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can't decided on my maid of honor

Knottie1444680555Knottie1444680555 member
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in Moms and Maids
I will have 7 all together.

1. Friend/stbsil and how I meet my fiance. She was married and thought maybe my matron of honor or maid of honor
2. Friend who is married but just had a baby. Can be matron of honor
3. Friend so is very creative maybe maid of honor
(2 and 3 we are like the 3 amigos. We are always together as 3. )
4. My underage sister
5. My sister who is a collage student
6. His other sister
7. Other best friend from 5th grade.

Its really up to 1, 2 and 3. So one will be left out I'm just not sure who.
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Re: can't decided on my maid of honor

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    JediElizabethJediElizabeth member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Knottie1444680555 said:

    I will have 7 all together.

    1. Friend/stbsil and how I meet my fiance. She was married and thought maybe my matron of honor or maid of honor
    2. Friend who is married but just had a baby. Can be matron of honor
    3. Friend so is very creative maybe maid of honor
    (2 and 3 we are like the 3 amigos. We are always together as 3. )
    4. My underage sister
    5. My sister who is a collage student
    6. His other sister
    7. Other best friend from 5th grade.

    Its really up to 1, 2 and 3. So one will be left out I'm just not sure who.

    Don't have any maid or matron of honor. You don't need one, and if you can't choose between the 3, it just sounds like a lot of unneeded stress for you.
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    mileybangerzmileybangerz member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary Name Dropper
    Knottie1444680555 said:

    I will have 7 all together.

    1. Friend/stbsil and how I meet my fiance. She was married and thought maybe my matron of honor or maid of honor
    2. Friend who is married but just had a baby. Can be matron of honor
    3. Friend so is very creative maybe maid of honor
    (2 and 3 we are like the 3 amigos. We are always together as 3. )
    4. My underage sister
    5. My sister who is a collage student
    6. His other sister
    7. Other best friend from 5th grade.

    Its really up to 1, 2 and 3. So one will be left out I'm just not sure who.

    You don't have to have a MOH. Just have all bridesmaids.
    image
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    southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Who are you closest to? Ask that person. If equally close, just don't have an MOH
    *********************************************************************************

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    levioosalevioosa member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    What do you mean by "she is very creative?"  What are you expecting your bridesmaids to do that needs creativity?


    image
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    auriannaaurianna member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited October 2015
    Underage, collaege student, married, unmarried, creative... none of these are at all relevant when picking a MoH.

    The only important thing is who are you closest to?

    The title MoH is an honor you bestow on your closest friend and/or family member who stands beside you on your wedding day. But that's all it is; a title.
    She might hold your bouquet or sign your marriage license but that's the only difference between her and the rest of your bridal party.


    I'm not sure if you brought up age, creativity and possibly familial obligations because you think that the MoH is supposed to throw parties and help with planning the wedding. Because she's not. None of the bridesmaids are. Planning the wedding is 100% the wedding's hosts' responsibilities and parties are all optional gifts and may (or may not) be thrown by anyone (other than you) who'd like to offer to do so.
    So hopefully that makes your decision easier in case it was factoring into it.
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    spockforprezspockforprez member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    If I could go back, I wouldn't designate a MOH. It put a spotlight on my friendship with that woman and made me realize we are not as close as I thought we were, or as close as I would like us to be. (Nothing at all to do with excitement over the wedding or doing extra stuff for me.) That wasn't really a new issue, and the reasons for it have absolutely nothing to do with her being MOH or my wedding at all - but putting that supposed "best of the best" title on her brought my dormant hurt feelings to the surface. 

    I've mostly gotten over it by reminding myself it's just a made-up title and focusing on taking the actions I needed to feel better about our friendship. I really care about her and I want her to be with me on my wedding day. That's all that matters.
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    MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    You could have 2 MOH. If 2 and 3 are your closest friends and you can't choose between them, ask both. Or ask both your sisters. 




                       
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    Knottie1444680555Knottie1444680555 member
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    I know she will be able to help me with the decorations and planning. 
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    ryanandjoe4ryanandjoe4 member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary Name Dropper
    Knottie1444680555 said:
    I know she will be able to help me with the decorations and planning. 
    Please do not let this be the only reason.. she shouldn't have to do more than pick a dress and show up close to sober.. if she offers and you need it great, but do not imply or ask for her help..
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    sparklepants41sparklepants41 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    AddieCake said:
    Pick the prettiest one. That criteria is just as pointless as the other stuff you listed.
    Or the one who will need to lose the least amount of weight, and who will look the best with a (mandated) tan.

    Seriously, OP, if you are all equally close to them, don't have a MOH. Or make the whole BP MOHs. Or have three MOHs. My cousin recently got married and had two MOHs. A friend of mine who got married a few years ago had no MOH. As PPs have stated, don't bog yourself down with unneeded stress. And don't bog your BP down with unneeded stress. You are being honored by their standing up with you during their wedding. It is not polite to dictate your chores to others.
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    AddieCakeAddieCake member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Knottie1444680555 said:
    I know she will be able to help me with the decorations and planning. 

    Ugh. What a gross reason to choose a Maid of HONOR.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
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    Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Knottie1444680555 said:
    I know she will be able to help me with the decorations and planning. 
    That's not her (or anyone else in your wedding party's) job.  If you need that kind of help, hire a wedding coordinator.  The purpose in choosing anyone is to honor them, and nobody is "honored" by being expected to act as an unpaid servant.
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