Wedding Woes

Well, she shouldn't show up to a job that won't pay her.

Dear Prudence,

After six months of searching and working in a restaurant, my sister finally got her first real postcollege job. Two weeks after she started, her boss informed her that their department didn’t actually have the budget to pay her and asked if she would work as an unpaid intern while doing the same things they hired her for. I think she should quit, but the job search was so emotionally draining for her that she is considering staying on and hoping they start paying her. She lives on my couch and was planning to move out after her first paycheck, but now she is going to have to stay longer. What legal recourse might she have? Neither of us have much money, and our parents are dealing with medical issues, so we don’t want to go to them. What should we do?

—Employer Won’t Pay Her


Re: Well, she shouldn't show up to a job that won't pay her.

  • What were the terms of employment? Was there not an offer letter or contract? Take that right to an attorneys office or the Division of Labor in your state.
  • Quit.  Be as nice as you can so as not to burn bridges but I'd be pissed and would move on.

    Sister needs to find a stopgap while she continues her job search but most people who work want to be paid. 
  • Yeah I'm with PPs. I can't believe there's nothing in writing here. And if not, that should have been her first red flag.

    I get that job hunting sucks, but it sounds like this person has little, if any money. She simply can't afford to be an unpaid intern. That should be her answer right there.

    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • Also ditto that if she showed up to work and DID work for any amount of hours she needs to be paid.  


  • Go through the paperwork given upon hire. Sounds fishy, but LW's sister should make sure she didn't agree to this and they're just telling her afterwards.
  • Slightly off topic ...

    How do people feel about unpaid practicums in school? For example - in nursing school we would be on the unit doing all the nursing care that others who had graduated would normally do but get paid to do. 
  • ernursej said:
    Slightly off topic ...

    How do people feel about unpaid practicums in school? For example - in nursing school we would be on the unit doing all the nursing care that others who had graduated would normally do but get paid to do. 
    If they are arranged through school for school credit I am fine with them. 
  • ernursej said:
    Slightly off topic ...

    How do people feel about unpaid practicums in school? For example - in nursing school we would be on the unit doing all the nursing care that others who had graduated would normally do but get paid to do. 
    IMO - it's like paying disabled workers less to do a same job someone else is being paid a living wage for under the guise of "supervision".  Unpaid internships should be a thing of the past.  I still love my mentor while using the time as a college internship.  "By means of you having completed your certification, you are a professional, part of being a professional is you get PAID like one, when YOU don't get paid like one it impacts everyone else in the industry and cheapens us all!"..  I still have the sensation of bite marks on my rear any time I think to go in cheap on an event even when doing so would benefit me professionally!
  • ernursej said:
    Slightly off topic ...

    How do people feel about unpaid practicums in school? For example - in nursing school we would be on the unit doing all the nursing care that others who had graduated would normally do but get paid to do. 
    If they are arranged through school for school credit I am fine with them. 

    Generally speaking, I am fine with that also.  I was a business major and, at my college, one of our requirements for finishing that program was to work on a real world business problem, submitted to the college by actual companies.  It was a team project.

    I found it to be a very valuable experience!  Our project happened to be with a local bank.  We met with their management a number of times.  Our group met many, many times.  It was great practice for all kinds of skills.  Working on a team.  Thinking creatively and "outside the box".  Preparing a professional and well thought-out presentation.

    As such, I didn't mind that this particular business got "free" ideas and a "free" analysis of some of the challenges they were facing.  Because I feel like myself and my team members got back so much more.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • ernursej said:
    Slightly off topic ...

    How do people feel about unpaid practicums in school? For example - in nursing school we would be on the unit doing all the nursing care that others who had graduated would normally do but get paid to do. 
     I’m really torn on the nursing school one. I do know that it’s so much harder as an NP and there are a ton of students out there actually paying their preceptors to take them. And I know a ton of NP students who are being used as free labor instead of actually taught, which is both dangerous and disheartening. Other medical professions aren’t expected to pay their preceptors, and many of them even get paid a small amount. It’s one of the huge problems I have with the way the NP educational system is set up.  



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  • levioosa said:
    ernursej said:
    Slightly off topic ...

    How do people feel about unpaid practicums in school? For example - in nursing school we would be on the unit doing all the nursing care that others who had graduated would normally do but get paid to do. 
     I’m really torn on the nursing school one. I do know that it’s so much harder as an NP and there are a ton of students out there actually paying their preceptors to take them. And I know a ton of NP students who are being used as free labor instead of actually taught, which is both dangerous and disheartening. Other medical professions aren’t expected to pay their preceptors, and many of them even get paid a small amount. It’s one of the huge problems I have with the way the NP educational system is set up.  

    I had great experiences in my practicums but I’m torn about payment. I worked 2 jobs to support myself so I wouldn’t graduate with debt. 4-6 hours of class 5 days a week plus 8 hours of clinical 3-4 days a week ate up a lot of time. Especially for the final practicums which was close to 400 hours and encompassed days, evenings, nights, weekends. 

    i just had a chat with a NP student and was dumbfounded that she was considering offering money to help obtain a placement. 
  • ernursej said:
    Slightly off topic ...

    How do people feel about unpaid practicums in school? For example - in nursing school we would be on the unit doing all the nursing care that others who had graduated would normally do but get paid to do. 
    Nurse here, too! I have mixed feelings on clinicals, etc. I mean, we wouldn't have gotten the hands-on experience any other way, but it did feel like free labor. Once I started working as a nurse I realized that really wasn't the case because it's kind of a lot of work to help the students. 

    The other interesting about things like clinicals or student teaching is that (in the US at least) they tend to be in female-dominated professions. I mean, my business school friends had "internships" but it was more like "hang out in this office and we'll give you some credits."
  • ernursej said:
    Slightly off topic ...

    How do people feel about unpaid practicums in school? For example - in nursing school we would be on the unit doing all the nursing care that others who had graduated would normally do but get paid to do. 
    Nurse here, too! I have mixed feelings on clinicals, etc. I mean, we wouldn't have gotten the hands-on experience any other way, but it did feel like free labor. Once I started working as a nurse I realized that really wasn't the case because it's kind of a lot of work to help the students. 

    The other interesting about things like clinicals or student teaching is that (in the US at least) they tend to be in female-dominated professions. I mean, my business school friends had "internships" but it was more like "hang out in this office and we'll give you some credits."
    Oh, for sure. The other day I had a student and it took him 45 minutes to give two meds and hang a new tube feeding. I was trying to be patient, and it was a good learning experience for him, but I was secretly dying inside. I like teaching, but I can only do it once a week. We have students almost every day and whenever I'm working the instructors request me. Multiple days in a row is too much.  I've also had students talk back to me and act like certain things are beneath them. Not that often, but it's really infuriating when it happens. And one time I had a (male) student tagging along behind me and my other (female) student. He kept talking over me and reminding the other student to do things I had already told her to do. I was so annoyed. 

    I try really hard to explain what I am doing, the disease process, the patient condition, and provide opportunities for the students to do things and ask questions. I remember how hard it was to be a student, and to try to find a nurse who was willing to take me. A lot of times we ended up wandering around and just helping out wherever needed. Or one nurse would be willing to take a student and bam, three of us would tag along. I think it would go a long way to offer incentives to the nursing staff for taking students. I also think for the student's benefit, there should be something akin to being signed off for precepting students. I feel like between the two the quality of student education would improve while attracting more nurses to provide the hands on education. I like teaching, but it literally takes 3-4x longer to do anything, and it really impacts my day. 


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  • GBCKGBCK member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    the whole thing is a catch 22, w/ unpaid work.
    Says the person who is paid less than a living wage because it's 'fun' work (where I dealt w/ bodily fluids 3x in the last 2 days, FWIW).  I depend on our volunteers to have the place run...but I also never volunteered w/ us before I took the job, because, fuck if I would do it for free--it's work worthy of being paid for.  And I hate that we use volunteers.
    But damn if we could keep the place affordable w/o them.
    And...you know what?  today I got to bring in kids from a refugee resettlement program who hadn't ever been, and they were AWESOME and had the best time.  but, it's hard to make that affordable, even w/ grants and scholarship stuff (which is how we managed to get them there)
  • I'm going to have to ask K how they feel about it.  They are in an LPN to RN bridge right now and in the midst of clinicals.  I know they really love the work and getting the hands-on, as well as learning about the different working parts of the clinic/hospital setting (they had to follow the transportation team in one clinic and were fascinated by the set-up and saw how some nurses treated the transport team and swore to be better than that).  I think most of their complaints, when it happened, was that they weren't being allowed to do more.
  • @GBCK do you work at a Children's museum or similar type of place? 
  • GBCKGBCK member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    yup.
    I've been doing hands on sciency stuff for years, and this is my 2nd museum.
    And I love it, but I don't qite make a living wage (i couldn't afford to work here if the Mr. didn't work his job)
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