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Etiquette

How do I not be rude/tiered?

I apologize if this comes out off disjointed, not quite sure how to organize my thoughts on this. My grandmother passed away a few years ago. At family gatherings she had always made homemade cinnamon rolls for everyone. Since she passed I have taken on that "job" at holidays and gatherings. My wedding is in Pittsburgh and both mine and FI's families are from the area. As such we will definitely be having a cookie table (people started volunteering their cookies the moment we got engaged).

If my grandmother were still alive she would have made cinnamon rolls. I would really like to honor her memory by making some myself, however they cannot be frozen so it would have to be done at most two days before the wedding. I am trying to live in reality and know that I cannot possibly plan on dedicating the 4-5 hours it usually takes for even 3 pans. I think I could reasonably plan on making one pan but that would only feed maybe 10-15 depending on the size of pieces (I am invited about 270 people). With that in mind I know that it is super rude to have things for some guests that are not available to all so I guess I am looking for ways to accomplish this without going insane baking or being rude.

Re: How do I not be rude/tiered?

  • Do cookie tables usually have enough of every single type of cookie for everyone? I've always pictured them as, like, two dozen of 12 different kinds, and you get what you get and you don't get upset. I don't think it's tiered at all to just have them on the table (it would be if you served them specifically only to certain people).

    Also have you tried freezing them? Ordinarily yeasted dough cinnamon rolls can be frozen. If you search on TheKitchn.com they have instructions.
    huskypuppy14
  • I just wanted to add that I wish cookie tables were a tradition in New Orleans or Houston, because that would be awesome.

    Maybe when one of my daughters get married I can start the tradition here.
    SP29
  • JBB28 said:
    I apologize if this comes out off disjointed, not quite sure how to organize my thoughts on this. My grandmother passed away a few years ago. At family gatherings she had always made homemade cinnamon rolls for everyone. Since she passed I have taken on that "job" at holidays and gatherings. My wedding is in Pittsburgh and both mine and FI's families are from the area. As such we will definitely be having a cookie table (people started volunteering their cookies the moment we got engaged).

    If my grandmother were still alive she would have made cinnamon rolls. I would really like to honor her memory by making some myself, however they cannot be frozen so it would have to be done at most two days before the wedding. I am trying to live in reality and know that I cannot possibly plan on dedicating the 4-5 hours it usually takes for even 3 pans. I think I could reasonably plan on making one pan but that would only feed maybe 10-15 depending on the size of pieces (I am invited about 270 people). With that in mind I know that it is super rude to have things for some guests that are not available to all so I guess I am looking for ways to accomplish this without going insane baking or being rude.
    This sounds like a great way to honor your grandmother. But at the same time, this sounds very stressful trying to cook something so time consuming right before your wedding. I would not do this for your wedding (unless someone else in your family offers to cook them all for you), as you would need to bake enough for everyone attending. Would you be able to cook them for your rehearsal dinner (assuming you are having one)? Or, agree with @Lizzieyounce that they may make a good breakfast treat to serve to your BM's. Good luck!

    HeffalumpInLoveInQueenssimplylaurel
  • Usually when there is a platter/table, no there isn't enough of every one thing for each guest, but there is enough total for everyone.

    But I think there is a bit of a difference between 2 dozen of 6 different types of cookies and 15 cinnamon buns total. 

    I would suggest making them early and freezing them, or can you make them into a smaller size so you get more? I would think this pretty stressful for you though, so I would be inclined to do something smaller, as suggested, for getting ready. 
  • Are you having a rehearsal dinner? If you were able you could make them for that, and invite other family over for dinner if you wanted and could afford it. I agree with SP29, I see a difference in providing enough cookies for everyone, just different flavors, and providing only a small amount of cinnamon buns. 
    image
    SP29Jen4948
  • Can you cut up the cinnamon rolls? Will most people even want an entire cinnamon roll along with the cookies and everything else they'll be eating? (Yes, my husband would, but probably not most people.)

    At brunches and other events, I have frequently seen cinnamon rolls cut into quarters and set out. I suggest doing that.

    ILoveBeachMusicSP29madamerwin
  • I think that serving them to bridal party and family who will be getting ready with you is probably the way to go. just make sure if they are messy you serve them before everyone is in their fancy clothes!  Or rehearsal dinner would be nice too. I agree with others that you'd need to provide more if you put them on the cookie bar, and that is a lot of stress to commit to right before your wedding!
    SP29
  • While most cookie tables don't have enough of everything for everyone, I think it would be odd (and rude) to have some type of special item, such as grandma's cinnamon rolls, and not have enough of those for everyone. It's a different situation from having a few dozen of a few different kinds of cookies. If it's a special item, there should be enough for everyone.

    I love the ideas of doing it at the rehearsal dinner, or while everyone is getting ready. 
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I like the suggestions of serving them at the rehearsal dinner or while getting ready, and would like to add that if you doing anything the day after your wedding, if time permits you could also serve them then.
  • are you having only 6-6 dozen cookies for 200 people? i hope you have enough cookies so everyone can at least get one or two cookies.

    i am from the new england area the norm for desert is cake with ice cream on the side but if you wanted a desert table the venue would put out all the stops and have and italian venetian table mini pastries cookies etc.

    i wanted that at my wedding but at 10.00 extra pp it was to much of an expense 
  • Just to clarify a Pittsburgh cookie table is baked my friends and family, there will 5-6 dozen of each type of cookie. Based on who has asked to bake so far I think there will likely be literally 100 dozen cookies minimum. We also have a cake but that is usually way less consumed than cookies.
  • It's very sweet of you to want to honor your grandmother in such a special way.  How much time do you have before your wedding?  Is it possible to have a "girls day" with all of the women in the family to teach them how to make the cinnamon rolls and maybe have 2 or 3 of them make a batch in the days leading up to the wedding? It might be a good idea for them to learn the rolls anyways, since it is a family recipe. I love the idea of having them for the RD or getting ready. 

    If you are really wanting to have something of your grandma's on your cookie table, and the rolls cannot freeze, was she known for something else that would be less stressful to make/freeze?  Chances are if you are having such a large wedding, the significance of the cinnamon rolls would be lost a large portion of your guests, which would be a shame given the amount of effort you would put in during the crunch time.

    On a side note, how many cookies are you planning per guest? I'm also from the burgh, and I've seen numbers on here ranging from 3-4 (seriously, who only takes one gob, lady lock, and pizzelle) to 8-12.

  • It's very sweet of you to want to honor your grandmother in such a special way.  How much time do you have before your wedding?  Is it possible to have a "girls day" with all of the women in the family to teach them how to make the cinnamon rolls and maybe have 2 or 3 of them make a batch in the days leading up to the wedding? It might be a good idea for them to learn the rolls anyways, since it is a family recipe. I love the idea of having them for the RD or getting ready. 

    If you are really wanting to have something of your grandma's on your cookie table, and the rolls cannot freeze, was she known for something else that would be less stressful to make/freeze?  Chances are if you are having such a large wedding, the significance of the cinnamon rolls would be lost a large portion of your guests, which would be a shame given the amount of effort you would put in during the crunch time.

    On a side note, how many cookies are you planning per guest? I'm also from the burgh, and I've seen numbers on here ranging from 3-4 (seriously, who only takes one gob, lady lock, and pizzelle) to 8-12.

    OP, please do not make your nearest and dearest work before your wedding so you can have something that you dreamed up. This is very rude, if you want it, you plan on how to do it yourself or hire someone to help you, don't make your family/friends do it. 
    image
    ViczaesarSP29PupatellaInLoveInQueens
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