Baggage

ShesSoCold · September 2015

You guys ever see that dating show on GSN? Contestants pick between three potential dates based on their admitted "baggage".

If you were on that show, what would your three pieces of baggage be?

Mine would be: 1. I don't drink beer. 2. My best friend is my ex-boyfriend. 3. I'm actually crazy. Been in both in and outpatient treatment programs.

ETA: I'd probably change my #3 baggage to "I have an irrational fear of feet". Anyone who would date me would learn soon enough that I'm crazy.

cgss11 · September 2015

This is hard for me..the only one I can think of sure is "I'm a crier."

Is it bad I can instantly list DH's baggage instead? Ha. But I married him anyways.

thefanciestbeckler · September 2015

I like that show a lot! It's fun to hear all of their weird quirks.

Mine would be:
1. I have to wash my feet every night before bed.
2. When I drink, I always end up shopping online.
3. I have PMDD and it causes me to have severe mood swings/lash out in anger if I don't take BC and antidepressants.

ETA another one could be that my father is crazy (literally has a personality disorder) and he is not on speaking terms with anyone in my family.

novella1186 · September 2015

Oh man... this is hard cuz I feel like I have a lot lol

1. My dad and sister are fucking nuts and it makes me crazy

2. I'm really neurotic

3. I have an awful temper (although it does take a lot to get me mad. But once I'm mad, it's not good)

But I may have to switch one of those out for my stomach issues since I'm not able to drink beer, eat anything spicy, and lately I've been spending a lot of time sitting at home or sleeping and not really going out or doing anything cuz I feel crappy. I can imagine that would make me really not fun to date

Luckily H also likes to sit at home sometimes (especially because then we're not spending money)

ShesSoCold · September 2015

cgss11 said:

This is hard for me..the only one I can think of sure is "I'm a crier." Is it bad I can instantly list DH's baggage instead? Ha. But I married him anyways.

LOL not at all. I could list like 40 for H. I keep telling him that he's going to hate me in 20 years for all the same shit he thinks is cute now.

mileybangerz · September 2015

I don't have any baggage.

thefanciestbeckler · September 2015

Ok people get busy sharing your baggage! Tomorrow is my last day of work before wedding weekend begins, and I am trying not to go crazy over here in my cube!

julieanne912 · September 2015

I'm having a hard time but here it goes:

1) I'm a crier. I cry all the time. But yet, somehow didn't during my wedding ceremony.

2) I can tend to be a bit lazy and phone addicted when I get home from work. I'm content to sit on the couch and play on my phone and watch TV all evening.

3) I'm not good in social situations with new people, unless it's work related.

thisismynickname2 · September 2015

Innnnteresting!

I haven't seen the show, but I thought baggage in general was carrying hurt over a past breakup or some scarring from past relationships, kid custody issues, past illness... major things that color one's current personality or emotional state.

I'm carrying baggage in terms of insecurity over my looks. I know I have plenty of quirks that could drive someone nuts (you're welcome, DH!) but no crazy exes, my health is fine, my family's cool. And I'm not a rabid sports fan, so no emotional outbursts over wins and losses...

onefootinthebayou · September 2015

1.) I don't manage stress as well as I should.

2.) I have a somewhat irrational fear/dread of pregnancy

3.) I don't enjoy the company of dogs. I tolerate them but they seem to like me a lot and jump all over me, which I hate. Sorry dog lovers!

madamerwin · September 2015

This is fun!

1) I, too, am a crier. The worst part is it's usually out of frustration, but I feel like I look like an idiot. I'm also a highly sensitive person.

2) I am a hypochondriac. Find a weird lump? Cancer. Neck hurts? Meningitis. Throat hurts? Also cancer. Weird cramps? Ectopic pregnancy, or cancer. Weird splotch in my vision? Glaucoma. (I'm working on my anxiety, it's actually gotten better with time.)

3) People in general annoy the shit out of me, with the exception of people I know and like. Which is a short list.

@onefootinthebayou I totally feel you on the pregnancy thing... H and I are TTC via IVF, so it's not like a pregnancy would be unexpected or unwanted, but I am terrified of actually being pregnant. Probably because I'm a hypochondriac.

Now that I read this over, I would have a lot less problems if I was a less anxious person.

[Deleted User] · September 2015

thisismynickname said:
Innnnteresting!

I haven't seen the show, but I thought baggage in general was carrying hurt over a past breakup or some scarring from past relationships, kid custody issues, past illness... major things that color one's current personality or emotional state.

I'm carrying baggage in terms of insecurity over my looks. I know I have plenty of quirks that could drive someone nuts (you're welcome, DH!) but no crazy exes, my health is fine, my family's cool. And I'm not a rabid sports fan, so no emotional outbursts over wins and losses...

That's my definition of baggage too. A lot this just seems like "quirks" people have to deal with if they date you.

I had a lot of baggage over my ex b/f- hence why I didn't date for a year after. I still had some when I met Fiance but I'm pretty over that. Though I do have an irrational fear of running into him- last I heard he'd run off tof FL.

My main "quirk" or less than nice quality would be

-needing to be right / defensive if I think you are trying to make me feel stupid (I have always been this way but my ex made it worse)- I'm working on this.

Oh, I can also be impatient- working on that too.

madamerwin · September 2015

FeeleyToBe said: Innnnteresting!
I haven't seen the show, but I thought baggage in general was carrying hurt over a past breakup or some scarring from past relationships, kid custody issues, past illness... major things that color one's current personality or emotional state.
I'm carrying baggage in terms of insecurity over my looks. I know I have plenty of quirks that could drive someone nuts (you're welcome, DH!) but no crazy exes, my health is fine, my family's cool. And I'm not a rabid sports fan, so no emotional outbursts over wins and losses...

That's my definition of baggage too. A lot this just seems like "quirks" people have to deal with if they date you. I had a lot of baggage over my ex b/f- hence why I didn't date for a year after. I still had some when I met Fiance but I'm pretty over that. Though I do have an irrational fear of running into him- last I heard he'd run off tof FL. My main "quirk" or less than nice quality would be -needing to be right / defensive if I think you are trying to make me feel stupid (I have always been this way but my ex made it worse)- I'm working on this. Oh, I can also be impatient- working on that too.

----BOX----

Yeah I think that what you are both referring to is the real definition of baggage, but in the context of the show the OP is talking about, it seems that "baggage" is just "shit about me that some people may find annoying/unattractive."

photokitty · September 2015

I'm not going to pretend to answer this with lame answers...other than SSC, I don't think anyone has the balls to reveal their real #3 baggage...I know I don't

themuffinman16 · September 2015

1) Really close to my twin sister. I call her sometimes twice a day.
2) When I was in college, I slept too hard, one night and wet the bed. Now, I have a phobia of doing that again. I will get up to go pee right before sleep... Even if i just went. If it takes me longer than five minutes to fall asleep, I will have to get up to go pee again... and keep doing this until I fall asleep. This will keep the person next to me awake until I fall asleep. I have also never revealed to anyone IRL that I wet the bed in college. I am guessing people think I have a bladder issue.
3) If the sheets are disheveled in the course of the evening, i won't be sble to sleep until i fix it. I cannot have my skin touch the blanket... My skin must be touching sheets beneath blankets. I will wake up , turn the light on, make the bed, and then go back to sleep. I will still do this if someone next to me is sleeping.
The reason for this is I have a fear that rats will nibble off my hands to stumps while I am sleeping. I feel that keeping my arms beneath the sheets and blankets will protect me. If I cannot feel the sheets, then one of my defenses has been breached, leaving me exposed to rats. I have never seen a rat in any house I have lived in, but you can't reason with this phobia.

kimmiinthemitten · September 2015

Man, 2 of mine are family related lol. 1. I have to always be right in a very obnoxious way. To me that means I have to know everything so I google probably 90 times a day because if I don't know it, I'm reading about it. Before FI and I met I told him I was a handful (meaning this) and he took it as I'm a bitch haha. We straightened that out (for the most part;)). 2. I have major family issues and just recently (last 2 or 3 years) started to get over it and move on. LSDR, mom partied a lot and cheated on dad, left us on Mothers Day when I was 5. Dad had custody but didn't buy us food, basic neccessities and quite frankly CPS should have been called. They both loved me and my sister the best they knew how, unfortunately child rearing was not how they showed love. 3. My parents are Deaf and my mom started going blind about 20 years ago. Because of 2 my sister moved out of state. And now my brother is a recovering addict which leaves me to help with everything my parents need, especially my mom. Luckily, I've worked through 90% ish of my issues and have a good relationship with them today. For example, just this week my mom stayed with us because they were updating the electricity and water in her apartment. I would never get picked on that damn show haha. My FI is clearly a saint:).

novella1186 · September 2015

tfmrserwin said:

This is fun!

1) I, too, am a crier. The worst part is it's usually out of frustration, but I feel like I look like an idiot. I'm also a highly sensitive person.

2) I am a hypochondriac. Find a weird lump? Cancer. Neck hurts? Meningitis. Throat hurts? Also cancer. Weird cramps? Ectopic pregnancy, or cancer. Weird splotch in my vision? Glaucoma. (I'm working on my anxiety, it's actually gotten better with time.)

3) People in general annoy the shit out of me, with the exception of people I know and like. Which is a short list.

@onefootinthebayou I totally feel you on the pregnancy thing... H and I are TTC via IVF, so it's not like a pregnancy would be unexpected or unwanted, but I am terrified of actually being pregnant. Probably because I'm a hypochondriac.

Now that I read this over, I would have a lot less problems if I was a less anxious person.

Me too, to the bolded! The more I think about it, the more I'm pretty anti-social. At least once a week I see something on the news or on facebook or H and I witness something while we're out running errands and all I can say is "I fucking hate people."

The people I care about, I love dearly. Everyone else can fuck off.

novella1186 · September 2015

onefootinthebayou said:

1.) I don't manage stress as well as I should.
2.) I have a somewhat irrational fear/dread of pregnancy
3.) I don't enjoy the company of dogs. I tolerate them but they seem to like me a lot and jump all over me, which I hate. Sorry dog lovers!

I think dogs can sense when you don't like them and it makes them want to smother you with attention. I had a friend in HS who was very much not a dog person, and every time she came over our boxer would sit on her lap. She was the only person he ever did that to.

emmaaa · September 2015

Hmmm, let me think.

1. I generally have to be right and HATE apologizing. This is also coupled with my bad temper.

2. I am a neat freak. I am constantly wiping things down and cleaning. The bed has to be made every morning and the sheets have to be tucked perfectly and if they get messed up. I will get up and fix it.

3. I have a crazy family. My mom is constantly having issues with her BF/FI/whatever he is and no one likes him anyways. My dad is a recovering alcoholic. He is doing well but I make myself pay extra attention to him and he sometimes has a bad temper. I see my family at least once a week and call my dad basically every day.

ShesSoCold · September 2015

tfmrserwin said:

FeeleyToBe said:

Innnnteresting!

I haven't seen the show, but I thought baggage in general was carrying hurt over a past breakup or some scarring from past relationships, kid custody issues, past illness... major things that color one's current personality or emotional state.

I'm carrying baggage in terms of insecurity over my looks. I know I have plenty of quirks that could drive someone nuts (you're welcome, DH!) but no crazy exes, my health is fine, my family's cool. And I'm not a rabid sports fan, so no emotional outbursts over wins and losses...

That's my definition of baggage too. A lot this just seems like "quirks" people have to deal with if they date you. I had a lot of baggage over my ex b/f- hence why I didn't date for a year after. I still had some when I met Fiance but I'm pretty over that. Though I do have an irrational fear of running into him- last I heard he'd run off tof FL. My main "quirk" or less than nice quality would be -needing to be right / defensive if I think you are trying to make me feel stupid (I have always been this way but my ex made it worse)- I'm working on this. Oh, I can also be impatient- working on that too.

----BOX----

Yeah I think that what you are both referring to is the real definition of baggage, but in the context of the show the OP is talking about, it seems that "baggage" is just "shit about me that some people may find annoying/unattractive."

Yes, this. Also, I LOLed at the biggest bag in the picture being "cubs fan".

I definitely have emotional baggage and I'm mega codependent but all that falls into my first #3. :P

thisismynickname2 · September 2015

ShesSoCold said:

tfmrserwin said:

FeeleyToBe said:

Innnnteresting!

I haven't seen the show, but I thought baggage in general was carrying hurt over a past breakup or some scarring from past relationships, kid custody issues, past illness... major things that color one's current personality or emotional state.

I'm carrying baggage in terms of insecurity over my looks. I know I have plenty of quirks that could drive someone nuts (you're welcome, DH!) but no crazy exes, my health is fine, my family's cool. And I'm not a rabid sports fan, so no emotional outbursts over wins and losses...

That's my definition of baggage too. A lot this just seems like "quirks" people have to deal with if they date you. I had a lot of baggage over my ex b/f- hence why I didn't date for a year after. I still had some when I met Fiance but I'm pretty over that. Though I do have an irrational fear of running into him- last I heard he'd run off tof FL. My main "quirk" or less than nice quality would be -needing to be right / defensive if I think you are trying to make me feel stupid (I have always been this way but my ex made it worse)- I'm working on this. Oh, I can also be impatient- working on that too.

----BOX----

Yeah I think that what you are both referring to is the real definition of baggage, but in the context of the show the OP is talking about, it seems that "baggage" is just "shit about me that some people may find annoying/unattractive."

Yes, this. Also, I LOLed at the biggest bag in the picture being "cubs fan".

I definitely have emotional baggage and I'm mega codependent but all that falls into my first #3. :P

PREEMPTIVE BOX!

Hahaha I love the Cubs Fan baggage too!

Like Novella, I pretty much hate 99% of people but love a handful of people dearly.

lovemesomemonster · September 2015

If we are talking quirks I'm sure FI could come up with a million of them! Here's what I would consider my top 3:

1. I can be super flighty and forget things easily, a month will go by and I'll realize I didn't pay a bill which annoys FI to no end.

2. I was a spoiled only child so I'm used to getting my way, if I don't I still tend to go back to being 4yrs old and cry until I get it (wow, that's shameful).

3. I have anxiety that I'm on meds for, sometimes because of it I will spend an entire day not leaving my house and avoiding everything because I can't deal.

onefootinthebayou · September 2015

novella1186 said:

onefootinthebayou said:

1.) I don't manage stress as well as I should.
2.) I have a somewhat irrational fear/dread of pregnancy
3.) I don't enjoy the company of dogs. I tolerate them but they seem to like me a lot and jump all over me, which I hate. Sorry dog lovers!

I think dogs can sense when you don't like them and it makes them want to smother you with attention. I had a friend in HS who was very much not a dog person, and every time she came over our boxer would sit on her lap. She was the only person he ever did that to.

This is COMPLETELY true. It's not really that I don't like dogs, I think they're generally pretty cute and sweet - it's just that I don't like them on me and all over me. I feel a compulsive need to wash my hands after and I'm totally not like that in general. I like other people's dogs but just don't want my own. I describe it as baggage b/c I feel like 99 out of 100 people say they would like to own a dog with their SO and I don't. It's the only big life choice DH and I disagree on.

redheadbride15 · September 2015

I have a type A personality, with a tendency to be controlling, perfectionist, competitive.

I get overwhelmed and irritated easily and have a hot temper when I'm angry and/or anxious.

I hold a grudge against my mother for leaving when I was 11.

l9i · September 2015

#1 - I'm a planner. My parents always joked that I'd plan for my next birthday a year in advance. I like to plan ahead and sometimes it's irrational. Recently DHs job was up in the air. When my parents wanted to go on vacation it was "I'm not sure. With DHs job we may be moving during that time". We will be starting to TTC soon and that will be the next thing. I won't want to plan things (like a big vacation) because there's a chance I could be pregnant.

#2 - I have digestive issues. If I eat too much of the wrong thing it ends badly. It's something to deal with.

#3 - My family. I never had the best relationship with my mom growing up. It's better now, but we will never be close. I also don't speak to my brother so there's tension with that and of course the forcing of getting us to "be friends".

Honorable mentions would my obsession with my dog, fear of being pregnant and delivering a child, my dislike for people/the public because it reminds me of Idiocracy which is becoming more and more of a documentary, and the ability to be a moody mess.

DarthV8r · September 2015

What's in the past is in the past. LOL Anyone on Baggage is shit next to me.

themosthappy91 · September 2015

Am I the only person who wants people to staaaaaahp with the whole "I hate people" thing? I feel like this is such a trendy thing to say, in the same vein as the "extroverted introvert" BS. What you are identifying is the way everyone feels- all people generally feel annoyed with the other people they encounter out and about in the world. There is nothing genuinely misanthropic about seeing parents letting screaming kids run around unchecked and rolling your eyes and muttering "I hate people." Everyone loves the people they love and could generally leave the rest, that is not a unique condition.

Apparently my baggage is I interrupt perfectly pleasant threads to vent about personal pet peeves. Carry on.

Jen4948 · September 2015

I'm a perfectionist.

I love to read.

I'm me.

hellohkb · September 2015

1) I'm a slob. I leave clothes on the floor, I'll forget to put away things, I'll leave cabinets open and boxes out. FH gets so mad at me.

2) I'm forgetful, spacy, and constantly losing things. CONSTANTLY. I'm currently trying to find my missing passport.

3) I've recently been going through some insecurity issues that I've never gone through before. Now that I'm in my 20s my skin has had these issues like rosacea, dryness, blemishes... I gained 30 or so pounds (I lost 15 and am working on losing 15 more) and I'm SO down about that. I feel as though I can't leave the house without makeup on. It ruins my day, makes me feel like I am not myself. It's REALLY bad. Like my entire day will be ruined if I'm not wearing the appropriate amount of makeup. I never had issues with insecurity and now lately I look so bad

We're getting e pictures done in a few weeks and I'm nervous.

vikinganna87 · September 2015

1. I talk to everyone

2. I can be pretty intense

3. I have a few skeletons in the closet I've generally come to terms with, but if they came out at an unexpected time I'm not sure how the people around me would react.

spockforprez · September 2015

Really bad anxiety. About work, friendships, the wedding, everything. This could be #'s 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and on until infinity. Poor FH.
I struggle with extreme laziness. Doing basic adult things like meal planning, laundry, cleaning, etc. is really hard for me; I think this ties into weight issues (whether one causes the other or they both come from the same issue). FH is working with me on this and I am much better than when we first met. He also had a few problems with adulting (mostly financially) that I helped him with, so it's not too uneven.
Hmm, on the lighter side of things... I hate letting other people drive. IMO 99% of people are fucking terrible drivers, including my FH, and I find it difficult not to criticize. I love to drive so it works out. I also use being the driver as an excuse to monopolize the stereo. Poor FH having to listen to random excerpts from audiobooks!

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