Wedding Reception Forum

Catholic ceremony then reception. What to do for break?

edited September 2015 in Wedding Reception Forum
I had not provided enough info on my previous post and I accidentally had a critical mix up with words. PLEASE do not answer this discussion board anymore. The comments are not helping the initial issue. I can not change the time gap and it is a 2 hour gap instead of 3...not a huge difference. See my other post to PLEASE help me figure out what to do instead of bash me for being inconsiderate to my guest. I included more detail and explanation for why the time limitation is what it is. 

Re: Catholic ceremony then reception. What to do for break?

  • Can you push the ceremony? I had the same issue so I just pushed my ceremony to the 3:00pm available time at the church, cocktail hour at 4, reception at 5. We are also only have a ceremony and not a mass bc FI is not catholic, so it should be done in 30ish min and then 20ish min drive to the reception venue.

    I would look into this because it's against etiquette, and because some of your guests will be floundering. Sure, maybe the younger ones are fine finding a bar, but do you want all your guests coming drunk to your reception? And what about older guests who may not have a hotel room? The final decision for us was made when I thought of FI's 80 year old, sick aunt and my 100 year old grandfather trying to occupy 2-3 hours of time.

    Good luck, I know with accommodating the church it's a hard call, but it is doable!

  • You can't have a gap like that between the ceremony and the reception. You either need to move the ceremony back or move the reception up. 
  • You need to move your reception up so that cocktail hour starts right after your ceremony (including any drive time) wraps up.

    Does it suck that you won't have your later reception that you probably want?  Sure.  But sometimes you have to make concessions when it comes to your guests comfort, and no amount of hosting or entertainment you provide is going to make your guests happy that they have to sit around and wait 3 hours for your reception to start.

  • If I wanted to see a comedian I would buy tickets to the comedian that I want to see. I don't want to go to a wedding where they hire some comedian to keep us occupied during a gap. 

    You said you can't have the wedding earlier than 1:30 but can you have it later? If so move it to 4:00 then with a half hour ceremony and half hour drive you've got no gap between ceremony and reception. If you can't move the ceremony move the reception to start at 2:30. 
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  • Gaps are incredibly rude.  Move up the reception time.  No, I don't need to "see the sights around town," I don't need to "freshen up," and I don't need to "mingle with other guests."  Gaps are presumptuous and an inconvenience to your guests.  The reception is a thank you to your guests for attending your ceremony.  It defeats the point of the thank you if you make them wait for the second half of the wedding. 


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  • Is this your home parish?  Could you try to have the ceremony at a different Church that would allow a later start time?  If not, push up the reception start time.  If you have a receiving line, that could add about 15 minutes to your timeline.  Or are you able to push the ceremony back after the Saturday vigil mass?

    There was about an hour gap between my sister's ceremony and the start of her reception.  My parents hosted all guests at their home for the 45 minutes or so, until guests left for the reception.  My parents only lived 5 minutes from the church though.  Even having another small something between the ceremony and reception needs to be limited in time. 

    You need to figure out a way to close the gap. 

  • Different church or different time or different venue. There is no acceptable activity for the in between time. I wouldn't go to the ceremony and lots of others won't either.
  • My sister had a 3-hour gap between her ceremony & reception, so she could do photos at multiple locations around town. Guests were miserable, some went to their hotel rooms and took a nap, many just hung out in the bar and were drunk before the reception even started (on alcohol they had to pay for), some just left, some skipped the ceremony and just came for the party.  I wasn't able to convince her to avoid the gap, but I at least got her to put schedule of event on the invites so people were aware of the gap and could try to plan accordingly. For people that live nearby, they may be able to go home, but then what really do you do at home for 2 hours?  For people that live farther away, they are really stuck in limbo with nothing to do and nowhere to go. And they likely won't tell you that they were miserable, but they will be.

    Honestly, I'd have to like you a lot to want to spend 10 hours of my day stuck at your wedding.  If I knew about the gap in advance, I'd likely either go to just the ceremony, just the reception, or skip it altogether... depending on how close I was to you. So, like others said, I'd definitely see if you can push the ceremony to later, move the reception to earlier (my reception was mid afternoon and everyone still drank, partied, and had a blast), or find a new venue/date that allows you to eliminate the gap.

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  • I've read a few discussion boards about a long break between the ceremony and appalled that there could be a 3 hour break between the ceremony and reception...

    I am having a catholic ceremony and my priest is not allowing us to have the wedding earlier than 1:30. We will not be having a full traditional catholic ceremony because my FI is not catholic. Our reception is not going to start until ~5. The drive time is 30 min max between the locations. 

    What can we do to keep guest entertained/happy? 

    I have had a friend suggest hiring a comedian because someone had done that in a similar situation. Any advice? 



    And yes.... I sincerely wish there was not a 3 hour gap. 
    The gap could have been avoided had you checked with your parish first regarding ceremony time options. 

    Your reception time line needs to be changed to 3:00 PM.  Hosted or not, a 3 hour interlude between a ceremony and reception is much too long.
  • I had not provided enough info on my previous post and I accidentally had a critical mix up with words. PLEASE do not answer this discussion board anymore. The comments are not helping the initial issue. I can not change the time gap and it is a 2 hour gap instead of 3...not a huge difference. See my other post to PLEASE help me figure out what to do instead of bash me for being inconsiderate to my guest. I included more detail and explanation for why the time limitation is what it is. 
    That's not how this works.  That's not how any of this works.

    Change your reception start time.  If you can't change the ceremony start time, that's your only option.  Sorry it's not what you want to hear, but it's what it is.
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