Wedding Woes

Can I help this friend?

I'm not sure if there's anything we can do, but throwing it out there just in case.

I have a friend who's been unemployed for about a year and a half. She's exhausted any unemployment benefits obviously, and gets a small amount of food stamps. She hasn't been trying super hard to find work, and refuses to look at retail, restaurant, etc. The city she lives in is pretty service-industry oriented (smallish beach town). Her uncle had given her some money to take an EMT course, but she is still finishing that and said there aren't many jobs where she lives. Otherwise her family isn't real supportive. Well she texted me today that now she's homeless. She had been living in a condo and renting from the owners, but they plan to retire soon and want their beach home back so they gave her a two month notice to find a new place. 

I feel so bad for her, but I'm not sure what we can do to help. She wants to get into healthcare and I work in that field so I suggested getting her CNA certification, as there's a good size hospital in town that's always hiring. She said she feels no need to get that, and that's not what she wants to do. In my head I'm like but.... It's a JOB. We live about 2.5 hours away. I work from home, so her staying with us isn't really any option. Any thoughts?
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Re: Can I help this friend?

  • ahoybaby said:
    I'm not sure if there's anything we can do, but throwing it out there just in case.

    I have a friend who's been unemployed for about a year and a half. She's exhausted any unemployment benefits obviously, and gets a small amount of food stamps. She hasn't been trying super hard to find work, and refuses to look at retail, restaurant, etc. The city she lives in is pretty service-industry oriented (smallish beach town). Her uncle had given her some money to take an EMT course, but she is still finishing that and said there aren't many jobs where she lives. Otherwise her family isn't real supportive. Well she texted me today that now she's homeless. She had been living in a condo and renting from the owners, but they plan to retire soon and want their beach home back so they gave her a two month notice to find a new place. 

    I feel so bad for her, but I'm not sure what we can do to help. She wants to get into healthcare and I work in that field so I suggested getting her CNA certification, as there's a good size hospital in town that's always hiring. She said she feels no need to get that, and that's not what she wants to do. In my head I'm like but.... It's a JOB. We live about 2.5 hours away. I work from home, so her staying with us isn't really any option. Any thoughts?
    Have you asked her what she wants to do? Your CNA suggestion seems like a good one. Can you ask and then maybe give more feedback on that? It sounds like there may not be much you can do since it seems like she maybe isn't willing to put in the work to get where she wants to go. 
  • I feel for your friend.  It's so hard to be in such a tough place.  But, at the same time, the harsh truth is that she needs to get off her high horse and get her head out of the sand.

    There are limited employment opps in the beach town she has chosen to stay in.  She needs to take what she can get and stop waiting for some unicorn opportunity.  Waiting tables is not glamorous.  I've done it.  But it can pay decent money.  The writing has been on the wall for awhile.  Personally, I can't begin to understand why she didn't take something, ANYTHING.  It's not forever.  It's to get by, until she is done with her schooling and then finds a job in that field.

    About 6 years ago, I lost my job at the height of the UE crisis.  I usually didn't have trouble finding a new opportunity, but I sure did then.  There were few jobs to even send my resume to.  And I live in a medium sized city.  It was over a year until I found another f/t job.

    In the meantime...

    Did I want to take a temp gig passing out olive samples at Sam's Club for half the money (per hour) I previously made?  No.  No I did not, lol.  Did I want to take a very p/t job making a third less (per hour) than what I previously did and was over a 30 minute drive away.  No.  No I did not again.

    But I hustled to make whatever bits of extra money I could find.  Because that is what I needed to do to survive until life got financially better.

    The problem is, you can be her cheerleader and give her all of the pep talk of "just find something for now, it's not forever", but she needs to make that decision and see that for herself.  She might be suffering from depression, which can be its own vicious circle.  As in, she doesn't bother trying to do something different because she feels hopeless.

    It's hard to see someone you care about in desperate straits.  But don't take that guilt onto yourself or feel responsible for "saving her". 

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Nope you can’t help. She’s gotta figure it out. 
  • Ditto what Barbie said. 

    What kind of job Job did she have before losing it? My guess is she is the kind of person who things always work out for even when they shouldn’t and she just assumes someone else will swoop in and save her bc that is what always happens. Don’t be that person. 
  • This is totally heartless but stand your ground about her not coming to stay with you.  You never know when “can I just stay for a night or two?” turns into weeks or months  :#

    Servers at the right restaurants make $500 in tips on a Friday or Saturday night.  Trader Joe’s pays $18/hr.  Etc.  Just things I’d remind her of if she feels above retail and food service.  

    CNA, a home health aide, a phlebotomist, a medical biller...all good health care jobs that don’t require too much training.  Is she open to moving somewhere where there are better EMT employment opportunities?
  • If she is truly homeless you could find/compile a list of homeless shelters for women and pass them on to her. Whoever is her contact at social services where she is getting her food stamps can also provide her with names and resources for Section 8 for housing. There will be requirements she has to comply with in order to get additional benefits, which may include work-related requirements. If she is struggle with mental health she might qualify for Medicaid and could get care. 

    This is obviously without knowing her, but it sounds like she doesn't truly understand the impact of what true homelessness is and is waiting for someone to save her, give her money/a place to live/pay her way. Unless you're actually willing to do that (it doesn't sound like you are) this may just be a time when she has figure it out on her own. 
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited February 2018
    ahoybaby said:
    I'm not sure if there's anything we can do, but throwing it out there just in case.

    I have a friend who's been unemployed for about a year and a half. She's exhausted any unemployment benefits obviously, and gets a small amount of food stamps. She hasn't been trying super hard to find work, and refuses to look at retail, restaurant, etc. The city she lives in is pretty service-industry oriented (smallish beach town). Her uncle had given her some money to take an EMT course, but she is still finishing that and said there aren't many jobs where she lives.
    In my 67 years, I have been homeless,  I have worked as a ladies locker room attendant, I scrubbed toilets,  changed diapers, stood behind a counter at a retail store (learned a lot), scrubbed floors...you get the idea.  Your friend needs to get off her butt and help herself.  A little tough life might open her eyes.   Don't enable her.  JMHO.

    PS.  My daughter still has nightmares about being a server at a Bob Evan's Restaurant.  It really helped her get through college, and she graduated with top honors!
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • ahoyweddingahoywedding member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited February 2018
    Ugh, thanks guys. I talked it out with my H last night too and he said basically the same things. He's a recovering addict and has dealt with his share of favor-asking friends who were up a creek (and been up the same creek himself) and keeps telling me she has to figure it out on her own. I *know* that I shouldn't try to help her and she has to handle this on her own, it's just hard to see someone you care about struggling.

    To answer some questions, she has a Master's in some kind of health science (she was very vague about it and hasn't used it, but it's something like exercise science). She previously worked for some sketchy for-profit colleges and volunteers as a coach for the Special Olympics, so she's only looking at jobs in higher education or working with people with disabilities. That was kind of what prompted me to suggest getting her CNA certification; she was looking at home caregiver type jobs, and I mentioned she may look more reputable with some kind of certification. She thinks she shouldn't take a minimum wage job because she has her Master's. She does want to move, but that takes money. I've told her she could stay with us in the past IF she has an interview in our area and H said he'd make sure she was gone after a day or two lol. I don't know that EMT is her dream job, but just something that kind of fell into her lap since her uncle paid for the course.

    And I agree with all you about the hustling! I've worked some real shit jobs in the past, and would go back to them in a heartbeat if I suddenly lost my job and couldn't find a new one in my field. I've had 2-3 jobs while in college and pulled every kind of crap shift there is. 

    (Also apologies about the user name confusion, it's me, ahoywedding. I had joined The Bump and thought I could have two names but...womp womp. And now I can't change it back.)
  • nope you can't help.  Depression did enter my mind though.  Something else to suggest is substitute teaching.  At least in Ohio the degree would get her sub jobs.  We always need subs and it pays pretty well.
  • The thing is - she's struggling a lot due to her own choices.  

    SHE CHOSE to get a degree that isn't very employable in her field.   SHE is CHOOSING not to apply for jobs that will pay.  She is electing to avoid applying for jobs that will pay her.

    Part of me wonders if she's depressed but she also sounds like she hasn't taken a lot of initiative on her own to improve herself.

    At this point, the only thing I'd do is talk to her realistically.   18 months is too long to be handled with kid gloves.  

    This may be a long relationship for you but depending on what she chooses I would probably find myself letting a friendship like this fade.   It would be hard for me to be friends with someone who wants others to go out of their way to improve her life while not having her own skin in the game.  
  • This kinda makes me think of a friend of M's {mine by association as well}

    Except it's a tad different, he's gone back to school for 2 diff courses {restaurant related and security} but hasn't finished either - both are very close - and he hasn't worked in approx 6yrs. Only bonus is that he lives at home.

    For our friend, we've reached out to try and help out but - like your friend - you can only try and help. You can open doors, make suggestions and do what you have been doing but you cannot force her to do anything.

    Would moving home - or with family - help her out for a bit? At least she's not alone or homeless.
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited February 2018
    I think it's great that she's trying to earn her EMT cert. My cousin is an EMT and loves it.  I would suggest her picking up a waitress job as she finishes up school, maybe find someone who needs a roomie?  It's not permanent.  That's the thing.  It's not forever.  Maybe she's having a hard time realizing that?

  • I was wondering about the username. 

    There are a ton of people in her position who have decided that a minimum wage job beats being homeless. There’s a (sadly) large number of graduates who can’t find jobs in their fields. But instead of waiting for someone else to save them, they do what they have to do. That’s called being an adult. 

    I’m with @banana468. I would probably think about letting the friendship fade. You’re not abandoning a friend who is desperately trying to keep their head above water. She can swim, she’s just choosing not to. 


    image
  •  She thinks she shouldn't take a minimum wage job because she has her Master's   Bachelor's.
    This is my aunt. And it's exhausting. In general I try not to be judgmental, and I don't know what it's like to live in her life, but at the same time it's hard to feel sympathy time after time of her refusing to take a lower paying/ANY job because she has a degree. I have many degrees and I work two full-time jobs to make it work. You do what you have to. I get that pride can be a tricky thing, and it can make us act in ways that seem irrational, but at the same time work is work and it pays money. 
  •  She thinks she shouldn't take a minimum wage job because she has her Master's   Bachelor's.
    This is my aunt. And it's exhausting. In general I try not to be judgmental, and I don't know what it's like to live in her life, but at the same time it's hard to feel sympathy time after time of her refusing to take a lower paying/ANY job because she has a degree. I have many degrees and I work two full-time jobs to make it work. You do what you have to. I get that pride can be a tricky thing, and it can make us act in ways that seem irrational, but at the same time work is work and it pays money. 
    And the pride issue is what makes me frustrated.

    She's too prideful to work a minimum wage job but not too prideful to ask others who DO work to give her money or a place to live? That's bullshit.      

    Has she ever asked you if there are things she could do for you for money or has she only asked for you to spend your money on her? 


  • banana468 said:
     She thinks she shouldn't take a minimum wage job because she has her Master's   Bachelor's.
    This is my aunt. And it's exhausting. In general I try not to be judgmental, and I don't know what it's like to live in her life, but at the same time it's hard to feel sympathy time after time of her refusing to take a lower paying/ANY job because she has a degree. I have many degrees and I work two full-time jobs to make it work. You do what you have to. I get that pride can be a tricky thing, and it can make us act in ways that seem irrational, but at the same time work is work and it pays money. 
    And the pride issue is what makes me frustrated.

    She's too prideful to work a minimum wage job but not too prideful to ask others who DO work to give her money or a place to live? That's bullshit.      

    Has she ever asked you if there are things she could do for you for money or has she only asked for you to spend your money on her? 


    She's never *directly* asked for money, but she's said things like "just so you know, I'm homeless now and here's my PO box if you want to send anything," which H and I kind of took as an ask. She's also stayed with us VERY frequently in the past, using our house as kind of a free hotel when she has to be in this part of the state. I *mostly* didn't mind that (because, hey I got to see my friend!), but thinking about it now annoys me. I did offer to submit her resume for our customer service jobs when we were bonkers hiring around the end of the year (insurance company) this year and last and she said that wasn't something she'd consider. I think that was what really put me off. I know that job would suck, but it's a good company that offers benefits and decent pay, plus the opportunity to work from home after a while. I mean, suck it the hell up. I think you're right that I may need to kind of let things fade away. I don't get anything from the relationship anymore, and I feel like she only reaches out to me to tell me how shitty her life is.
  • banana468 said:
     She thinks she shouldn't take a minimum wage job because she has her Master's   Bachelor's.
    This is my aunt. And it's exhausting. In general I try not to be judgmental, and I don't know what it's like to live in her life, but at the same time it's hard to feel sympathy time after time of her refusing to take a lower paying/ANY job because she has a degree. I have many degrees and I work two full-time jobs to make it work. You do what you have to. I get that pride can be a tricky thing, and it can make us act in ways that seem irrational, but at the same time work is work and it pays money. 
    And the pride issue is what makes me frustrated.

    She's too prideful to work a minimum wage job but not too prideful to ask others who DO work to give her money or a place to live? That's bullshit.      

    Has she ever asked you if there are things she could do for you for money or has she only asked for you to spend your money on her? 


    She's never *directly* asked for money, but she's said things like "just so you know, I'm homeless now and here's my PO box if you want to send anything," which H and I kind of took as an ask. She's also stayed with us VERY frequently in the past, using our house as kind of a free hotel when she has to be in this part of the state. I *mostly* didn't mind that (because, hey I got to see my friend!), but thinking about it now annoys me. I did offer to submit her resume for our customer service jobs when we were bonkers hiring around the end of the year (insurance company) this year and last and she said that wasn't something she'd consider. I think that was what really put me off. I know that job would suck, but it's a good company that offers benefits and decent pay, plus the opportunity to work from home after a while. I mean, suck it the hell up. I think you're right that I may need to kind of let things fade away. I don't get anything from the relationship anymore, and I feel like she only reaches out to me to tell me how shitty her life is.

    Can you take the opportunity to give her tough love?  That you don't want to see her in an awful place but if she wants money she needs to earn it even if it's at a place that she doesn't like.  

    Essentially tell her the things you've written here.      

    Thus far I'm not seeing what her redeeming qualities are. 
  • banana468 said:
     She thinks she shouldn't take a minimum wage job because she has her Master's   Bachelor's.
    This is my aunt. And it's exhausting. In general I try not to be judgmental, and I don't know what it's like to live in her life, but at the same time it's hard to feel sympathy time after time of her refusing to take a lower paying/ANY job because she has a degree. I have many degrees and I work two full-time jobs to make it work. You do what you have to. I get that pride can be a tricky thing, and it can make us act in ways that seem irrational, but at the same time work is work and it pays money. 
    And the pride issue is what makes me frustrated.

    She's too prideful to work a minimum wage job but not too prideful to ask others who DO work to give her money or a place to live? That's bullshit.      

    Has she ever asked you if there are things she could do for you for money or has she only asked for you to spend your money on her? 


    She's never *directly* asked for money, but she's said things like "just so you know, I'm homeless now and here's my PO box if you want to send anything," which H and I kind of took as an ask. She's also stayed with us VERY frequently in the past, using our house as kind of a free hotel when she has to be in this part of the state. I *mostly* didn't mind that (because, hey I got to see my friend!), but thinking about it now annoys me. I did offer to submit her resume for our customer service jobs when we were bonkers hiring around the end of the year (insurance company) this year and last and she said that wasn't something she'd consider. I think that was what really put me off. I know that job would suck, but it's a good company that offers benefits and decent pay, plus the opportunity to work from home after a while. I mean, suck it the hell up. I think you're right that I may need to kind of let things fade away. I don't get anything from the relationship anymore, and I feel like she only reaches out to me to tell me how shitty her life is.
    I don't mean to laugh, but home girl needs a reality check. How about you send her an invitation to her own pity party? Jesus. 

    I don't think you need to let the friendship fade, though. She is going through a hard time - it's hard to lose your job and unsuccessful job hunting is emotionally exhausting! And, for many people who put a lot of stock/identity in their profession, it can mean a certain amount of disillusionment and even depression.

    BUT her pride and narrow mindedness is her own worst enemy unfortunately. You have done all a friend can do. You've consoled, you've offered to help with her job hunt, you've given her a place to stay. But you don't have to do more, which IMHO, is enabling the situation.
    *********************************************************************************

    image
  • banana468 said:
     She thinks she shouldn't take a minimum wage job because she has her Master's   Bachelor's.
    This is my aunt. And it's exhausting. In general I try not to be judgmental, and I don't know what it's like to live in her life, but at the same time it's hard to feel sympathy time after time of her refusing to take a lower paying/ANY job because she has a degree. I have many degrees and I work two full-time jobs to make it work. You do what you have to. I get that pride can be a tricky thing, and it can make us act in ways that seem irrational, but at the same time work is work and it pays money. 
    And the pride issue is what makes me frustrated.

    She's too prideful to work a minimum wage job but not too prideful to ask others who DO work to give her money or a place to live? That's bullshit.      

    Has she ever asked you if there are things she could do for you for money or has she only asked for you to spend your money on her? 


    She's never *directly* asked for money, but she's said things like "just so you know, I'm homeless now and here's my PO box if you want to send anything," which H and I kind of took as an ask. She's also stayed with us VERY frequently in the past, using our house as kind of a free hotel when she has to be in this part of the state. I *mostly* didn't mind that (because, hey I got to see my friend!), but thinking about it now annoys me. I did offer to submit her resume for our customer service jobs when we were bonkers hiring around the end of the year (insurance company) this year and last and she said that wasn't something she'd consider. I think that was what really put me off. I know that job would suck, but it's a good company that offers benefits and decent pay, plus the opportunity to work from home after a while. I mean, suck it the hell up. I think you're right that I may need to kind of let things fade away. I don't get anything from the relationship anymore, and I feel like she only reaches out to me to tell me how shitty her life is.

    Can I send you my resume, lol?  I am kidding, but that sounds like it would have been a great opportunity for her (eyeroll).

    Okay, everybody who loves their job and is doing work perfectly suited to their education and experience raise your hand!  ***(crickets)***

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • banana468 said:
     She thinks she shouldn't take a minimum wage job because she has her Master's   Bachelor's.
    This is my aunt. And it's exhausting. In general I try not to be judgmental, and I don't know what it's like to live in her life, but at the same time it's hard to feel sympathy time after time of her refusing to take a lower paying/ANY job because she has a degree. I have many degrees and I work two full-time jobs to make it work. You do what you have to. I get that pride can be a tricky thing, and it can make us act in ways that seem irrational, but at the same time work is work and it pays money. 
    And the pride issue is what makes me frustrated.

    She's too prideful to work a minimum wage job but not too prideful to ask others who DO work to give her money or a place to live? That's bullshit.      

    Has she ever asked you if there are things she could do for you for money or has she only asked for you to spend your money on her? 


    She's never *directly* asked for money, but she's said things like "just so you know, I'm homeless now and here's my PO box if you want to send anything," which H and I kind of took as an ask. She's also stayed with us VERY frequently in the past, using our house as kind of a free hotel when she has to be in this part of the state. I *mostly* didn't mind that (because, hey I got to see my friend!), but thinking about it now annoys me. I did offer to submit her resume for our customer service jobs when we were bonkers hiring around the end of the year (insurance company) this year and last and she said that wasn't something she'd consider. I think that was what really put me off. I know that job would suck, but it's a good company that offers benefits and decent pay, plus the opportunity to work from home after a while. I mean, suck it the hell up. I think you're right that I may need to kind of let things fade away. I don't get anything from the relationship anymore, and I feel like she only reaches out to me to tell me how shitty her life is.
    I don't mean to laugh, but home girl needs a reality check. How about you send her an invitation to her own pity party? Jesus. 

    I don't think you need to let the friendship fade, though. She is going through a hard time - it's hard to lose your job and unsuccessful job hunting is emotionally exhausting! And, for many people who put a lot of stock/identity in their profession, it can mean a certain amount of disillusionment and even depression.

    BUT her pride and narrow mindedness is her own worst enemy unfortunately. You have done all a friend can do. You've consoled, you've offered to help with her job hunt, you've given her a place to stay. But you don't have to do more, which IMHO, is enabling the situation.
    She started the hard time about 18 months ago.  

    I'm not doubting that this sucks however it doesn't sound like she's making a solid search for jobs and it's been over a year.


  • banana468 said:
     She thinks she shouldn't take a minimum wage job because she has her Master's   Bachelor's.
    This is my aunt. And it's exhausting. In general I try not to be judgmental, and I don't know what it's like to live in her life, but at the same time it's hard to feel sympathy time after time of her refusing to take a lower paying/ANY job because she has a degree. I have many degrees and I work two full-time jobs to make it work. You do what you have to. I get that pride can be a tricky thing, and it can make us act in ways that seem irrational, but at the same time work is work and it pays money. 
    And the pride issue is what makes me frustrated.

    She's too prideful to work a minimum wage job but not too prideful to ask others who DO work to give her money or a place to live? That's bullshit.      

    Has she ever asked you if there are things she could do for you for money or has she only asked for you to spend your money on her? 


    She's never *directly* asked for money, but she's said things like "just so you know, I'm homeless now and here's my PO box if you want to send anything," which H and I kind of took as an ask. She's also stayed with us VERY frequently in the past, using our house as kind of a free hotel when she has to be in this part of the state. I *mostly* didn't mind that (because, hey I got to see my friend!), but thinking about it now annoys me. I did offer to submit her resume for our customer service jobs when we were bonkers hiring around the end of the year (insurance company) this year and last and she said that wasn't something she'd consider. I think that was what really put me off. I know that job would suck, but it's a good company that offers benefits and decent pay, plus the opportunity to work from home after a while. I mean, suck it the hell up. I think you're right that I may need to kind of let things fade away. I don't get anything from the relationship anymore, and I feel like she only reaches out to me to tell me how shitty her life is.

    Can I send you my resume, lol?  I am kidding, but that sounds like it would have been a great opportunity for her (eyeroll).

    Okay, everybody who loves their job and is doing work perfectly suited to their education and experience raise your hand!  ***(crickets)***

    *raises hand* :|
  • banana468 said:
     She thinks she shouldn't take a minimum wage job because she has her Master's   Bachelor's.
    This is my aunt. And it's exhausting. In general I try not to be judgmental, and I don't know what it's like to live in her life, but at the same time it's hard to feel sympathy time after time of her refusing to take a lower paying/ANY job because she has a degree. I have many degrees and I work two full-time jobs to make it work. You do what you have to. I get that pride can be a tricky thing, and it can make us act in ways that seem irrational, but at the same time work is work and it pays money. 
    And the pride issue is what makes me frustrated.

    She's too prideful to work a minimum wage job but not too prideful to ask others who DO work to give her money or a place to live? That's bullshit.      

    Has she ever asked you if there are things she could do for you for money or has she only asked for you to spend your money on her? 


    She's never *directly* asked for money, but she's said things like "just so you know, I'm homeless now and here's my PO box if you want to send anything," which H and I kind of took as an ask. She's also stayed with us VERY frequently in the past, using our house as kind of a free hotel when she has to be in this part of the state. I *mostly* didn't mind that (because, hey I got to see my friend!), but thinking about it now annoys me. I did offer to submit her resume for our customer service jobs when we were bonkers hiring around the end of the year (insurance company) this year and last and she said that wasn't something she'd consider. I think that was what really put me off. I know that job would suck, but it's a good company that offers benefits and decent pay, plus the opportunity to work from home after a while. I mean, suck it the hell up. I think you're right that I may need to kind of let things fade away. I don't get anything from the relationship anymore, and I feel like she only reaches out to me to tell me how shitty her life is.

    Can I send you my resume, lol?  I am kidding, but that sounds like it would have been a great opportunity for her (eyeroll).

    Okay, everybody who loves their job and is doing work perfectly suited to their education and experience raise your hand!  ***(crickets)***

    LOL, I LIKE my job, mainly because my hours are flexible and I don't work a full 40 hour week. However, I work as a bookkeeper/payroll clerk and I have a humanities degree, so there's that. 
  • Ro041Ro041 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited February 2018
    *Raises Hand* -- and I graduated law school during the Great Recession.  I watched a bunch of friends take crappy jobs and even a few who were never able to break into the legal field, meanwhile the train passed them by.  

    Edit: word

  • Ro041 said:
    *Raises Hand* -- and I graduated law school during the Great Recession.  I watched a bunch of friends take crappy jobs and even a few who were never able to break into the legal field, meanwhile the trained passed them by.  
    I have friends who became teachers when there was a glut in this province and now don't live in Canada anymore. Now we are going to face a shortage because they've put big restrictions on who can teach. Hopefully I'll have a few friends who will come back. 
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