Dear Prudence,
I am a straight, single woman. On Friday night, I had sex with a man I’ve had a loose friendship with for about a year and had been hanging out with more often in the last month. It was terrible. I never felt unsafe or violated, but this guy who has been generous and empathetic in all other contexts was way off the mark in bed. Maybe he has limited experience, watches a lot of terrible porn, gets bad advice ... who knows! Every time I said no or redirected he apologized and stopped and seemed embarrassed. He wants to hang out again and I think I need to break things off—what level of explanation do I offer? Do I owe it to him and the women who come next to let him know that his understanding of female anatomy is incorrect and his approach is riddled with misogyny? I don’t think he’s a jerk and I believe he could be a great partner to someone if he does some homework, but I also don’t know if it’s cruel to point out someone’s sexual illiteracy as a reason for wanting to go our separate ways.