Rehearsal Dinner questions

Re: Rehearsal Dinner questions

• madamerwin member

  

  March 2016

  banana468 said:

  Jen4948 said:

  She either needs to host the alcohol or find a different venue with the bar limited to what she wants to host.

  That isn't really possible in most places.   If the hosts say what's offered and the guests opt to get something that isn't hosted it's on them.
  
  Are you saying that if a couple hosts beer and wine only at a restaurant that has a bar then the bar needs to take out all the other alcohol for the night even if there are loads of other guests that aren't attending the RD?    
  
  I think the idea of a sign in the location of the RD makes far more sense.   The other option is for the staff to say, "The bride and groom are hosting the following wines and beers."

  I agree with this... It is unreasonable, if you are hosting an RD at a restaurant (as many couples do), to demand that the bar be cleared of anything that the hosts are not paying for. A sign saying what is hosted, in this case, would be completely reasonable.
  
  For my RD, we rented the banquet room at a restaurant and let everyone know beer and wine was on us. However, there was no way we could stop guests from leaving the banquet room, going to the main bar, and ordering whatever they wanted. Honestly, I cannot think of ANY restaurant (or really any other RD venue) where this is not the case.

  

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• thisismynickname2 member

  

  March 2016

  adk19 said:

  MaggieF1990 said:

  scribe95 said:

  Just a question since it's a restaurant - if she hosts beer and wine only the bar is still there and guests can walk right up to it and pay for whatever they want. So in this case I"m not sure how she can avoid that possibility either way.

  I was thinking the same thing. We are also doing our rehearsal dinner at a restaurant in a private room and are serving wine, but I don't see how anyone could avoid a guest going to the restaurant bar and buying a mixed drink if they felt inclined.

  You can put a sign in a frame "Please enjoy X Beer and X Wine as well as soft drinks, courtesy of the Bride and Groom".  Or put something similar on any printed menus you might have.  That way you're trying your darndest to host everything, but won't be stopping Uncle Larry from ordering and paying for a bourbon if he so chooses.  I mean, you tried.

  I was coming here to suggest this too. I have attended luncheons in private rooms with set menus for a variety of occasions like baptisms or showers. I remember one specifically saying "Unlimited non-alcoholic beverages and one margarita per guest is included." Fine by me. I'd rather know up front. 

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• Knottie66031159 member

  

  March 2016

  Personally, I feel there is no reason to offer an open bar for a rehearsal dinner..... You are likely having an open bar the next day at the wedding. It's an added cost for a smaller, and more intimate wedding event. I think you could do a few things here - Since it's a fixed menu with two paid for drinks, you can print out little menus for each plate or a larger one at the entrance (I'm picturing cute chalkboard menu/specials sign) and on them include something along the lines of "two glasses of wine included".... That should really be clear enough. Drink tickets are fine too. You can also ask how the restaurant typically goes about it. They should be well equipped with various options other brides have chosen.
  
  Our rehearsal dinner site is similar, and we have the option to purchase additional pitchers of sangria as the night goes on if we want more. 

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• crowsgirl15 member

  

  March 2016

  Knottie66031159 said:

  Personally, I feel there is no reason to offer an open bar for a rehearsal dinner..... You are likely having an open bar the next day at the wedding. It's an added cost for a smaller, and more intimate wedding event. I think you could do a few things here - Since it's a fixed menu with two paid for drinks, you can print out little menus for each plate or a larger one at the entrance (I'm picturing cute chalkboard menu/specials sign) and on them include something along the lines of "two glasses of wine included".... That should really be clear enough. Drink tickets are fine too. You can also ask how the restaurant typically goes about it. They should be well equipped with various options other brides have chosen.
  
  Our rehearsal dinner site is similar, and we have the option to purchase additional pitchers of sangria as the night goes on if we want more. 

  Whether it's a dinner party, a birthday party, a wedding, or a rehearsal dinner, when you host a party, you must host it completely.
  
  No one said you had to host a full open bar. They said you need to provide the same drinks for all your guests from the beginning to the end of the event, and they should never have to open their wallets. That is basic good hosting.

  
  
  

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• AddieCake member

  

  March 2016

  I've never seen a decorated rehearsal dinner space beyond the restaurant's usual decor. I think signs indicating what is hosted is a great idea. 

  What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14

  

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• Jen4948 member

  

  March 2016

  Signs would work fine - as long as you don't care if your guests purchase non-hosted alcohol with their own money.  But if you care about them not purchasing alcohol you're not hosting, then you need to use a venue that's not going to offer anything unhosted. If that's not possible, then you need to not care whether or not your guests buy their own drinks.
  

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