Last name that could be a first name vent

lembaslover · February 2016

So when I married my husband I decided to take his last name which could be a common female first name. Well I was pretty excited because it sounds well with my first name but what I've found now is in several e-mails and even sometimes in person people who didn't know me before the name change are calling me by my last name thinking it's my first. It's frustrating because I always sign my e-mails with my first name so all they have to do is look down and see what name I signed it with when they reply. DH has always had this trouble but he said it's just occasional maybe once every couple of months but I swear it is happening to me almost once a day. Some days like today I received 2 e-mails like this and it was once in person. I've corrected one person and they keep doing it.

I guess it's not a huge deal, it's not like they are calling me anything mean but for one it's not my name and for two it kind of sends me a message that they are either lazy or in the case of the people who I've corrected are just rude.

Does anyone else deal with this? Should I just drop it and accept that I will now be called by my last name frequently or keep correcting people?

Also I didn't take his name just because it sounded good with my first name I know it meant a lot to him if I took his name and I did really want to. I knew it'd be a hassle getting it switched (DMV trips, SS office, passport, etc...) but I did not foresee this being an issue lol.

flantastic · February 2016

marriedhamstermom said:

So when I married my husband I decided to take his last name which could be a common female first name. Well I was pretty excited because it sounds well with my first name but what I've found now is in several e-mails and even sometimes in person people who didn't know me before the name change are calling me by my last name thinking it's my first. It's frustrating because I always sign my e-mails with my first name so all they have to do is look down and see what name I signed it with when they reply. DH has always had this trouble but he said it's just occasional maybe once every couple of months but I swear it is happening to me almost once a day. Some days like today I received 2 e-mails like this and it was once in person. I've corrected one person and they keep doing it.

I guess it's not a huge deal, it's not like they are calling me anything mean but for one it's not my name and for two it kind of sends me a message that they are either lazy or in the case of the people who I've corrected are just rude.

Does anyone else deal with this? Should I just drop it and accept that I will now be called by my last name frequently or keep correcting people?

Also I didn't take his name just because it sounded good with my first name I know it meant a lot to him if I took his name and I did really want to. I knew it'd be a hassle getting it switched (DMV trips, SS office, passport, etc...) but I did not foresee this being an issue lol.

That sounds annoying, but also like a pretty good tool - I certainly like to know and would find it funny to see who has enough respect for our correspondence to make sure that they're using my actual name, especially in those cases where I signed it in a previous email.

I am always amused by those who out themselves as careless when they misspell my name, particularly my last name in work emails, because my last name is, you know, part of the email address they're sending it to and may even have already typed out.

CMGragain · February 2016

DH uses his middle name as his first name. I always know when it is a telephone solicitor if they ask for him by his real first name.

ShesSoCold · February 2016

I have nothing to add except I do not trust people with two first names and/or first names as last names. I'm keeping my eye on you, hamstermom.

lyndausvi · February 2016

flantastic said:

marriedhamstermom said:

So when I married my husband I decided to take his last name which could be a common female first name. Well I was pretty excited because it sounds well with my first name but what I've found now is in several e-mails and even sometimes in person people who didn't know me before the name change are calling me by my last name thinking it's my first. It's frustrating because I always sign my e-mails with my first name so all they have to do is look down and see what name I signed it with when they reply. DH has always had this trouble but he said it's just occasional maybe once every couple of months but I swear it is happening to me almost once a day. Some days like today I received 2 e-mails like this and it was once in person. I've corrected one person and they keep doing it.

I guess it's not a huge deal, it's not like they are calling me anything mean but for one it's not my name and for two it kind of sends me a message that they are either lazy or in the case of the people who I've corrected are just rude.

Does anyone else deal with this? Should I just drop it and accept that I will now be called by my last name frequently or keep correcting people?

Also I didn't take his name just because it sounded good with my first name I know it meant a lot to him if I took his name and I did really want to. I knew it'd be a hassle getting it switched (DMV trips, SS office, passport, etc...) but I did not foresee this being an issue lol.

That sounds annoying, but also like a pretty good tool - I certainly like to know and would find it funny to see who has enough respect for our correspondence to make sure that they're using my actual name, especially in those cases where I signed it in a previous email.

I am always amused by those who out themselves as careless when they misspell my name, particularly my last name in work emails, because my last name is, you know, part of the email address they're sending it to and may even have already typed out.

Happens to me ALL THE TIME. Even on here and on FB where my user name IS RIGHT THERE.

Sadly the annoyance will be there for the rest of your life.

CharmedPam · February 2016

lyndausvi said:
Happens to me ALL THE TIME. Even on here and on FB where my user name IS RIGHT THERE.

Sadly the annoyance will be there for the rest of your life.

I think so too. While not the same, my last name LOOKS like a first name If you don't look at it closely. It doesn't happen often where people just think it's my first name, but when it does, people like to point it out in my office.

madamerwin · February 2016

Yep. I had that problem with my maiden name, and I have it with my married name.

My maiden name is a female first name - a not super common, very old-school first name, and a very uncommon last name. I was regularly addressed by my last name, especially in business emails. And it was usually spelled incorrectly to boot.

I thought that getting married would be the end of it, it happens with my married name too (a male name). Sigh.

PamBeesly524 · February 2016

Yep, it's going to happen forever. My new last name is more common I don't get as many errors on it, but I have a first name that is often confused for several other first names. Many people don't bother to check my email address or signature and see if they are spelling it correctly (When you misspell it, it's a different name). It bothers me to no end and I think it's super disrespectful, but I've learned to tone it out.

I also got called a COMPLETELY different name today (i.e if my name is Rachel, I got called Lauren) in an email and I just busted out laughing. Not really related, but also funny.

OliveOilsMom · February 2016

Lived with that until I married and changed my last name to H's. My maiden name was a common Irish last name which is also frequently a first name. So I was one of those shifty people with two first names. It won't stop, so just get used to it! I also have the added bonus of a slightly unusual spelling for my first name, so if I wasn't being called by my last name, I was having my first name misspelled!

cupcait927 · February 2016

You'll have to just learn to deal with it. I grew up with two first names, with my maiden name being a very common female first name as well. I can't even begin to count how many times I would get referred to by my last name in email and in person. Just wait until you get corrected when giving your last name - I ran a 5k a few years ago and packet pickup was organized by last name. The person in charge my line asked for my last name and when I gave it to them, they said "no, I need your last name" and had to explain a couple of times that it was indeed my last name. I'm not a huge fan of my married name but at least I don't have those issues anymore. You'll get used to it - it'll never stop being annoying but soon you'll just come to accept it and be pleasantly surprised when it doesn't happen.

MairePoppy · February 2016

Yep, my e-mail goes to Marie, whoever she is. Doesn't bother me. But then, my real first name is Marilyn, which people confuse with Maryland - now that bugs me.

ShesSoCold · February 2016

MairePoppy said:

Yep, my e-mail goes to Marie, whoever she is. Doesn't bother me. But then, my real first name is Marilyn, which people confuse with Maryland - now that bugs me.

LOL at "whoever she is". I laugh whenever I receive an email - receive - so it's the correct spelling of my name - but then they misspell it in the body of the email. I regularly get emails to my Adrienne@business.com email address that say "Hi Adrianne" or "Adrian".

An old friend of mine named her kid Marylynn but wanted people to pronounce it Marilyn, not Mary-Lynn. Well, dumbass, maybe you should have named her Marilyn.

kvruns · February 2016

lyndausvi said:

Happens to me ALL THE TIME. Even on here and on FB where my user name IS RIGHT THERE.

Sadly the annoyance will be there for the rest of your life.

for the longest time I read your name as Lyn Davis

MairePoppy · February 2016

Marylynn? That's awful. Poor kid will never find a pencil or mug with that on it. @ShesSoCold

spockforprez · February 2016

I think it's really rude. I guess it can be an honest mistake, but not really if people are taking the time to read for comprehension. It's literally all over the email... in the "from" box, in your signature, in the details of the email trail... idk, I just don't see an excuse. Obviously there's nothing you can do except maybe BOLD AND CHANGE COLOR. Hehehe.

Just kidding, obvs..........

I had a coworker named Yvonne and she corresponded with a guy for 4-5 emails. In the very last email he responded, "Thanks Tracy!" ...... ooookkkk. Also she liked to tell a story in which she answered the phone with "This is Yvonne" and that caused several people to think her name was Susie Vaughn.

APDSS22 · February 2016

A friend of mine had a perfectly normal last name before she married. She took her husband's last name when they married. His last name is a common male first name and she works in a male dominated field. More people now think she's Male Last Name Female First Name if they haven't met her in person. Luckily my name is just ridiculously easy to misspell.

huskypuppy14 · February 2016

People are just dumb or lazy. Like Lynda I have a common name with a one letter spelling difference. In emails sometimes some people spell my name wrong all the time, even though I've worked with some of these people for over 5 years. I realize the more common spelling is their go to, but come on.

I have a scandanavian name so my lastname is a firstname +son, I have gotten the female version of my last name. So if my first name starts with Chris I'll get hi Christine. Ok? My first name begins with an L.

My name is not Laura but it's similar to Laura. I was called Laura in an email with this vendor for multiple emails, even though I would end the email with my actual name. Finally, after multiple emails of Hi Laura, blah blah blah, I bluntly had to say my name is not Laura, please make sure you address me correctly (if they sent me something it may go to my co worker instead of me, since her name was Laura).

It's actually a great way to weed out people or businesses if you are trying to decide between two people/companies etc.

geebee908 · February 2016

I've worked with a guy for years who is one of those people who is never wrong. He has always spelled my name with an extra letter in our correspondence, even though I've spelled it correctly for him on numerous occasions. Apparently, I'm not spelling my name correctly and should change it to his spelling.

kvruns · February 2016

MairePoppy said:

Marylynn? That's awful. Poor kid will never find a pencil or mug with that on it. @ShesSoCold

My name is Kelly - growing up there was always at least 1 other Kelly in the class (sometimes different spellings, but usually not). My college sorority had 3 Kellys, tennis team had 3 Kellys in HS and College, heck my first day at this job another Kelly and I started on the same day (with another Kelly already working here) and I can't find my damn name on the souvenir crap anymore.

You can definitely see how times and names have changes because you can find all of the current trendy names but the last few times I've looked no classic Kelly. Go figure.

lembaslover · February 2016

Well at least I'm not alone. I'm sure I'll get over it. I like the suggestions that I use it to weed out solicitors and lazy people! I also love the stories of people just getting called the blatant wrong name... I've always had easy to spell names but I can totally see how that would also be really frustrating too!

It has just been so strange to me since I'm always super careful in emails to make sure I use the correct name and spelling. Occasionally I have to work with people from Japan and they prefer to be addressed by Lastname-san and I always take the time to make sure I get it right.

Also I'm sorry you don't trust me now @ShesSoCold! I have to admit before changing my name I too thought it was weird to have a first name as a last name! I guess I didn't notice it with DH because he's a guy and it's a female last name.

vikinganna87 · February 2016

Slightly unrelated but on the topic of names:

The woman who had my job before me - I've never met her - did really well. Over the course of 6 years she went from being Laurie to Laura to L to Elle. Now I can understand being in a client-facing role and wanting to make things simple. But I'm like hell no would I change my name! It's like sacrificing your identity to please others. Anyone else think this is odd?

[Deleted User] · February 2016

I spell my name "wrong." Think Rebekah versus Rebecca. This year, at Christmas, I got a Christmas card from FH's aunt that had my name spelled wrong on the envelope. Fine, maybe she was writing quickly, it's just an address. But then it was misspelled in the card TOO. Fine, it's just his aunt. BUT we're facebook friends. Does she think I misspell my own name on my facebook profile? So annoying!

redwoodoriginal · February 2016

This year I got two holiday cards with my name written incorrectly by two friends. One I've been friends with for over ten years! And the other for more than 7... And at times in over the years we have been classified as best friends. Like, what? I threw those in the trash bc it irritated me so much lol

nerdwife · February 2016

adk19 said:

I spell my name "wrong." Think Rebekah versus Rebecca. This year, at Christmas, I got a Christmas card from FH's aunt that had my name spelled wrong on the envelope. Fine, maybe she was writing quickly, it's just an address. But then it was misspelled in the card TOO. Fine, it's just his aunt. BUT we're facebook friends. Does she think I misspell my own name on my facebook profile? So annoying!

Uh, my own grandparents frequently spell my name wrong. It's another case where it's a common name with a less common spelling. You'd think they'd know by now but, alas, no such luck.

Also, one of my mom's friend always spells it wrong on facebook. First of all, there's no need to right my name at all - it's clearly addressed to me. But if you are going to write it, can't you look at how it's spelled on the page you're on?!

lyndausvi · February 2016

My own father spelled my own name wrong. In his defense his admin at the time was Linda and he signed the card at work. I'm guessing at work it was an "i" and home it's "y".

I had some aunts who never spelled my or my sister's names correctly. Eventually I just took it as they just didn't care.

banana468 · February 2016

I'm named after my grandmothers. They each were called the same name but spelled them differently. I have my maternal grandmother's spelling. Dad frequently spelled my named as his mom did. I teased and said, "Dude - you NAMED ME. You just wrote a note to your mom."

My cousin spells her name "wrong". We had an aunt that was right about allthe things and she actually told my cousin's mom, "I monogrammed this baby cup but I saw that you spelled the name incorrectly so I fixed it for you."

[Deleted User] · February 2016

banana468 said:

I'm named after my grandmothers. They each were called the same name but spelled them differently. I have my maternal grandmother's spelling. Dad frequently spelled my named as his mom did. I teased and said, "Dude - you NAMED ME. You just wrote a note to your mom."

My cousin spells her name "wrong". We had an aunt that was right about allthe things and she actually told my cousin's mom, "I monogrammed this baby cup but I saw that you spelled the name incorrectly so I fixed it for you."

A monogram? I don't get it. Is your cousin, like, Alizabeth rather than Elizabeth? So the monogram would be changed? So the baby cup has an A or an E?

banana468 · February 2016

adk19 said:

banana468 said:

I'm named after my grandmothers. They each were called the same name but spelled them differently. I have my maternal grandmother's spelling. Dad frequently spelled my named as his mom did. I teased and said, "Dude - you NAMED ME. You just wrote a note to your mom."

My cousin spells her name "wrong". We had an aunt that was right about allthe things and she actually told my cousin's mom, "I monogrammed this baby cup but I saw that you spelled the name incorrectly so I fixed it for you."

A monogram? I don't get it. Is your cousin, like, Alizabeth rather than Elizabeth? So the monogram would be changed? So the baby cup has an A or an E?

Doh. I meant engraved with her name.

Evidently I am half asleep and words are hard.

Novak · February 2016

.

[Deleted User] · February 2016

banana468 said:

adk19 said:

banana468 said:

I'm named after my grandmothers. They each were called the same name but spelled them differently. I have my maternal grandmother's spelling. Dad frequently spelled my named as his mom did. I teased and said, "Dude - you NAMED ME. You just wrote a note to your mom."

My cousin spells her name "wrong". We had an aunt that was right about allthe things and she actually told my cousin's mom, "I monogrammed this baby cup but I saw that you spelled the name incorrectly so I fixed it for you."

A monogram? I don't get it. Is your cousin, like, Alizabeth rather than Elizabeth? So the monogram would be changed? So the baby cup has an A or an E?

Doh. I meant engraved with her name.

Evidently I am half asleep and words are hard.

But the name on the cup is "spelled correctly" and therefore not the name of the child, right? Because that's just messed up.

banana468 · February 2016

adk19 said:

banana468 said:

adk19 said:

banana468 said:

I'm named after my grandmothers. They each were called the same name but spelled them differently. I have my maternal grandmother's spelling. Dad frequently spelled my named as his mom did. I teased and said, "Dude - you NAMED ME. You just wrote a note to your mom."

My cousin spells her name "wrong". We had an aunt that was right about allthe things and she actually told my cousin's mom, "I monogrammed this baby cup but I saw that you spelled the name incorrectly so I fixed it for you."

A monogram? I don't get it. Is your cousin, like, Alizabeth rather than Elizabeth? So the monogram would be changed? So the baby cup has an A or an E?

Doh. I meant engraved with her name.

Evidently I am half asleep and words are hard.

But the name on the cup is "spelled correctly" and therefore not the name of the child, right? Because that's just messed up.

Exactly. My cousin is now in her 40s and we just roll our eyes that this family member did things "correctly" and forgot that maybe, just maybe there was another option.

Last name that could be a first name vent

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