BP Helping with DIY

DrillSergeantCat · June 2016

I have seen several times that it's not the job of the BP to help me with my projects and I've never had an inkling to even ask them to help. However, I have one that asks weekly what she can help with. So far I've turned her down just because I don't have anything I need help with, but is it really wrong of me to accept her offer of help?

kaos16 · June 2016

If she is offering, I don't see anything wrong with accepting help.

OurWildKingdom · June 2016

kaos16 said:

If she is offering, I don't see anything wrong with accepting help.

Nor do I, but make it fun. Cook for her or order takeaway or go for coffee or drinks after (and pick up her tab).

MobKaz · June 2016

DrillSergeantCat said:

I have seen several times that it's not the job of the BP to help me with my projects and I've never had an inkling to even ask them to help. However, I have one that asks weekly what she can help with. So far I've turned her down just because I don't have anything I need help with, but is it really wrong of me to accept her offer of help?

Will you need help with anything in the future? I think the fact that your friend asks frequently, I would say her offer is sincere. Does she have a particular DIY skill or talent? If she does and it lends itself to a future project, I don't see why it would be wrong to say, "I will be doing XXX in the next month. If you have the time and the interest then, I can call you when I start."

The one area I don't think I would accept help is with "day of" assistance.

levioosa · June 2016

If she is routinely offers, you can take her up on it, but you can't ask anyone to do the work, if that makes sense. I would make it fun as well. The next time she asks, you can say, "Sure! Do you want to make it a wine and movie night while we stuff envelopes?"

And ditto not accepting help on the day of.

crowsgirl15 · June 2016

I would definitely take her up on it! My best friend got married last year, and I loved helping her with projects. However, I always offered, and she never asked. She also turned me down a couple times if it was something she wanted to do alone. I don't think there's anything wrong with the BP helping, just with you initiating the request, so you're in the clear!

lnixon8 · June 2016

Ditto PPs but if you're picky or a perfectionist best to do it yourself/hire someone (ie if you dont like your friends handwriting, and are particular about escort cards, don't ask her)

oywiththepoodles · June 2016

Yes, if there is something you would appreciate her help with, I think it is perfectly fine to accept!

There are some people who honestly, legitimately enjoy these types of things (random crafty projects, etc.) - I'm one of those people, where hanging out with a friend doing a DIY project for someone's wedding an ordering a pizza would be my idea of a great evening (call me weird...

).

As others have noted, I think the key is to just stick with folks who have offered, and make sure it is a task that you aren't too particular about.

OurWildKingdom · June 2016

oywiththepoodles said:

Yes, if there is something you would appreciate her help with, I think it is perfectly fine to accept!

There are some people who honestly, legitimately enjoy these types of things (random crafty projects, etc.) - I'm one of those people, where hanging out with a friend doing a DIY project for someone's wedding an ordering a pizza would be my idea of a great evening (call me weird... ).

As others have noted, I think the key is to just stick with folks who have offered, and make sure it is a task that you aren't too particular about.

I'm one of those weirdos too, although I would enjoy Chinese as much as I would enjoy pizza.

MesmrEwe · June 2016

OurWildKingdom said:

oywiththepoodles said:

Yes, if there is something you would appreciate her help with, I think it is perfectly fine to accept!

There are some people who honestly, legitimately enjoy these types of things (random crafty projects, etc.) - I'm one of those people, where hanging out with a friend doing a DIY project for someone's wedding an ordering a pizza would be my idea of a great evening (call me weird... ).

As others have noted, I think the key is to just stick with folks who have offered, and make sure it is a task that you aren't too particular about.

I'm one of those weirdos too, although I would enjoy Chinese as much as I would enjoy pizza.

Same here - Chinese or Pizza - BONUS!!!!

AddieCake · June 2016

One of my bridesmaids constantly offered to help or to attend things with me. When I wanted company or had stuff someone could help with, I took her up on it.

thisismynickname2 · June 2016

lnixon8 said:

Ditto PPs but if you're picky or a perfectionist best to do it yourself/hire someone (ie if you dont like your friends handwriting, and are particular about escort cards, don't ask her)

SO MUCH THIS.
I was asked to be part of a bride's DIY invitation assembly line and you could tell she was bristling every time a bow wasn't perfectly straight. Those tiny-ass bows were a bitch to tie. She was too polite to say anything or re-do our work but you could just tell... She's a lovely person, had a small budget, so we were happy to help, but geez. LOL.

drglitter · June 2016

thisismynickname said:

lnixon8 said:

Ditto PPs but if you're picky or a perfectionist best to do it yourself/hire someone (ie if you dont like your friends handwriting, and are particular about escort cards, don't ask her)

SO MUCH THIS.
I was asked to be part of a bride's DIY invitation assembly line and you could tell she was bristling every time a bow wasn't perfectly straight. Those tiny-ass bows were a bitch to tie. She was too polite to say anything or re-do our work but you could just tell... She's a lovely person, had a small budget, so we were happy to help, but geez. LOL.

My sister was exactly the same, only she did re-do our work, in front of us. I think you're fine to accept offered help, or company while you work, but I agree that if you're a perfectionist, just say no thank you.

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