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Wedding Etiquette Forum
MCmeow
member
Plus ones for wedding party
Hey, so I'm not sure what the general consensus is with this. We're on a tight budget so we're not giving plus one's to truly single guests. I did add plus ones to single wedding party members but my fiance doesn't like that idea. He doesn't like the idea of bringing strangers into the wedding and that they'll be alone during the ceremony and cocktail hour (We're both antisocial, so that would be a nightmare for us, but probably not for others).
Anyway, the only two single members on my side is my brother (Who of course knows everyone there), and my best friend (I've added her family to the invite and she knows my entire family and our group of friends is invited). Would you side eye them not getting a plus one? This seems like a gray area for me but I'm new to weddings so no clue...
Edit: the reasoning wouldn't just be my fiance's reasoning (Personally I think it's silly because most people aren't anti-social) but it would help us budget wise, if we can cut costs in any way without offending people.
Anyway, the only two single members on my side is my brother (Who of course knows everyone there), and my best friend (I've added her family to the invite and she knows my entire family and our group of friends is invited). Would you side eye them not getting a plus one? This seems like a gray area for me but I'm new to weddings so no clue...
Edit: the reasoning wouldn't just be my fiance's reasoning (Personally I think it's silly because most people aren't anti-social) but it would help us budget wise, if we can cut costs in any way without offending people.
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Re: Plus ones for wedding party
We we did this and the truly single guests in the WP didn't choose to bring anyone, but I wanted them to feel comfortable doing so if they wanted.
So there are two people on your side that are single, what about your FH's side. We are talking about a handful of extra people, I don't see how that would break the bank.
P.S: were your grooms also etiquette challenged? Ha, I mean I know most dudes aren't into researching wedding stuff so it can be frustrating but at least he's willing to learn when I learn. For a long time he was convinced it's ok to only invite one half of a married couple.
2 people shouldn't break the bank. And if they do really know a lot of other people, they may not wish to bring a plus one anyway.
I would think this would be especially true for the wedding party, for all the reasons you mention.
But coincidentally my best friend just told me this morning she's "talking" to a guy. Which makes me really happy for her, and would make this plus one situation a lot more clear whether or not something comes of it.
Not sure when you wedding is, but if it's far out just add a plus one just in case they are in a relationship by the time your wedding rolls around.
Or you know, you could invite these two dates along with you to take the damn pictures so they aren't alone among strangers!
I'd offer them Plus Ones. As others have said, they may actually be in relationships by the time your wedding rolls around anyways.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
Formerly martha1818
Girl. No. Just no.
How about the person said that the relationship exists. Because unless it's your relationship, it's not about what you consider long term. Once the person in the relationship tells you that it matters that's all the information you need. To do otherwise essentially tells your friends that you have better judgement than they do. And well, by saying that you proved you don't.
You are wrong.
If you look up "fair" in the dictionary, the definition is exactly this "NOT shitting on your friends' relationships while asking then to take an entire day to celebrate your relationship".
Are there any guests invited to your wedding who have been in....say....a 2 month relationship? Or is it all long relationships vs. single and dating. I think we may be getting into semantics here and arguing over nothing.
I understand. I had a small wedding - 31 guests.
Had I only invited people I knew personally, I would have excluded my husband's grandmother.
Had I invited partners I approved of and exceeded six months only, I would have excluded the best man's now wife.
Had I assumed no one would care if they were not given a guest, my own grandmother wouldn't have come.
My point is that just because it's your wedding day, you don't get to treat people like shit.
And you can pretend not to care what your single friends do, but your posts reek of judgment and it's disgusting. Obviously you think you're better than them, but the least you could do is pretend not to be so superior and arrogant and give them a damn guest if they want.