Earn cash as you plan. Get a $20 gift card for every 200 points with The Knot Rewards
Wedding Woes
mrsconn23
member
Leave them alone. You're a nightmare.
in Wedding Woes
Q. Son won’t have children: We are concerned our only son isn’t having children. Every time we bring it up with him, he seems to have a new excuse. Recently when we tried to discuss this with our daughter-in-law directly, she said her high-powered career would be severely impacted if she didn’t plan child-bearing carefully because she doesn’t get paid parental leave at her workplace. We tried to encourage her by saying that she doesn’t even need to work since our son is very successful and we have considerable means. This seems to have offended her greatly. How do we convince them that we only want them to be happy?
Re: Leave them alone. You're a nightmare.
2 - maybe DIL doesn't want to rely on your son?
3 - maybe this is a nice way of saying it's not a thing for them
4 - you're a fucking nightmare of a MIL/Mother
Goodness, that ungrateful b**ch!! How dare she put her career...that I'm sure she has spent years of education and experience cultivating...above your need to have grandchildren.
Because, who doesn't want to be partially supported by their overbearing and sexist ILs, amiright?
If you just want them to be happy, you're not putting in a vote on the kid/no kid thing. (Heaven knows that the kid/no kid thing wasn't a sure thing or an easy choice in my life)
So yeah, LW, if your DIL is anything like me, she'll stop speaking to your sorry, overinvolved, opinionated ass. Shut up...your children don't owe you grandchildren and they're adults making adult decisions. Stay out of it.
The LW has done herself zero favors here. Speak of the joys of having kids ONE TIME EVER in conversation and let it go. DO NOT INSERT YOURSELF IN THEIR FINANCES.
The LW needs to apologize to her son and DIL now.
She owes them a huge apology.
Ok, 1) Because I have a great job too, I like my job, and I like simply HAVING a job. It makes me feel secure, independent, and productive. 2) It's hard to believe in 2017, but women can be mothers and work. 3) WHY DON'T PEOPLE ASK MEN THIS QUESTION?
These people sound awful. Nosy parents are one thing. Nosy, controlling, judgy, sexist, obtuse parents are unbearable. These are the same type of people who will be pissed if the son does have a kid and doesn't name it after them. SMH.
It's almost worse when you - FOR WHATEVER REASON MY BRAIN HAS - write 2016
I input dates A LOT in my job. In fact, I had to start retraining my brain in Dec. for eta delivery dates in 2018.
It has been very challenging, lol.
I apologized because it was something I was doing for a client .... they understood for the most part {minus 2016 lmfao}
It was a mess :')
Saw this on Reddit- quick way to learn the new year, lol
the son needs to step in and give his mom a "ho sit down" card. "i'm not sure why you're so interested in your son's sex life, but you need to cut it out. every time you mention grand kids, we're adding a year before we start trying."
I have a good friend that probably could have written this. hopefully her MIL isn't like LW, but she and her H both have high profile jobs (her more so). she's not 100% sold on kids to begin with, but work life balance would be a big thing for her, and she sure as all hell didn't get an MD and work hard for years to get a high profile industry job to drop it to be a SAHM. She was awkward with Wolverine, and our kid is fairly easy going. It was actually really funny from my standpoint - we were eating dinner at a restaurant, not having her babysit or anything. She wouldn't be happy at all. (Not to mention I really couldn't see her H as a father - i feel like he'd be all, "men don't do that" so the kid would be largely raised by my friend and a nanny)
Thank gods my MIL and mother don't hound me like this. If they did I really can't say how I'd handle it, but I know we wouldn't be spending as much time with them.
I'll also add that I get really sick of women having to justify why they want to work. Like "oh well her job pays really well" or "she worked hard for her title" or "she went to school for a long time". I don't care if someone is a CEO or they're a cashier at McDonald's. Neither woman should have to justify why or if she wants to go back to work. Men are NEVER asked these questions "why do you feel you need to go back to work?" or "why don't you just stay home?" or "doesn't your wife support you?"
It reminds me of last name discussions where people are like "she's keeping it because she's made a name for herself in her field" or "oh well she's published under her maiden name, so it makes sense" or "there's a lot of family history there." No. Men never have to make these excuses or justify their choice to keep their name. They just do it and no questions it or feels the need to justify why they did it.
There are lots of couples out there who don't want children, full stop. They don't have fertility issues, or anything else going on. They just don't feel the need to have and raise children and that's their choice. It's no one's business.
If LW was my mother, we would not be on speaking terms. Who the hell does she think she is?