are scared to confront your own kid, we are dealing with the backlash. I am in no way sorry that she cried all through practice, because I am done giving her the attention she is craving. It might fly at your house, but not with me.
Frustrated,
Coach
**********************************************
Dear lady who hit BF's work truck,
Thank you for giving me the biggest panic attack yesterday. If a tractor trailer is blocking your lane, chances are you are not going to "squeeze by." I'm glad the cop gave your stupid ass a ticket, and I feel bad that your kid had to get stitches because of your nonsense.
No love,
Panicked GF
********************************************
Dear BF,
I am sorry I kept calling yesterday, but I was so nervous. I'm glad you understood and told your coworker that you would have done the same if you were on the phone with me and heard a crunch and then the phone went dead without explanation. I love you and I am so glad you are safe.
All the hugs and kisses,
Me
P.S. Your comment about how you "Can't wait to have kids" made my ovaries ache. One thing at a time please. I am trying to NOT be BSC, remember.
I can't wait to see you this afternoon. I am drinking ALL THE WATER today and I even did my stretches last night like you told me. I hope that you can tell a difference this visit. If not, I forgive you in advance for the pain. I know I'm asking for it.
All the love,
Your favorite client
Dear Baxter and Bella,
You are the sweetest pups ever. I love waking up to you both snuggling me. All the cairns love their mom!! Lots of snuggles tonight.
Love,
Your favorite human
Dear Shrimp Creole,
OMG you are so good. Get in my belly. I can't wait for our date at lunch.
Why is it so humid today? If one more person asks me to fix the AC I may scream. Fix yo'self.
No love, frustrated coworker
--------------
Dear baby niece/nephew,
April cannot come soon enough. I am so excited to spoil you, even if you are a demon child.
Love, your favorite aunt
-------------
Dear sister,
Sorry not sorry for telling you that you are going to have a demon baby. That's what big sisters are for. You are a ginger and you married a strawberry blonde -- it is inevitable. And plus also, you were the most evil child. There is video proof of you with the most evil smile pinching other children. But it's ok because I will still love and spoil your demon baby.
I am sorry for getting so upset over little things. I really am trying, even when it seems like I'm not. Thank you for sticking with me, because I do not deserve you. One of these days, I'll get myself together and not fall all to pieces at the drop of a hat.
All my love,
Me
************************
Dear Friday,
Please hurry up. I can't handle this week.
Love,
Overwhelmed teacher
******************************
Dear J & C,
You drive me absolutely insane and cause so much drama. I'm tired of being polite when I'd rather give you a piece of my mind, but for the sake of being the bigger person, I smile through gritted teeth. But really... move to another planet.
*****************************************
Dear NEY,
I don't post often, but I love reading these threads. You keep me entertained during the rough days.
You are doing a great job keeping up with your workouts. I'm really proud of you. And today, when you noticed your ankles were skinny? Wasn't that the BEST????
,
Tiger
----------
Dear workers,
Don't screw up my shelves... or my wall. Thanks.
Home owner
---------
Dear new hire,
So far, everyone loves you and is patting me on the back for hiring you. Keep up the good work!
You broke a year ago. Why are you swelling up now?! This week long swelling is not ok. Yes, I know I wore heels, but they were wedges and I barely walked around. Please get better so I can wear pretty shoes to the wedding this weekend.
Love, the short girl who just wants to wear shoes other than flats.
This whole no charting, no temping, because we are getting it on every other day is really working for me. I'm also getting used to candles and flowers and all the sweet things you are doing to "woo" me. Its pretty cute.
-Your loving W
----------------------------------
NEYrs,
I love you guys. I'm so sad when I can't come on here and post as much. I can't wait to meet more of you in Chicago.
-Minskat
----------------------------------
Dear Work,
-Tired
------------------------------------
Dear Self,
Missing two workouts is not ok. You've doubled up on a few other days this week so I'm letting it slide but good job getting back on the train today. You have six weeks to India and are buying a lehenga for the wedding. In case you don't remember, they are tight. I'd love to do something like this but I'm not sure about that much belly hanging out...
WTF, man? We were doing so well this month! Get your shit together so we can keep up the workouts.
Sincerely,
Concerned Self
Dear Work,
All I want to do is figure out wedding crap. I really don't want to spend my time doing what I'm paid to do. *sigh*
No Love,
Employee with Wedding Brain
Dear Photographer,
YOU ARE THE BEST! Ahhh I can't wait to see the final pics from yesterday! I can't believe you're showing off unedited pics to potential clients. Yeah!
Excitedly yours,
Bride
Dear FI,
Stop stressing about the wedding! Let me handle all the wedding stuff while you focus on figuring out your career. We got this! Team Goober 2015!
All the love,
Your FI
Dear Friends who Dropped Out of the Wedding,
You suck. Seriously. It's one thing to drop out of the wedding with 6 weeks to go, it's another to say you aren't even going to attend the wedding. Pardon my French, but fuck you.
I'm so sorry your former friends suck so bad! French is absolutely necessary in this situation. Use all the French you want. I'll even join you. Fucking fuck fuck fuckers.
Re: OLW
Dear Friday,
Please get here. I am done with this week, for no reason really.
Love,
Me
Dear Anneliese,
Mommy and Daddy miss you so so much and love you always. The list we made about you is such a great memory.
Love,
Mommy and Daddy
Dear NEY,
Thank you being a nice distraction while at work. I also can't thank you enough for your support and friendship.
Dear H,
I love you more and more every day. I can't wait to get away for a few days, now just pick a place to go please :-)
Dear Licensing Exam,
I will be passing you two weeks from tomorrow. You better be easy.
Love,
Girl who is sick of studying
I am sorry for getting so upset over little things. I really am trying, even when it seems like I'm not. Thank you for sticking with me, because I do not deserve you. One of these days, I'll get myself together and not fall all to pieces at the drop of a hat.
Please hurry up. I can't handle this week.
Still here and still fabulous!
Please go away so I have time to knot.
Love,
jenjen
*********************
Dear FI,
I am still amazed by how well we navigate disagreements. I know that no matter what happens we will always find a way through it together.
Love,
Your Future Wife
PS - 4 more months!!!
*********************
Dear USCIS,
Please process FI's immigration application quickly after our wedding!
Love,
Impatient
*********************
Dear Self,
WAY TO FUCKING GO ON THE WORKOUTS!!! 10 down, 10 to go!!!! You got this!
Love,
Wants to look amazing for her wedding and honeymoon
*********************
Dear NEY,
THANK YOU for everything. I can't wait to meet more of you in person! You ladies are so wonderful.
smooches!!!
Dear @eilis1228,
I'm so sorry your former friends suck so bad! French is absolutely necessary in this situation. Use all the French you want. I'll even join you. Fucking fuck fuck fuckers.