Wedding Woes

SIL is skipping my shower to go to a yearly beer festival..... and I get to watch her dog

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Re: SIL is skipping my shower to go to a yearly beer festival..... and I get to watch her dog

  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited July 2016
    We have watched the dog on one other occasion two years ago. Its obviously not a big deal and it was a mistake making this post. I was under the impression that this was a place to vent wedding frustration. I apologize for wasting all your time. 
    ::sigh::

    When you post on a public message board, you are not shouting into a void.  If you want to post without feedback, create a private blog with a password and turn off the comments.  No one owes you validation and there is no 'sisterhood' of the vag. 
    @mrs.conn23 what, you haven't been invited to join? ;-)
  • VarunaTT said:
    Don't invite @mrs.conn!  She has WAY too many problems!

     I want in!
  • We have watched the dog on one other occasion two years ago. Its obviously not a big deal and it was a mistake making this post. I was under the impression that this was a place to vent wedding frustration. I apologize for wasting all your time. 
    ::sigh::

    When you post on a public message board, you are not shouting into a void.  If you want to post without feedback, create a private blog with a password and turn off the comments.  No one owes you validation and there is no 'sisterhood' of the vag. 
    Yeah at least it was a bit of a twist on the tired "aren't we all here to support each other as stressed out brides-to-be?!". 

    OP, my FSIL isn't coming to my hen do. She is coming to my wedding. I assume I will make it through this difficult situation without it ruining our relationship for the rest of our lives.
                 
  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited July 2016
    @YogaSandy - your MIL sounds like a reasonable human being. 
    YogaSandy said:

    A few years ago, I actually went to a marathon in Malibu (huge deal as I'm from Canada). It was on MIL's birthday. I missed her party and she had to watch my cats as DH was away for work. She knew it wasn't a slight against her. And she had no problem feeding our cats. 


    My mother and sister didn't attend my wedding shower, and I've somehow managed to get married, stay married for almost 10 years, and have a good relationship with mom and sis despite that.

    MIL hosted in Philly (where ILs live, and we lived at the time). Mom and sister live in Pittsburgh which is like 300 miles away (5-6 hour drive each way). I didn't see any reason for them to drive across the state and spend money on a hotel for a 3-4 hour party. My sister was also a college student at the time and I didn't want to interrupt her school schedule more than necessary. 
  • MesmrEweMesmrEwe member
    First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited July 2016

    The real issue here is "How do I deal with FI who didn't consider logistics for one second in agreeing to watch the dog on the day of my bridal shower, which means he expects ME to be watching the <verbiage> dog because that's what actually happened the last time"...  The answer - communication!  Your FI needs to be told in clear terms "I'm going to be enjoying my bridal shower on Saturday, not taking care of someone else's pet.  You're on doggie duty, NOT ME!  In the future, please run this type of thing by me before you agree that WE will be taking care of someone else's pet!"...  As for Beerfest being more important than your shower, NBD. 

  • If I went to your shower I'd be thrilled if you brought the dog!


  • OP, you have every right to feel any way you want. The problem would be acting on it. I hope that you enjoyed your shower and realized that it was probably better that SIL wasn't there and it was just those that you are really close to.

    I think weddings bring out the crazy in all of us. I think venting is good but a online forum is often not the best place to do it unless you are okay with people providing advice that may not jive with your thoughts.

    For the dog situation, it might be good to have a discussion with FI about running by each other future houseguests before agreeing to it. Although it could be possible, I highly doubt that SIL said to BIL ... "I've declined the shower, now let's dump the dog at bride's house". It was probably BIL thinking that you guys have dog sat before and he was in charge of finding someone to do it ... and you were asked.

  • Was just thinking - I wonder if the Beer Fest is part of the Super Trooper's 2 promo tour?!?!?!  In which case - definitely would trump a bridal shower... 

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