Moms and Maids

Little Vent

Our wedding is in 2 months, my MOH and FMIL just threw me the BEST shower I could imagine. I was really surprised! 
Here's my little rant: my mom and sister, who is a bridesmaid, treated my MOH and FMIL like crap. I only found out after the shower was over and heard a few friends who stuck around to help clean up and are always game for an "after party" talking about how rude my mom and sister were before I got there. I asked what they were talking about, and they filled me in on how my sister pretty much verbally ripped apart everything my MOH set up and planned for the day, and how my mom just sat with the rest of my side of the family and talked about how "sister's shower wasn't like this..." WTF.
I called my mom the next day to talk about what the problem was that they seemed to have, and she immediately started on about how the shower was at FMIL's house, not at a hall or restaurant, how MOH had a few "iffy" games that HAD to be vetoed, how sister would have done THIS, and when SHE had her shower planned it was pretty much everything sister told her MOH she expected.(I wasn't even in her wedding) 
Ummm, NO, mom. My shower WAS exactly what I wanted, it fit my personality and our theme for the wedding to a T. I am not a person who enjoys being the center of attention and get very anxious in large crowds, so MOH planned the event at a familiar place where she knew I'd feel most comfortable. The games we played were super cute (Purse Raid, Forbidden Words, and Guess Who-answers provided by FI)...I did hear about one of the games that got the kabosh, and I thought it would have been hilarious, had I known about it before the shower ended, we would have definitely played!
I feel horrible for the way my mom and sister acted, and MOH is such an amazing person. She isn't worried, even with the bachelorette coming up! (yes, I know when this is happening, but I don't know what we're doing!!) I have devised a plan to keep nay-sayers quiet...the reason MOH has this position is because she truly DOES know me best, and I think it irks my sister to know we just aren't that close. I know I can't make everyone get along, I just was hoping that adults could "adult" for a little while and not be whiny brats about things that aren't even about them. *Sigh* too much to ask....
spockforprezKnottie1452098987

Re: Little Vent

  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Definitely tell them their behavior was neither appreciated nor acceptable. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
    OurWildKingdomcharlotte989875
  • kimmiinthemittenkimmiinthemitten Detroit, MI member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Good for you for standing up to your sister.  It's sad they couldn't be gracious about a party that was thrown in your honor. Like @LondonLisasaid, behavior has consequences and if you choose to limit your time with spent with them, that's more than fair. 

    We we have a similar problem with FMIL and since FI called her out for her poor behavior they haven't spoken.  It's been a beautiful, peaceful 3 weeks! 

    What did sister say about not attending the bachelorette?
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    SP29OliveOilsMom
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    Tenth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I'm sorry your mom and sister behaved this way, and kudos to you for telling your sister to shape up or ship out with regards to your bachelorette party.

    Did you also tell your mother that her behavior was unacceptable?
    OurWildKingdom
  • TyvmTyvm member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer Name Dropper
    Congrats on successfully hitting the gym! It can be rough to keep up that routine.


    k thnx bye

  • You have a great attitude and bravo to you for not sinking to their level or letting them drag you down!

  • You have a big heart.  Maybe you're VERY different from your mom and you can see the beauty in what you are given.
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