MOG WANTS TO WEAR SNEAKERS!!!!

ElleSco1717 · October 2015

Help! My future mother in law wants to wear sneakers to our formal evening wedding... I'm dying inside. She does have blance issues but how do i suggest clogs or flats to her without sounding like a bitch?!

climbingsingle · October 2015

Let her wear whatever she wants, especially if she has balance issues. Her footwear will have ZERO impact on your wedding. LET IT GO.

ShesSoCold · October 2015

I have absolutely no idea what kind of shoes, if any, my MIL wore at our wedding.

OliveOilsMom · October 2015

Knottie29582709 said:

Help! My future mother in law wants to wear sneakers to our formal evening wedding... I'm dying inside. She does have blance issues but how do i suggest clogs or flats to her without sounding like a bitch?!

The woman has balance issues! What would you prefer? She face plants down the aisle, into the cake, during the mother/son dance OR she just wears sneakers so she is balanced and steady on her feet? Let her wear the sneakers! It's what she wants!

Maggie0829 · October 2015

So what is the problem? Because I don't see one.

PrettyGirlLost · October 2015

Knottie29582709 said:

Help! My future mother in law wants to wear sneakers to our formal evening wedding... I'm dying inside. She does have blance issues but how do i suggest clogs or flats to her without sounding like a bitch?!

You don't. You don't get to dictate to your guests what they wear on their feet or bodies, formal wedding or not. No one will notice or give a flying rat's ass what you as the bride are wearing on your feet, least of all what the MOG is wearing on her feet.

Fugghetaboutit.

sparklepants41 · October 2015

Seriously. For all I know my MIL could have worn bunny slippers. Which, actually, would have been awesome.

Regardless, your FMIL's footwear should not be your concern. Especially given her balance issues, her comfort should be your concern.

lyndausvi · October 2015

LET IT GO !!!!!

Geez, my mom has balance issues. Now she is in a boot, with a shoe lift on the other side to help even her out. Sneakers are the best option for her. If that is what it takes for her to be comfortable and not fall then that is what it takes.

It's so not a big deal. Really, not a big deal. If anyone dares judges her then fuck them.

Safety trumps fashion EVERY SINGLE TIME!!!!!

climbingsingle · October 2015

sparklepants41 said:

Seriously. For all I know my MIL could have worn bunny slippers. Which, actually, would have been awesome.

Regardless, your FMIL's footwear should not be your concern. Especially given her balance issues, her comfort should be your concern.

I seriously can only remember what one person wore on their feet, and that's because she was wearing bedazzled cowboy boots and those are a little out of place in New York (downstate at least. I have no idea if people wear them upstate). Other than that, I have no clue what people wore on their feet.

STARMOON44 · October 2015

This is easy- you just crop her feet out of the pictures if it's really that upsetting to you.

And you let her wear whatever she wants, because if she's saying she needs to stand out by wearing shoes that don't fit the formality of the event, she has clearly already thought about this and decided that is what she needs to do.

princessleia22 · October 2015

Yeah, I agree with others. Nobody will notice her shoes (they will be looking at you, not her, anyway). She's not even in the wedding party or standing up. Her shoes will not ruin your wedding. Just let her wear her sneakers. Especially if she has health issues to justify it. I have back problems and wearing the wrong shoes can leave me bedridden for days. Even many flats won't work for me. I would be offended if someone tried to force me to wear shoes that I knew would leave me uncomfortable.

ETA: Plus, if she has balance issues and you force her to wear unfamiliar shoes, you will feel absolutely horrible if she falls down dancing and breaks her hip. Now, that would put a damper on your wedding... a lot more than her wearing sneakers would.

photokitty · October 2015

Let her wear whatever she wants, unless she wants to wear those shoes with built in wheels...those should be illegal in all 50 states.

GoldenPenguin · October 2015

I wore sneakers to my wedding. White Chuck Taylors.

Guess I need a do-over.

kimmiinthemitten · October 2015

Let the woman wear her sneaks!

My FMIL has scoliosis, and working as an OR Nurse for 35 years has done a number on her hips, so on bad days she uses a HC parking permit and a cane. She's going to tell us during the cocktail hour/reception if she feels comfortable doing the Mother/Son dance because she's so self conscious of her posture that she may not want to do it.

And she's BSC so I'm not even sure if I like her yet, but with all that said I hope she wears sneakers because our wedding should be the last thing she puts ahead of her own discomfort.

kvruns · October 2015

my mom wore her awful-to-me SAS shoes that are basically sneakers. She kept saying she would wear some sandals, and she did for a bit, but her feet were hurting and she has enough issues walking that I was like dude just put on the SAS shoes, no one cares what you are wearing.

missa011 · October 2015

My mom has a lot of foot problems and I told her she can wear whatever she wants and will feel comfortable in, as she is in near-constant pain normally. She actually found a very supportive small heel, but honestly, had she decided to wear her Crocs (the most comfy shoe for her), I would not care.

mileybangerz · October 2015

Not to make light of your FMIL's balance issues ....

Which would be more embarrassing? Her wearing her sneakers & being comfortable? Or if she wore fancy-shoes you wanted and possibly ended up like this at your wedding?

MrsMack10612 · October 2015

My mother is disabled and spent most of our wedding in a wheelchair (if she wasn't seated at dinner or in the pew at the church). She wore black, Isotoner style slippers and had a knee length dress. I didn't care. She was there. We lost her a year later, she could have worn a gunny sack and I wouldn't have cared.

NowIamMrsKlein · October 2015

GoldenPenguin said:

I wore sneakers to my wedding. White Chuck Taylors.

Guess I need a do-over.

Me too! Except mine weren't even white. They were teal. Sigh, I don't know if i can afford a do-over...

lnixon8 · October 2015

My MIL changed into silk pajamas and slippers when there was still about 2 hours left of our reception. I didn't notice. My Mamam rolled her eyes and told me about it later but other than, I didn't hear a word about it. If anything, people will judge her, not you.

julieanne912 · October 2015

My H's dad wore crocs, jeans, and a polo shirt untucked to our wedding. That's pretty much what he wears every day, except swap the polo for a tshirt. I did not give two shits, because it didn't affect me or any other guests' enjoyment. At least he was being himself.

Maggie0829 · October 2015

NowIamMrsKlein said:

GoldenPenguin said:

I wore sneakers to my wedding. White Chuck Taylors.

Guess I need a do-over.

Me too! Except mine weren't even white. They were teal. Sigh, I don't know if i can afford a do-over...

Just sign up for a GFM. I mean obviously you deserve to have others pay for your do over.

PamBeesly524 · October 2015

NowIamMrsKlein said:

GoldenPenguin said:

I wore sneakers to my wedding. White Chuck Taylors.

Guess I need a do-over.

Me too! Except mine weren't even white. They were teal. Sigh, I don't know if i can afford a do-over...

Just take out a loan or two and make it work! You need everything to be perfect.

ryanandjoe4 · October 2015

julieanne912 said:

My H's dad wore crocs, jeans, and a polo shirt untucked to our wedding. That's pretty much what he wears every day, except swap the polo for a tshirt. I did not give two shits, because it didn't affect me or any other guests' enjoyment. At least he was being himself.

I saw a guy on the cruise last week in jeans, purple polo, and purple crocks, the only thought I had was does he have a matching pair of crocks for every color polo he has.. please tell me this was your FIL on the cruise with me, and if so does he have crocks to match every color polo!?

jacques27 · October 2015

I don't think I've ever seen anything less worthy of all caps and four exclamation points than this post.

You can't say it without sounding like a bitch because it's a bitchy thing to say to someone that you care more about how their feet look than whether they are safe and comfortable.

My mother has a whole host of foot and orthopedic problems that give her very limited (read: ugly) options in footwear. Do you really think that if cute stylish shoes were a feasible option she would opt to wear heavy tennis shoes that match nothing? No.

I give zero fucks about how her shoes look because her comfort is important me. Giving zero fucks is my recommended course of action for you.

pinkcow13 · October 2015

This can't be real life. Why do you care what other people wear to your wedding?

julieanne912 · October 2015

ryanandjoe4 said:

julieanne912 said:

My H's dad wore crocs, jeans, and a polo shirt untucked to our wedding. That's pretty much what he wears every day, except swap the polo for a tshirt. I did not give two shits, because it didn't affect me or any other guests' enjoyment. At least he was being himself.

I saw a guy on the cruise last week in jeans, purple polo, and purple crocks, the only thought I had was does he have a matching pair of crocks for every color polo he has.. please tell me this was your FIL on the cruise with me, and if so does he have crocks to match every color polo!?

Haha no he only has black crocs, and only ever wears white or light grey Carrhart shirts.

drunkenwitch · October 2015

Oh you should totally fire that bitch and hire a new MIL who understands that your VISION is waayyy more important than her comfort.

hellohkb · October 2015

Who cares? Let her wear the damn sneakers.

Also, is she wearing a long gown? Chances are people will not even be able to SEE them under the gown. And if they do, let's go back to my original question... Who cares??

madamerwin · October 2015

Like PPs, I have no clue what type of shoes most people wore at our wedding. Except H's grandma, who rocked a purple crushed velvet track suit (with matching crushed velvet shirt!) and old lady sneakers. She looked awesome.

You don't get to dictate what ANYONE wears to your wedding, and the fact that FMIL has balance issues means you should especially not care. Did you also put a dress code on your wedding website? If so, you should take it down immediately, because unless you're having a true black tie event, or your venue dictates a dress code (like country club requiring jackets on male guests), then it is wholly inappropriate.

hellosweetie1015 · October 2015

Alright. I'm breaking out of lurkerdom for this one.

You can't suggest this without "sounding like a bitch" (please note I used your wording, OP). You (general) don't get to tell people what to wear. Nobody will care what your FMIL is wearing on her feet; likely a good portion of the people you're inviting will know she has balance issues. Given today's environment of "What the lady in the white dress says, goes" when it comes to weddings, a lot of people will be happily surprised that you were "gracious" enough to "allow" your FMIL to wear sneakers.

Useful, relevant storytime: I HATE Crocs clogs and think they are the hideousest of the hideous. Really, I cannot think of a shoe I hate more. I would rather see a pair of hot pink cowboy boots made of panda-bear leather and bedazzled with offensive redneck symbols than Crocs clogs.

My dad has some serious foot/knee/lower leg issues. The only shoes he is comfortable in? Crocs clogs.

When he asked what I wanted him to wear (aside: why do people do this? I promise you, you do not want my fashion opinion), I told my dad he could wear Crocs clogs to the wedding. I'll admit to telling him I'd buy him a new pair special, so they'd at least be new, less smelly, and actually black. But I didn't, wouldn't, and can't, demand that he wear anything. As of today, he has not taken me up on the offer, and is insisting he will wear penny loafers. But the option is available to him until I no longer have time to send him to the store.

MOG WANTS TO WEAR SNEAKERS!!!!

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