Walking down the aisle

Knottie1432062667 · April 2016

I have been thinking about having both my parents walk me down the aisle. I like the idea of honoring both of them. My fiance disagrees and thinks that just my dad should walk me down the aisle. He says that this is a moment that my dad has probably been dreaming of ever since I was born and that if we have a daughter he would want to spend this special moment with her alone. I had not thought of it this way before. I am struggling with how to make this decision. I never had any idea this would be something that is important to my fiance.

100yroldblinddog · April 2016

I think you should check with your dad and see if he has any strong feelings on the matter, considering it involves him and not so much your FI. It's perfectly reasonable to want both parents to walk you down the aisle!

CMGragain · April 2016

Knottie1432062667 said:

I have been thinking about having both my parents walk me down the aisle. I like the idea of honoring both of them. My fiance disagrees and thinks that just my dad should walk me down the aisle. He says that this is a moment that my dad has probably been dreaming of ever since I was born and that if we have a daughter he would want to spend this special moment with her alone. I had not thought of it this way before. I am struggling with how to make this decision. I never had any idea this would be something that is important to my fiance.

It can be important to your fiance if and when he walks HIS daughter down the aisle. This is not his choice; it is yours. Talk to your Dad before deciding this.
In Jewish families it is traditional for both parents to walk the bride down the aisle.

londinium215 · April 2016

I'm having both my parents walk me down the aisle - like @CMGragain said, it's a Jewish tradition. Even if it wasn't, I'd probably still want them both, it never felt right to me to just honour my dad that way and leave my mom sitting in the front row.

The important thing is that you do what feels right for you and your parents.

charlotte989875 · April 2016

I wish I had asked both parents to walk me. I'm not super close with my dad, but I'm closer with my mom.

Have you told your FI why you want to do this? I'd think this is a decision you get to make for yourself.

[Deleted User] · April 2016

This has zero to do with your fiance. You get to make this decision. This, and your dress, are pretty much the only things that are Your decision and your decision ALONE. "Fiance, thank you for your opinion. However, I have made my decision, and I am going to walk down the aisle escorted by both my parents."

CMGragain · April 2016

I AM a grandmother, though far from having grandchildren old enough to get married. I wouldn't like it. I want to sit quietly in my seat, wearing my beautiful dress and corsage, and enjoy myself.

[Deleted User] · April 2016

CMGragain said:

I AM a grandmother, though far from having grandchildren old enough to get married. I wouldn't like it. I want to sit quietly in my seat, wearing my beautiful dress and corsage, and enjoy myself.

CMGr, You're posting the right response on the wrong thread.

SP29 · April 2016

Who walks you down the aisle is a decision that is entirely yours to make. This part is about you, not your FI.

While I would tell your dad, when you ask him to walk you, "I would like both you and mom to walk me down the aisle", while he may accept or decline, I also do not think he is entitled to say, "No, only *I* get to walk with you".

flantastic · April 2016

Your FI should butt out, as this has nothing to do with him.

I also think it would be selfish and a little silly of your dad to decline walking with both you and your mom. I did have both my parents walk me down the aisle, and my dad was very cool with it because, well, he realizes that they're both equally parental to me. He still got to do a father-daughter dance anyway.

tigerlily6 · April 2016

Yeah, as one PP noted, your FI's opinion on this is only relevant if and when you have a daughter who gets married and is considering who to walk her down the aisle.

Pick whomever you want to escort you, whether that is just your dad or just your mom or both parents. It's about your personal relationship with them, not how people (including your FI) perceive things.

MobKaz · April 2016

I am in agreement with all PP's. If you choose to walk up the aisle with both parents, you can remind your FI that your dad will still have a "special moment" during the father/daughter dance (if you choose to do so).

I think it is wonderful that you want to share this special moment with both your parents.

CMGragain · April 2016

adk19 said:

CMGragain said:

I AM a grandmother, though far from having grandchildren old enough to get married. I wouldn't like it. I want to sit quietly in my seat, wearing my beautiful dress and corsage, and enjoy myself.

CMGr, You're posting the right response on the wrong thread.

Sorry! My eyesight has been weird lately.

Casadena · May 2016

You might want to talk to your parents about this first. I never imagined she would, but my mother had very strong feelings about NOT being involved in that because she felt that it should be only my father (he was very excited about doing it too, that wasn't an issue).

It has nothing to do with your FI, but your parents may have different responses than you expect, so check with them and don't "expect" or plan anything until you do!

Walking down the aisle

Re: Walking down the aisle

Choose Another Board

Search Boards