Addressing Questions

Re: Addressing Questions

• southernbelle0915 mod

  

  May 2017

  
  

  MandTFebruary62011 said:

  
  

  Hi, I'm hoping you guys can tell me the right thing to do.  
  On my list I have people as Jenny and James Smith.  But I think this is not how the invitation should be addressed, that it needs to be more formal.  I know I a lot of people dislike "Mr. & Mrs. James Smith" but I feel like "Mr. James and Mrs. Jenny Smith" is a little long.
  
  Can anyone help me with the proper way to address?
  
  Also, I have some famlies.  Is it appropriate to just say "The Smith Family" or do I need to address everyone individually?  I don't want confusion over who is invited either, but I'm not sure there would be.  
  
  Thanks!

  
  

  
  If you're inviting the entire Smith family, addressing it as "The Smith Family" is fine. 
  
  The most formal way to address couples is "Mr. and Mrs. John Doe". But you're right. Many women who take their husbands' last names are offended by this method. A more modern, but still acceptable alternative, would be "Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Doe".
  
  If you have women who kept their last name: "Mrs. Jane Smith and Mr. John Doe". If you have same sex couples: "Mr. John Doe and Mr. Jim Jones". 

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• MyNameIsNot member

  

  May 2017

  Mr. and Mrs. Jane and John Smith is ok if you want to include the wife's first name. If that still feels to long, you can go with the informal Jane and John Smith and drop the titles. (But only if you're not going formal). 
  
  You should include all the names of the Smith family who are invited. You'd put the kids on a line below the parents. (You don't have to include titles for kids). 
  
  Mr. and Mrs. Jane and John Smith
  Timmy, Sue, Jack
  
  
  

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• CMGragain member

  

  May 2017 edited May 2017

  
  
  
  
  
  
  

  MyNameIsNot said:

  
  
  
  
  
  
  

  Mr. and Mrs. Jane and John Smith is ok if you want to include the wife's first name. If that still feels to long, you can go with the informal Jane and John Smith and drop the titles. (But only if you're not going formal). 
  
  You should include all the names of the Smith family who are invited. You'd put the kids on a line below the parents. (You don't have to include titles for kids). 
  
  Mr. and Mrs. Jane and John Smith
  Timmy, Sue, Jack
  
  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  
  I disagree with the form "Mr. and Mrs. Jane and John Smith".  It is awkward and not a correct form of address.  You never separate the person's name from their title.
  I would recommend "Ms. Jane Smith and Mr. John Smith" on one line of text, followed by the children's names on the next line.
  
  "Mrs. Jane Smith" implies that she is a divorcee, which is why I do approve of the newer title "Ms.".  A lady may choose her style of address, but properly, she is one of the following:
  
  Miss Jane Smith (if she is unmarried),
  Mrs. John Smith (if she is married or widowed, and she wants to use her traditional social name),
  Ms. Jane Smith (covers everyone female)
  
  OP, you have your choice of the following.  Both are correct.
  
  Mr. and Mrs. John Smith (traditional)
  Ms. Jane Smith and Mr. John Smith 
  
  If you are using first names for both people, then you must also use last names for both people.  Generally, the lady's name goes first.  As a traditionalist, I think titles should always be used on any mail addresses.  For heaven's sake, we are only talking about a total of 4 letters for Mr/Ms!
  
  
  
  
  

  

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• ernursej member

  

  May 2017

  Find out from the people you are inviting how they would like to be addressed. You may get ladies that are fine with Mrs. John Smith and others that would not like that. You could even get people that hate Mr. and Mrs. and might prefer Jane and John Smith. 

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