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wedding dress sent to goodwill by accident

CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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in Chit Chat
This is sad.  I feel bad for her.  My dress has no sentimental value, and I am hoping to put it up for sale soon, but I can TOTALLY see how it holds sentimental value for many other people. 

http://abc7chicago.com/news/husband-accidentally-donates-wifes-wedding-dress-to-goodwill/1814697/

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Re: wedding dress sent to goodwill by accident

  • MissKittyDangerMissKittyDanger member
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    I kind of question how it was "accidentally donated" but maybe the way I have donation stuff set up is different ...
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  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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    There's a lot of comments questioning that.  They said "it was in the same looking bag for donations"...... I can see my DH picking up the wrong bag myself, if it was near it?  But I also hope I'd never put a wedding dress I intend to keep near my good will stuff.

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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    edited March 2017

    I know, I know.  It's the internet.  But what is wrong with people?  Why are they so needlessly mean to someone who is already sad?  So many comments alluding to her plus size.  Which has nothing to do with her problem.

    And she's still making payments on the dress?  (I'm assuming a David's Bridal credit card).  I hope she's at least not making payments for long.  Because if a person is taking 3 years to pay off their wedding gown, they made an error in judgment.

    Now I don't want to be one knocking her while she's down, but one of the things she is upset about is there are "no wedding gowns passed down through the family and hers was going to be the first".  Ummm...I would guess most families don't have wedding dresses passed down.  Do you know why?  Because clothing styles, including wedding dresses, change.  Because family members wear different sizes and have different tastes.  Her dress was lovely, but I'd bet dollars to doughnuts there is no one else who would ever wear it again.

    My grandma's wedding dress was lovely, but not really my style.  And she only weighed 85 lbs. on her wedding day, so that was a serious no-go.  My mom got married in 1970.  70s fashion?  Nuff said.

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  • ei34ei34 member
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    That sucks.  I agree with PP that I doubt it would've become a family heirloom- her future daughters/nieces/granddaughters may want to pick their own dress- but it's hard losing a material item you're very emotionally attached to.

    Ugh the comments are so gross.  I'm so so tired of nasty comments by losers behind their keyboards fat-shaming like it's nothing.  She looks lovely in her dress...they're all jerks.  
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  • CMGragainCMGragain member
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    edited March 2017
    "My mom got married in 1970.  70s fashion?  Nuff said."

    @short+sassy,  I was married in 1976, and I still love my dress!  We had SLEEVES back then, and lace, too.  My daughter got to choose her own dress because we could afford it.  I am sorry I didn't donate my dress back in the 70s.  It would have been nice if another bride could have enjoyed it.  It was actually modeled at a vintage bridal fashion show a few years back.  Still beautiful!  I had a pooffy veil like this one, too!

    "Elaine!  Elaine!"......."Ben!"

    Image result for image The Graduate wedding scene
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  • MobKazMobKaz member
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    short+sassy said:

    I know, I know.  It's the internet.  But what is wrong with people?  Why are they so needlessly mean to someone who is already sad?  So many comments alluding to her plus size.  Which has nothing to do with her problem.

    And she's still making payments on the dress?  (I'm assuming a David's Bridal credit card).  I hope she's at least not making payments for long.  Because if a person is taking 3 years to pay off their wedding gown, they made an error in judgment.

    Now I don't want to be one knocking her while she's down, but one of the things she is upset about is there are "no wedding gowns passed down through the family and hers was going to be the first".  Ummm...I would guess most families don't have wedding dresses passed down.  Do you know why?  Because clothing styles, including wedding dresses, change.  Because family members wear different sizes and have different tastes.  Her dress was lovely, but I'd bet dollars to doughnuts there is no one else who would ever wear it again.

    My grandma's wedding dress was lovely, but not really my style.  And she only weighed 85 lbs. on her wedding day, so that was a serious no-go.  My mom got married in 1970.  70s fashion?  Nuff said.

    I almost never read the comments on posts any more.  There are some incredibly vile and scary people in our world. 

    My eyes jumped to that same excerpt.  She is already married, and presumably made the purchase many months ago.  Why are you still paying for your dress?  I hope the entire wedding wasn't paid for on credit.  That is not the way to plan a wedding!


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  • MissKittyDangerMissKittyDanger member
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    @CharmedPam  Fair enough. I guess that's why a lot of wedding dress places are putting dresses in a bag that doesn't look like a bag lol!

    @CMGragain  *starts humming Mrs Robinson*
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  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing member
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    When I was younger, I wanted to wear my mom's dress, which was my grandma's dress, who got married in the 60's. Then I got older and changed my mind. It still looks very nice and classy, certainly not overly dated, but just wasn't my style. It was all over lace, which isn't my thing. It was also borderline too short for my mom when she wore it, and I'm taller than her.

    I could definitely see someone wearing it today and not looking out of place. 
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  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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    edited March 2017
    MobKaz said:
    short+sassy said:

    I know, I know.  It's the internet.  But what is wrong with people?  Why are they so needlessly mean to someone who is already sad?  So many comments alluding to her plus size.  Which has nothing to do with her problem.

    And she's still making payments on the dress?  (I'm assuming a David's Bridal credit card).  I hope she's at least not making payments for long.  Because if a person is taking 3 years to pay off their wedding gown, they made an error in judgment.

    Now I don't want to be one knocking her while she's down, but one of the things she is upset about is there are "no wedding gowns passed down through the family and hers was going to be the first".  Ummm...I would guess most families don't have wedding dresses passed down.  Do you know why?  Because clothing styles, including wedding dresses, change.  Because family members wear different sizes and have different tastes.  Her dress was lovely, but I'd bet dollars to doughnuts there is no one else who would ever wear it again.

    My grandma's wedding dress was lovely, but not really my style.  And she only weighed 85 lbs. on her wedding day, so that was a serious no-go.  My mom got married in 1970.  70s fashion?  Nuff said.

    I almost never read the comments on posts any more.  There are some incredibly vile and scary people in our world. 

    My eyes jumped to that same excerpt.  She is already married, and presumably made the purchase many months ago.  Why are you still paying for your dress?  I hope the entire wedding wasn't paid for on credit.  That is not the way to plan a wedding!


    I can't really side eye that, because while my dress was paid outright, we did put some of our wedding on a 0% finance card that we had until June or July of this year before an interest rate hit.  We paid it off in February, but it was still 4 moths after the wedding. 

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  • emmaaaemmaaa mod
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    I feel so bad for her. I saw this on my FB since I'm in NC. I love my dress and to me, it holds sentimental value. I know I'll never wear it again and I doubt my daughter will want to wear it, but I still want to keep it. 

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  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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    Ro041 said:
    CharmedPam said:
    I almost never read the comments on posts any more.  There are some incredibly vile and scary people in our world. 

    My eyes jumped to that same excerpt.  She is already married, and presumably made the purchase many months ago.  Why are you still paying for your dress?  I hope the entire wedding wasn't paid for on credit.  That is not the way to plan a wedding!


    I can't really side eye that, because while my dress was paid outright, we did put some of our wedding on a 0% finance card that we had until June or July of this year.  We paid it off in February, but it was still 4 moths after the wedding. 
    So, I read this and thought about what you said @CharmedPam regarding paying something off after the wedding.  I creeped on this woman's FB page and she got married on October 3, 2015, which means she most likely picked out the dress in Spring 2015.  That is a really long time to be paying off a dress and it certainly isn't the same as what you did, which was take out a 0% interest credit card and pay it off (eta - which can be financially smart because it leaves more of your money liquid and able to be invested)!

    Also, the comments are so gross.  

    True.  I didn't know the dates.  Comments are always gross with people.  It was a facebook post where I got it from as well, and some of the comments were "why were you paying on a David's Bridal dress?" and stuff like that.  Some David's Bridal gowns cost $2,000ish....it could be easy to do! 

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  • CMGragainCMGragain member
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    edited March 2017
    I learned a long time ago to not attach too much emotional importance to THINGS.  Things can be stolen.  Things can be lost.  Things can be taken away.

    I am sorry the bride experienced this, but I think she is putting too  much importance on her wedding dress.  PEOPLE are more important than things.

    When I am gone, I don't care what DH does with my things.  I hope they can give pleasure to someone else.  I do draw the line at letting his next wife wear my good jewelry, though! :D  My jewelry will go to my daughter, as per my legal will!

    PS.  I do NOT understand why anyone would plan a wedding with anything that needs to have "payments" made on it.  If you can't pay cash, then make do with something you can afford.  We haven't always had money, but even in our super thrifty days, we never bought anything that we couldn't pay for at the end of the month!  My own wedding dress was a used sample dress. ($99)  I made some repairs on it myself.  It wasn't THE dress, it was a dress.   I actually wound up liking it very much, though it wasn't what I had pictured in my mind.  Cake and punch reception for us because that was what we could afford!
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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    I hope, at least with so much publicity, that the person who bought the dress comes forward.

    Though, if I was the bride who bought her dress, I'd be like, "Look, I bought your dress.  But here's the deal.  You can give me enough money to buy another wedding dress I like or I will wear this one to my wedding (and I made need to alter it), but I will be happy to give it back to you after that."

    After all, if the person found a gown they liked for only $25, why should they potentially be out of a LOT of money to buy another beautiful dress?  They made their purchase fair and square and it isn't their fault this couple made a mistake.  But I think offering the couple back the gown for purchase (and NOT $25) or offering to give it back to them after the wedding are both fair compromises.

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  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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    VERY good suggestions, @short+sassy.  If I was the person who bought the dress from goodwill, I'd love to be able to give it back after my wedding and essentially just "rent" it for $25.  it's win win.

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  • emmaaaemmaaa mod
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    I saw an article the other day that her dress was found and returned to her

    http://wncn.com/2017/03/24/durham-woman-gets-back-dress-accidentally-donated-to-goodwill/

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  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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    Good!

    But Friday she got some good news. The Goodwill store called back. The earlier information was incorrect, and the dress hadn’t been sold at all.

    I kinda wondered how it sold so quickly, since I'm sure she called them the minute she found out it was donated.  But it's a nice dress, and i'm sure it could have sold the minute it went on the floor.

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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    CharmedPam said:
    Good!

    But Friday she got some good news. The Goodwill store called back. The earlier information was incorrect, and the dress hadn’t been sold at all.

    I kinda wondered how it sold so quickly, since I'm sure she called them the minute she found out it was donated.  But it's a nice dress, and i'm sure it could have sold the minute it went on the floor.
    Every once in awhile, I'll pop into a thrift store to see if I can find any Ebay goodies.  I was at a Goodwill once and an employee was putting these Disney figurines from Disney World's 35th anniversary on the shelf.  I asked her how much they were and she told me, "$4."  I told her, "Don't even put them on the shelf, just hand them all to me!"  There were four of them.  I sold them all on Ebay for an average of $45 per/figurine.  If only all my Goodwill trips ended that way!
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  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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    short+sassy said:
    CharmedPam said:
    Good!

    But Friday she got some good news. The Goodwill store called back. The earlier information was incorrect, and the dress hadn’t been sold at all.

    I kinda wondered how it sold so quickly, since I'm sure she called them the minute she found out it was donated.  But it's a nice dress, and i'm sure it could have sold the minute it went on the floor.
    Every once in awhile, I'll pop into a thrift store to see if I can find any Ebay goodies.  I was at a Goodwill once and an employee was putting these Disney figurines from Disney World's 35th anniversary on the shelf.  I asked her how much they were and she told me, "$4."  I told her, "Don't even put them on the shelf, just hand them all to me!"  There were four of them.  I sold them all on Ebay for an average of $45 per/figurine.  If only all my Goodwill trips ended that way!
    My friend can find excellent coach purses, kitchenaid's, dyson vacuums at next to nothing.  She's like the best bargain hunter.  And I'm pretty sure those were all "just placed on the floor" items. 

    She also calls it the "stink store". LOL

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