We got engaged in January and have three years left in undergrad. When we get married, I will be 21 and he will be 22 with a semester left. The initial response to the engagement from my mother was not good at all. She still wants me to be her baby and I understand that, but it really hurt not having her full support. Over the past six months, she has gotten a lot better and more supportive, but I still don't feel comfortable discussing wedding planning around her or other family members. I don't feel like anyone around us thinks our engagement is legitimate. Our close friends are thrilled, but family... it's taking them a while to warm up to the idea.
We have been together for over five years, so it was no surprise to them that it was happening, just that it was happening "so soon" and "so young." I have been a mother figure to my brother because my mom was and still is single, and I had to help out. I am currently paying for all of my college and living expenses on my own. People have said some of the rudest things months before we got engaged. "When you go off to college, you're going to find someone you like more." "Don't set your heart on this one because you may find someone better." Excuse me? I didn't realize that was how relationships worked.
He was a pallbearer at my grandfather's funeral. I went and stayed with him and his grandparents multiple times when my father and brother got into physical fights and scared the hell out of me. A good eight months (total) of our relationship was spent long distance. He lived in Germany during the summers to see his mother and step father (who was in the Air Force and has since retired and moved back to the states). We now have an apartment together and are enjoying our internships and college experiences, together. I couldn't be happier. When someone asks when we are planning on getting married and a family
member is around, they freeze up and say "let's not talk about that just
yet." On one hand I am thinking "who cares, our opinions are the only ones that matter" and have gained a lot more self confidence over the past year, but on the other a part of me wants to feel like my family is excited for me. It is putting a wrench in our planning because I want them to be a part of it, but they aren't willing to be serious. I shouldn't have to feel silly or fake when someone refers to me as a bride, which is what I am.
Is that too much to ask?