Earn cash as you plan. Get a $20 gift card for every 200 points with The Knot Rewards
Wedding Woes
OliveOilsMom
member
MYOB or Move
OliveOilsMom
member
in Wedding Woes
Dear Prudence,
I rent a room in a house belonging to a wealthy attorney. When I moved in, he told me he’d be home maybe two days a week; his fiancée lives a bit closer to the city where he works. I met his fiancée a few weeks ago. There are pictures of the two of them, with children I believe to be from a previous relationship of hers, in the living room.
Recently I forgot my phone charger at work and went to ask my landlord if I could borrow his. When I went upstairs, I saw he was with a woman other than his fiancée. My suspicions were confirmed when I was forced to listen to them having sex for the next 30 minutes. (His bedroom is just above mine.) I tried to ignore it, but recently he had another woman over and the same thing happened.
He continues to mention his fiancée, and while I don’t want to judge (and I’m aware of the concept of open relationships), something tells me she doesn’t know. This, coupled with the fact that there are children involved, has me uneasy. I have a month-to-month lease. I like my living situation, and for what I’m paying, I’d be hard-pressed to find something safe in the same area. Do I mind my own business and hope his rendezvous don’t keep me awake in the future, or say something to my landlord and risk getting the boot?
—Tentative Tenant
Re: MYOB or Move
Sounds like an otherwise decent arrangement, but if OP is really that uncomfortable, leave.
It's not her circus but there's absolutely ZERO good that will come of her telling on her landlord while living there. He clearly does not care what the tenant thinks or else the other woman wouldn't have been in plain sight while he was there nor would he have engaged in sex potentially loud enough for her to hear.
But it's his house and it's his right to bed other women. For all she knows it's an open relationship. In this situation I'd very very hesitant to say anything although I'd feel really awkward about staying there.
I'm not a big fan of making statements about a relationship unless I think that someone could be setting him/herself up for possible diseases. Even then, I would have to really know the situation to feel compelled to say something.
If it makes LW uncomfortable {it would myself tbh} then they should move.
(just kidding, don't throw fruit!)
If the OP is aware that the fiancee thinks that this is an exclusive relationship and has no idea that her FI is a cheating prick, I'd move out and find a way for her to know. Once the health of someone is involved I'd speak up but I'd want to be certain before I opened my mouth.
(I say this as someone who had her ex cheat on her, had people know and was really pissed that people were aware. It took me months to know that I had a clean bill of health while alleged friends vowed not to say anything.)
This whole thing is so bizarre. She has a professional relationship with her landlord and no relationship with his fiancée. She has NO BUSINESS meddling into his personal affairs that do not directly affect her. The only thing that affects her is, perhaps, the "noise".
Wait, was she granted a Queen of Morals job that I am not aware of? No? Then why is she even worrying about this. I mean, I guess if it really bothers QoM she should move, but that just sounds so stupid considering she likes her living situation, except for his possible cheating. Just side-eye him in private and enjoy the cheaper digs in a nice neighborhood.
If it was a friend or something I was close to, I would definitely tell them. I'm just thinking as LW isn't a friend and is only a tenant
So wealthy that he feels the need to rent out a room in his personal home to a nosy tenant.
I feel like this is the plot line of a poorly-written trashy novel.
Agree with PPs - the LW should mind her own business or get out.