Wedding Etiquette Forum

Guest Expected A Cash Bar

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Re: Guest Expected A Cash Bar

  • We can't afford an open bar at our wedding and don't think that that's so rude. We're having the one-hour open bar/cocktail hour, champagne toast, and wine at the tables included in the catering package plus a full cash bar for the rest of the night.

    We're also having a great selection of appetizers, a lovely sit-down dinner, a rockin' band, and plenty of other things to show our guests that we appreciate them and are happy to have them there. I highly doubt that anyone is going to miss an all-night open bar at our wedding, and if they do -- after everything else that we're planning to put together a nice event -- then there was really no way we were going to please them anyways.
     
    People should be going to your wedding to celebrate you and this amazing new stage in your life, not to get free drinks and see how much stuff they get.
  • smcstnz said:
    We can't afford an open bar at our wedding and don't think that that's so rude. We're having the one-hour open bar/cocktail hour, champagne toast, and wine at the tables included in the catering package plus a full cash bar for the rest of the night.

    We're also having a great selection of appetizers, a lovely sit-down dinner, a rockin' band, and plenty of other things to show our guests that we appreciate them and are happy to have them there. I highly doubt that anyone is going to miss an all-night open bar at our wedding, and if they do -- after everything else that we're planning to put together a nice event -- then there was really no way we were going to please them anyways.
     
    People should be going to your wedding to celebrate you and this amazing new stage in your life, not to get free drinks and see how much stuff they get.
    Sorry, but that's the definition of rude.

    You invite guests to your event to thank them for attending your ceremony and to have a good time. It's not so that they can pay for the party you decided to have but can't afford. If you can't afford a full bar all night, offer a limited bar or have a dry wedding. Pushing the costs onto your guests is not ok. 
  • I have never been to a wedding that had an open bar, or even a cash bar. All of the weddings I have ever attended have been BYOB. I did not even know that an open bar was "a thing" until my cousin and his, then, fiancé were planning their wedding and told us about the costs and what-not. I will definitely be having an open bar at my reception, but kind of like OP, it is unheard of around here.

  • I have never been to a wedding that had an open bar, or even a cash bar. All of the weddings I have ever attended have been BYOB. I did not even know that an open bar was "a thing" until my cousin and his, then, fiancé were planning their wedding and told us about the costs and what-not. I will definitely be having an open bar at my reception, but kind of like OP, it is unheard of around here.

    Just to clarify: I never said an open bar is "unheard of" from where I'm from.  It's quite common, which was why I was surprised that a guest of mine had attended other weddings that apparently didn't provide one.  I've only been to one wedding in 6+ yrs that was a cash bar and one that was a "bait and switch".


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