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Registering and Gifts

Do I send a gift, two gifts, gift plus card? So many choices..

A friend of mine is getting married out of the U.S. and my husband and I are unable to attend because of the cost and time. She is having a small reception at her parent's home in the U.S. two months later, which we do plan to attend.

My question is - should I send her a gift from her registry at the time of the actual wedding? Do I send a gift before the later reception (so we don't have to fly with it)? Do I send a gift at the time of the wedding plus bring a card or another gift to the reception? So many options. I definitely want to get them something but just not sure what the right way to go about it is in this situation. This community always seems to set me straight on what is appropriate :) 


Re: Do I send a gift, two gifts, gift plus card? So many choices..

  • I would get one gift and send it to their home close the the legal wedding date. Send it either early enough it gets there before they leave or after you know they've returned. If you feel uncomfortable or weird showing up to the later reception empty-handed, I don't think it would be stupid or out of line to bring a card to that. Most of the gifts that are ordered online don't come with a card so you wouldn't be duplicating anything. You don't need to put anything in the card, just a nice message of congratulations and letting them know you're happy to celebrate with them, etc.
  • I’m sure you know this but you are not obligated to send a gift at all. The party they’re throwing is not a “reception”...receptions happen immediately following the wedding itself. They’re throwing a party - that’s it. 

    That said, a gift is more appropriate at the time of the actual wedding. Try to have it mailed before the leave or when you know they’re back so it doesn’t sit on their porch. 

  • scribe95 said:
    Send a gift at the time of the wedding and bring more of hostess-type gift for AHR - a nice bottle of wine etc.
    Exactly what I was just about to write. 
  • Thanks for your input everyone!  <3
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