Private Ceremony, very casual reception

Re: Private Ceremony, very casual reception

• CMGragain member

  

  January 2017 edited January 2017

  The formality of the occasion is usually indicated by the style of the invitation design.  You can still use traditional wording.  300 guests!  I am assuming that your sister and her FI are hosting the reception?
  
  

  The pleasure of your company is requested

  at the wedding reception of

  Bride's Full Name

  and

  Groom's Full Name

  Saturday, the twenty-third of June

  two thousand seventeen

  City Park

  123 Maple Street

  Anytown, Iowa

  
  R.s.v.p.

  
  If your sister wants something more modern, this might be acceptable:
  
  

  You are invited to the wedding reception of

  Bride's Full Name

  and

  Groom's Full Name

  (etc.)

  
  Avoid phrases like "celebration of marriage", or "You are invited to celebrate the marriage of...."  This is too vague, and will confuse people.  You must be crystal clear that they are invited to a WEDDING RECEPTION!
  It is rude to state a dress code on an invitation, unless it is black tie.  I think a lot of guests are going to be very confused.  I hope your sister has a wedding website.  This would be one place where she could put some information about her reception.  For heaven's sake, stay off of Facebook and other social media about this!
  Expect a lot of declines, especially for out of town guests.  Most people want to see the actual ceremony.
  A design something like this one would get the idea across.
  
  
  
  
  
  

  

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• MobKaz member

  

  January 2017

  asimms12 said:

  Trying to figure out wording for my sister's invitations. She is having a very small ceremony with the parents and siblings. The reception/celebration is right after and will have approx 300 guests. She is wearing jeans and he will probably wear shorts.
  
  Trying to get wording that shows it's (a)casual and (b)just a reception. Any help?

  I don't think there is any wording that would convey to me that it is appropriate and/or expected to wear jeans or shorts to a wedding reception.  Where is this reception being held?  At what time of day is this reception.  I would guess that most guests would be wearing khaki's and sundresses.  I'm not sure how I would feel if I attended and saw the groom wearing shorts.
  
  
  

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• knottiej member

  

  January 2017

  Did you mean 30?

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• LondonLisa member

  

  January 2017 edited January 2017

  The type of invitation usually sets the tone for the event. I would not expect to wear jeans or shorts to a wedding reception, ever, regardless of how casual it is. Whilst they can wear whatever they want,  if they expect people to celebrate them and buy them a gift, they should at minimum dress like they want to entertain their guests (even if he is just in a collared shirt and she is in a casual sundress that they both already own). 
  
  I would definitely use very informal language (CMG's 2nd option above) and on very casual paper that isn't super wedding-y. 
  
  The way you dress sends a message to the people you are around. I am all for being casual, but you are asking people to spend a day celebrating the couple, buy gifts, and (generally) weddings are understood to be dress-up occasions. They should at least put a little effort in as the hosts/B&G.
  
  I am not saying they need to be in formal wear, but there is a big difference between this:
  
  
  And This:
  
  
  As well as in jeans:
  
  Vs
  
  
  
  Keep in casual, but they should put in a little effort to make it smart. 

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• CMGragain member

  

  January 2017 edited January 2017

  I still vividly remember my late mother, dressed in her new suit, with her high heels sinking into the mud at my sister's wedding in the park shelter.  She had been TOLD not to dress up, but she just HAD to wear that dress!  The look on her face was priceless!  She didn't want to sit on the picnic table.   Grandma glared at Mom and snarled, "Oh, shut up and sit down, for heaven's sake!  This pig roast is delicious!"
  My sister gathered up her borrowed wedding dress and jumped on her new husband's Harley.  Off she went, wearing my good pearls!  Vroom, vroom!  I thought Mom was going to faint, and I had no intention of catching her when she fell.
  

  

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• MairePoppy mod

  

  January 2017

  MobKaz said:

  asimms12 said:

  Trying to figure out wording for my sister's invitations. She is having a very small ceremony with the parents and siblings. The reception/celebration is right after and will have approx 300 guests. She is wearing jeans and he will probably wear shorts.
  
  Trying to get wording that shows it's (a)casual and (b)just a reception. Any help?

  I don't think there is any wording that would convey to me that it is appropriate and/or expected to wear jeans or shorts to a wedding reception.  Where is this reception being held?  At what time of day is this reception.  I would guess that most guests would be wearing khaki's and sundresses.  I'm not sure how I would feel if I attended and saw the groom wearing shorts.
  
  
  

  My cousin and his wife had a celebration of marriage/1st anniversary party. It was a casual catered backyard bbq. There was a tent with tables and chairs for all, with mason jars and  burlap decor. The 'bride' was dressed in a white strapless ballerina style wedding dress, her 'maids' wore long dresses. The 'groom' and his men wore camo shorts and t-shirts with tux graphics, which they thought were clever. I felt my cousin was disrespectful, considering his wife and every guest had made the effort to look smart.
  
  I think the bride and groom should look like the day and their guests are important to them. I like LondonLisa's suggestions and wouldn't go more casual than that.

                     

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• mrose88 member

  

  January 2017

  As others have said, she should definitely state that it's a reception only. I also agree with keeping your stationary and wording straight-forward and casual. If there are other details you could include to help people understand the casual tone of the day (for example including "back yard BBQ" if that's applicable), that is good too. 
  
  I have to say, though: I know it's against etiquette to state dress code on an invitation, but I personally am always so happy when people break that rule. I haaaate showing up and feeling either over or under dressed. The only time I mind is when people get cute with it (I was once invited to an event and the dress code was described as "[City we Live in] Chic," and I couldn't figure out WTF that was supposed to mean). 
  
  I recently attended a reception-only celebration that was pretty casual. One bride wore a white sun dress while the other wore black pants and a sparkly tank top, and guests ranged from wearing cocktail dresses to jeans. When we were invited the brides told us verbally to "wear whatever makes you feel comfortable", and that seemed to work well. I'm not sure if that's a realistic message to pass on to 300 people verbally, though...

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• ahoywedding member

  

  January 2017

  Are you creating a wedding website? That might be a good place to let people know more about the level of formality. For example, on ours I list that the ceremony will be outside on a lawn, which hopefully will clue people in to wear comfortable shoes. I've seen some people do an "FAQ" section which can get too cutesy real fast, but if done right can provide good info for your guests.

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• kwiksilver member

  

  March 2017

  Oh you're going to get in trouble for commenting on an old thread...
  

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