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Ladies, don't put your vision ahead of your guests!

ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic member
Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Yesterday, we attended a wedding where the "cocktail" hour had no food and a cash bar. REALLY???? Actually the cash bar wasn't a huge surprise given all the other things that have happened surrounding this wedding, but seriously no food? There were many other things that we side eyed, but these are the things that affected our comfort during the reception.Of course, they couldn't afford apps and open bar because they HAD to have the reception at this venue.  AND I saw pictures on FB of another friend's wedding that was held outside in the rain. The B&G had an umbrella but the guests, WP did not.! nopenopenope! Do not do that to your guests. Their reception was under a tent so I don't know why they couldn't have had the tent as a Plan B in case of rain, but of course -vision!

OK rant over!
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Re: Ladies, don't put your vision ahead of your guests!

  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    I would have left that reception before it began.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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  • justsiejustsie member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    And gents. This statement applies to grooms as well!
    image
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  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    justsie said:
    And gents. This statement applies to grooms as well!
    Most definitely! I realized that after I posted but just didn't go back to change it. I guess most of the posters I read on here are women so that was why I did it. Certainly didn't mean the guys shouldn't be aware too.

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  • kvrunskvruns member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    I'm focusing on the rain wedding. I think you're in IN too (or maybe I imagined it). It rained all damn weekend except for part of Sunday afternoon. no way in hell I'm sitting outside in the rain wtf
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    From time to time I read about outdoor weddings proceeding even if it rains.  Am I the only person who would say no to that?  If I was a guest, I would wait it out in my car.
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    kmmssg said:
    From time to time I read about outdoor weddings proceeding even if it rains.  Am I the only person who would say no to that?  If I was a guest, I would wait it out in my car.
    The only way I'd see going through with it is if it's just a drizzle and short.  Otherwise I think we would need to share parents for me to do that - and then I'd still be pissed. 
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  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    kmmssg said:
    From time to time I read about outdoor weddings proceeding even if it rains.  Am I the only person who would say no to that?  If I was a guest, I would wait it out in my car.
    I stood (no chairs) in the muck for an outdoor garden wedding, once. We would have left, but the FOG is my husband's best friend. He was embarrassed and stood beside me holding a huge umbrella over me. The bride with the vision, was trying to wait out the storm in a nearby bar, as her groom and her guests got soaked. I just didn't like her after that. The marriage lasted about two years so no reason to have any contact with her anyway. 

    Last week that FOG passed away, unexpectedly. For whatever it's worth, I'm glad we stood beside him and his wife that day. But I wouldn't do it for anyone else.
                       
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  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    SP29 said:
    There are a lot of faux pas I will put up with, but no food is not one of them!

    What's the point of a cocktail hour if there aren't cocktails and nibbles?
    To make a long story short, my sister got on my case about food at my wedding. I was all like, "Of course there's food at cocktail hour." Turns out she was expecting there not to be because weddings she'd attended didn't have food at cocktail hour. And she was sure cranky about it. 
    Yeesh.

    I'd be fine with a drizzle (happened once) but if it started pouring I'd probably head indoors. I'm Always Prepared and might do the ceremony with the gigantic umbrella I'd be sure to have brought with me if rain was in the forecast for a hypothetical outdoor wedding. 
    ________________________________


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  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    MairePoppy said:
    show previous quotes
    I stood (no chairs) in the muck for an outdoor garden wedding, once. We would have left, but the FOG is my husband's best friend. He was embarrassed and stood beside me holding a huge umbrella over me. The bride with the vision, was trying to wait out the storm in a nearby bar, as her groom and her guests got soaked. I just didn't like her after that. The marriage lasted about two years so no reason to have any contact with her anyway. 

    Last week that FOG passed away, unexpectedly. For whatever it's worth, I'm glad we stood beside him and his wife that day. But I wouldn't do it for anyone else.
    This is why we stayed at the reception even though there was no  food or open bar. We were not invited to the outdoor wedding - just saw pictures. I wouldn't have sat in the rain.
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  • twitterbirdtwitterbird member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Love Its

    It would have to be a pretty close friend for me to sit in the rain and watch them get married. Like best friend level friend.


    So for my cocktail hour I had arranged some cracker, cheese, meat, fruit trays. We picked them up at a local grocery store and asked the caterer to put them out at the appointed time. They said no problem. Found out much later in the evening that they never put out the trays. I was mortified. Of course they also left and neglected to cut up the cake (my best friend's husband took care of it after).

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  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    edited August 2016
    Oh no, that stinks, @twitterbird!
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  • MesmrEweMesmrEwe member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    twitterbird said:

    It would have to be a pretty close friend for me to sit in the rain and watch them get married. Like best friend level friend.


    So for my cocktail hour I had arranged some cracker, cheese, meat, fruit trays. We picked them up at a local grocery store and asked the caterer to put them out at the appointed time. They said no problem. Found out much later in the evening that they never put out the trays. I was mortified. Of course they also left and neglected to cut up the cake (my best friend's husband took care of it after).


    Hopefully they didn't charge you for a cutting they never did!  Some caterers just are - yea - ...
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