Wedding Party

I Found an Inexpensive Robe Site

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Re: I Found an Inexpensive Robe Site



  • WOW, thanks OP. I have been looking for robes since my BMs specifically noted how cute the ones we saw at DB were and how they would rather wear one of these than a flannel shirt to get ready in (I posed both options). 
    LOL. How nice of you to give them TWO options of a getting ready outfit! 

    Here's a crazy idea - why don't you just let people wear whatever the hell they want while they get ready?? 
    Why does "getting ready together" even have to be a thing? 

    I don't get together with my friends specifically to get dressed and do makeup together in the same room before we all go out to dinner or before any other social party. 

    Time to let this photo op trend die, imo.



    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • Can I be devil's advocate for a minute here?

    I'm not doing robes.  It's not something I care to spend money on.  But I fail to see what is So Super Duper Uniquely Awful and Not Okay about robes.  They are not underwear. Definitionally, since you don't wear anything over a robe.  

    Now, there are robes that I wouldn't want to wear or be photographed in. Something like this springs to mind:

    If a bride asked her bridesmaids to wear this while getting ready, that would be absurd.  But that is not the sort of robe we are talking about here.  Getting-ready robes tend to be something like this:


    Not sexualized.  Not scandalous.  Just clothes.  How is the above image So Super Duper Uniquely Awful and Not Okay while the dress below is a perfectly valid choice for bridesmaids' attire?

      
    Both have a tie closure and a belt.  Both have a neckline that forms a V. Both hit a bit above the knee, although the robes are a bit longer than the dress.  The robes actually leave the wearer considerably more covered up, between the slightly longer hemline and the presence of sleeves compared to the sleeveless dress.

    I don't see the need for robes, but I can't quite understand the vitriol either.
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  • I am the OP and I don't plan to respond to anything any longer or specifically but I'm not a vendor and I didn't make other accounts to support myself? That's a rather paranoid thought. It's so unbelievable that ANYONE would possibly find this post helpful? 

    I don't care if you are using robes. I posted this to help people who are using robes. I didn't mean to bother anyone with it at all; my SOLE intention was to be helpful. I'm sorry some of you don't find it helpful. 

    I don't understand why people selectively choose what to read from posts and almost always assume whatever wasn't written. As I said before, I'm not even giving them as their gift, it's just something extra that I do in fact know that they want. They discussed getting robes to get ready in and I simply decided to cover the cost of that. I don't plan to force anyone to wear anything. You don't know what kind of bride I am or what kinds of "choices" I give them. I wanted them to choose their own shoes and dresses, changed my date to suit individual needs, asked for their individual budgets (anonymous submission), and more. And because I want to buy them something so that they won't have to buy it themselves, I'm controlling them and playing dress up? That's absurd. I am so glad you all think of what your own friends would and wouldn't like. That is a great thing to do and I say that with no sarcasm. I am doing the same thing. My friends are clearly just different than yours. 

    Again, I just wanted to be helpful. If you can use this information, I'm so glad. 
  • And also, my photographer won't even be there for us getting ready, I'm not getting robes for pictures. It's just something to get ready in. That's what I mean, about people reading what others write and then filling in the rest with their own imagination. Many of you assumed I intended to "play dress up" with my bridesmaids and have them do so for my pictures, and that isn't the case at all for me. 
  • drunkenwitchdrunkenwitch member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited December 2016
    The only robe I wear is my fluffy soft warm TARDIS robe (which matches my TARDIS slippers), BF bought it for me because he wanted his big soft fluffy bathrobe back (I am always cold, so I steal his warm things). his robe was too big, this robe fits me perfectly.  Any other robe would end up in the donation pile.

  • Can I be devil's advocate for a minute here?

    I'm not doing robes.  It's not something I care to spend money on.  But I fail to see what is So Super Duper Uniquely Awful and Not Okay about robes.  They are not underwear. Definitionally, since you don't wear anything over a robe.  

    Now, there are robes that I wouldn't want to wear or be photographed in. Something like this springs to mind:

    If a bride asked her bridesmaids to wear this while getting ready, that would be absurd.  But that is not the sort of robe we are talking about here.  Getting-ready robes tend to be something like this:


    Not sexualized.  Not scandalous.  Just clothes.  How is the above image So Super Duper Uniquely Awful and Not Okay while the dress below is a perfectly valid choice for bridesmaids' attire?

      
    Both have a tie closure and a belt.  Both have a neckline that forms a V. Both hit a bit above the knee, although the robes are a bit longer than the dress.  The robes actually leave the wearer considerably more covered up, between the slightly longer hemline and the presence of sleeves compared to the sleeveless dress.

    I don't see the need for robes, but I can't quite understand the vitriol either.
    I wouldn't be wearing either the robe or the dress.  I don't wear above the knee dresses and I don't take pictures in my underwear, covered by just a robe.



  • This is actually one of my favorite pictures from my wedding. I do have it printed and hanging in my house and I honestly don't think it would be enhanced by having us all wearing the same thing. Everyone is happy, they're comfortable, having a good time. You don't need robes for great pictures with your closest friends and family. 

    I can just feel the excitement and joy in that photo! 

    Some of my most genuine photos came from the Suite we were in while we were getting ready.  There were various states of people in button downs, tee shirts, and dresses, but everyone was comfortable so the faces were all fun and carefree.  (I also had my BMs pick any dress in a color, to aid in their comfort on the wedding day.)  My least favorite photos are the ones that we staged and posed a specific way.  Sure they were the classics but they just don't pull me in like the ones where she said "now strike a pose and have some fun!"  Those are the one's we have displayed in our home.

  • On the rare occasion I'm in a robe and someone other than my H is around.  Like I'm answering the door to get my UPS package.  One hand is firmly clasped at the opening for my boobage section and the other is quickly twisting the bottom half of the robe so the opening is more in the "thigh" area.  And I still make sure it is closed before answering.  Then walk in a small shuffling motion to keep it that way.

    With that said, if I was a BM and the bride wanted pics with us in matchy-matchy robes.  I'd be fine with that as long as I could wear something under it.  But I probably wouldn't keep it.  My idea of a good robe is thick and fluffy.  It seems like most BM robes are thin and with a sheen.

    If the OP is still around, now that you have explained more, if your BMs expressed an interest in robes, great.  If you don't mind spending the money and is an "extra" not a gift...and also don't mind if they choose not to wear the robes...that's fine also.

    However, I think your misstep was linking to a site in one of your first posts.  Until you came back and made another post, I had totally assumed you were a vendor.  Which isn't allowed, but that doesn't mean vendor affiliates don't try to "sneak" them in.  We see it all the time.  So it wasn't crazy for PPs to jump to that conclusion.

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  • It was the way that it was responded to, which was extremely rude. I found this post extremely helpful, and very thoughtful. 
  • I just read through the rest of these comments, and it really makes me want to find another bridal/wedding site for help. I've found so many rude people responding to comments. If you're not interested in robes, don't click on the post to leave a nasty comment trying to make someone feel bad. Wedding planning is already stressful enough without some rando over the internet talking bad about a gift someone is giving. It's alright to guide someone into a better option or direction, but the way it was/has been responded to is pretty distasteful. Also, I LOVE the robe idea. If you want your bridesmaids to wear matching robes for your wedding.. DO IT! I've had to do some things I wasn't over the moon for for other weddings I was in, but didn't mind. I was there to help make the brides day perfect. 
  • @Knottie1470954238 I understand where you are coming from. I've definitely felt that way many times here! However, I have learned it's better just to ignore anything I perceive as negative or rude and just take the positives. I usually follow that advice, but sometimes it's hard! 

    Other websites are the same though. I tried that exact thing! It was not any more pleasant anywhere else. You can get good help here. My advice is that when someone is what you might consider rude, leave it, come back to it later and respond then with a clear head or not at all. You'll be able to pull out the good stuff from their comments that usually is helpful without feeling bothered by the way they said it. It's hard to do at first, but it gets easier! Plus you'll learn what information to include in your next post so that people won't jump down your throat with their assumptions right away. 

    I'm really glad you found this useful! Hope you are able to use it for your wedding. 
  • Heffalump said:
    I just read through the rest of these comments, and it really makes me want to find another bridal/wedding site for help. I've found so many rude people responding to comments. If you're not interested in robes, don't click on the post to leave a nasty comment trying to make someone feel bad. Wedding planning is already stressful enough without some rando over the internet talking bad about a gift someone is giving. It's alright to guide someone into a better option or direction, but the way it was/has been responded to is pretty distasteful. Also, I LOVE the robe idea. If you want your bridesmaids to wear matching robes for your wedding.. DO IT! I've had to do some things I wasn't over the moon for for other weddings I was in, but didn't mind. I was there to help make the brides day perfect. 


    No one was nasty or trying to make anyone feel bad.  People were pointing out actual issues with robes.  From personal experience. 

    I think you're overly invested in this idea.  It's your life, and no one is going to come through the computer and take your robes away.  But it's curious that >90% of posters cited reasons why they would prefer not to wear robes to get ready, and you think they are the mean ones...not the brides who are choosing to make their closest friends uncomfortable for capital-P Pictures.

    And that last sentence, in bold?  Just...no.  The wedding party is there to be honored as the bride and groom's closest friends and/or family, not as some sort of helper monkeys. 

    I was in a womans BP once where she treated us as just this...helper monkeys.  She arranged dates to "hang out" only to have us cut out invitations and stuff envelopes.  Then on the wedding day she proclaims to her sister (and MOH) that my other friend and I were "only there because [Groom] was supposed to ask his other two friends and didn't"  It was said in front of us and then followed by a "haha j/k"...We are no longer friends.

    It was that specific experience that brought me back to the boards to prevent others from doing the same thing!  I miss that friend from time to time but I just couldn't get passed the fact that she thought I was a slave and a prop.  (There were other incidents also, but this was the "nail in the coffin").  So if people on here are telling you something is a bad idea, it is very likely a bad idea!

  • Heffalump said:
    I just read through the rest of these comments, and it really makes me want to find another bridal/wedding site for help. I've found so many rude people responding to comments. If you're not interested in robes, don't click on the post to leave a nasty comment trying to make someone feel bad. Wedding planning is already stressful enough without some rando over the internet talking bad about a gift someone is giving. It's alright to guide someone into a better option or direction, but the way it was/has been responded to is pretty distasteful. Also, I LOVE the robe idea. If you want your bridesmaids to wear matching robes for your wedding.. DO IT! I've had to do some things I wasn't over the moon for for other weddings I was in, but didn't mind. I was there to help make the brides day perfect. 


    No one was nasty or trying to make anyone feel bad.  People were pointing out actual issues with robes.  From personal experience. 

    I think you're overly invested in this idea.  It's your life, and no one is going to come through the computer and take your robes away.  But it's curious that >90% of posters cited reasons why they would prefer not to wear robes to get ready, and you think they are the mean ones...not the brides who are choosing to make their closest friends uncomfortable for capital-P Pictures.

    And that last sentence, in bold?  Just...no.  The wedding party is there to be honored as the bride and groom's closest friends and/or family, not as some sort of helper monkeys. 

    I was in a womans BP once where she treated us as just this...helper monkeys.  She arranged dates to "hang out" only to have us cut out invitations and stuff envelopes.  Then on the wedding day she proclaims to her sister (and MOH) that my other friend and I were "only there because [Groom] was supposed to ask his other two friends and didn't"  It was said in front of us and then followed by a "haha j/k"...We are no longer friends.

    It was that specific experience that brought me back to the boards to prevent others from doing the same thing!  I miss that friend from time to time but I just couldn't get passed the fact that she thought I was a slave and a prop.  (There were other incidents also, but this was the "nail in the coffin").  So if people on here are telling you something is a bad idea, it is very likely a bad idea!

    Good gawd some people ....
    My wedding party offered to come help with anything we needed/wanted to do {which is completely different} and there were some last minute things I asked if they could help with - things that I figured would be done before that time.

    But I never once expected them to do it! I didn't even ask my mum or MIL to help with things.
  • Devil's advocate moment - let's pretend that the WP is cool with robes.
    Would you seriously think every.single.girl. has the same taste? If my girls were cool with robes, I still wouldn't get them the same BECAUSE THEY AREN'T THE SAME!

    I was lucky all the girls ended up liking the dress WE ALL FOUND and they wore the same.
    But if I were to buy them robes, I still would try to find a way to make them more personal to their likes, styles, etc.
  • Devil's advocate moment - let's pretend that the WP is cool with robes.
    Would you seriously think every.single.girl. has the same taste? If my girls were cool with robes, I still wouldn't get them the same BECAUSE THEY AREN'T THE SAME!

    I was lucky all the girls ended up liking the dress WE ALL FOUND and they wore the same.
    But if I were to buy them robes, I still would try to find a way to make them more personal to their likes, styles, etc.
    And even if they all liked the same robe, do they all have the same body type? Same thing with dresses, not everything looks good on or fits everyone.
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