Wedding Woes

Opening Day!

Morning!  I’m up and at em earlier to drink than I normally am for work. I know all baseball teams have Opening Day, but Detroit’s is practically a State-wide holiday and I haven’t gone in a few years!  We’re meeting at 9am for bloodies and breakfast and then a bus takes us downtown at 10am. It’s supposed to rain and I don’t care!

Tomorrow will be rough, but half of my work is going too so we’re all in the same boat:). 

On the negative side, my brother reached out yesterday so I was a  of a wreck. (Backstory, he’s an addict and we haven’t spoken since before he no called no show my wedding -about 475 days). The message was all about him of course, and the news he really wants me to know but isn’t telling me to trick me into speaking to him. I’m not responding, and I’m angry and sad, but I’m not falling for it. 
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Re: Opening Day!

  • 6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker

    I'm sorry about your brother Kimmi

    I think my kids gave me their stomach thing.  Ugh.  We're going to try to go to the zoo today.  I don't care that it's raining I can't do the people at the science center. 

    We're starting to get sports schedules trickling in and I want to cry.  I had sort of blocked out that Baseball started so soon.  Practices start April 9!

    DH is off tomorrow and it's sort of throwing me off.

  • Bummer @kimmiinthemitten, even when you're prepared/know what how these messages go, it's never easy. Hope you have a great time at opening day!

    It seems like everything is happening today; H and his Dad are going out to see the house again (I teach until 8pm so won't be joining them), my Dad goes to meet the oncologist/surgeon at the cancer hospital, I have a major deadline tomorrow (and no where close to being done), and my biggest class (220 students) has an exam tomorrow. So busy day, I'm distracted, and didn't sleep well. But I did force myself to get my run done this morning so that's a step in the right direction, right? 
  • Sorry about your brother, Kimmi. :(

    I was up and at ‘em to get the kiddo to his root canal.  Poor thing was so nervous. I’m in the waiting room with DefConn. I hope it’s going well. 

    It’s another grey day around here. At least I’m feeling somewhat better. I do see a nap in my future. 

    DH is off tomorrow. I cannot wait because it means I can get out of the house on my own. 

    I’ll post Prudie when I get home. 
  • Hope the kiddo is all right after the root canal @mrsconn23. Maybe I'm a big baby when it comes to pain, but I felt terrible for like two days after mine. Hope he's all right!
  • Oh man, Kimmie, that's rough. I'm sorry.

    I hope Kiddo is okay! You too, 6!

    I had my first bad Walmart pick up experience. We sat outside for 11 minutes before someone came out, a teenage girl and told us there was a problem with the order and she's working on it. She came back out 16 minutes later and told us that our refrigerated stuff (sour cream, eggs, cheese) had been put in the freezer and she didn't want to give it to us. She'd been trying to find a manager to see what she should do and couldn't find one. She was all worried about it and really sweet. Wouldn't accept the tip we tried to give her.

    So we got the rest of the stuff and a manager will call me today to "make it right". I'm interested in what that means, exactly.

    I slept like shit and I have a headache. Hopefully coffee will help..

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  • Ugh I'm so sorry about your brother, kimmi. I can't imagine how tough that would be. 

    I'm wrapping up a conference today. Doing it remotely of course as I can't travel at this point. It's been exhausting, like 8-6/6:30 every day. Woof.

    I'm really checked out at work. I have a LOT to do before I go out on leave (working til I go into labor) and I just can't find the motivation. 
    *********************************************************************************

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  • Is negative motivation a thing? Because if so I think I have it. A have a mile long to-do list and spent the last 20 minutes on Twitter. 
  • I've been at work for almost 2 hours and aside from a couple emails and some personal stuff I haven't done much.  I have a bunch to do since we are closed tomorrow but no motivation 
  • @kimmiinthemitten, I'm sorry about your brother. And @mrsconn23, I hope kiddo does better.

    Go Astros (defending World Series champions)
  • @kimmiinthemitten sorry to hear about your brother :(
    How's time with the nugget?

    @6fsn hopefully it passes and you don't actually get sick :\ 

    @charlotte989875 house vibes and hospital vibes for your dad <3

    @mrsconn23 Dentists are scary by nature, good luck to the kiddo!

    @ShesSoCold yikes! :( hopefully they do something so it doesn't deter you from trying again


    So I lurked here mostly yesterday.

    Bit of update:
    OB wants to try chiro now, so I have a consult next Wednesday with one by my house.
    She said depending on what happens, depends on what we do going forward. I'm already in pain and it's kinda made its way into my pelvic bone. She hasn't even dropped yet, so OB said it'll likely get worse before it gets better.

    There is talk of me stopping work as of beginning of May. We'll see.
    I feel bad because it completely screws with our budget a month earlier than planned, but M is fine because we've already gone through it and we know how it'll be. Just gives us a tad extra time to make any necessary adjustments before our lives change. I just feel guilty.

    BabyKitten is fine. Medical tests came back fine. OB was surprised and impressed that she's already sitting head down.


    I'm in a horrible mood today and no real reason, except my leather jacket zipper split. I think it's fixable but I just wasn't in the mood to do it this morning, so it just put my mood off even more.

    Tonight - groceries; M is going to play poker with the guys; I'm baking a pie for Friday, which I'm glad for because baking calms me. Idk why.

    Friday - Off. recording tutorial on the Crystal Ball Frapp from Starbucks; M & I are moving some stuff from baby's room; going to my mum's for dinner. No idea who will be there because my mum and granny are fighting. {long story, but I'm on my mum's side because my granny is pissy for stupid reasons}

    Saturday -  uncle coming over to help M move big stuff to the basement then we're being kicked out so he can paint. We're likely seeing a movie, M really wants to see "Ready Player One" and I'm not against it, looks really neat. Depending on time, we may wander around Indigo a bit.

    Sunday - dinner with MIL & sFIL family. Depending on times, we may see what can be done for the basement.

    Monday - M's off but I work. I've asked him to do the basement and/or crib if it's not put together.
    I told him I know he's gonna play video games {he just got Far Cry 5} but if he can do one thing, that'd be great.
  • Is negative motivation a thing? Because if so I think I have it. A have a mile long to-do list and spent the last 20 minutes on Twitter. 


    Most definitely!  That's my typical day.  I think a better question is, "Is positive motivation a thing?", lol.

    @kimmiinthemitten, sorry to hear about your brother.  I can imagine it's frustrating when the only time you hear from a loved one is "I need this" or "I want to pull you into my drama".  At least it's Opening Day!  Have a great one.  You know a day is starting off right when it begins with a Bloody Mary, lol.

    @ShesSoCold, sorry to hear it was the first bad Wal-mart pick-up.  After you all were talking it up the other day, I looked into it.  None of the Wal-marts in NOLA offer that.  The closest Wal-mart that does is almost 30 minutes away in the suburbs.  YUP!  That sounds about right, lol.  Probably someday.  Maybe even soon.  But not today, lol.

    Today is a half-day for me and tomorrow is a holiday.  Woo-hoo!  I'm joining the "a lot to do today in a short time and no motivation" club, lol.

    I don't want to jinx myself, but my showing last night went great!  That was the one with the attorney who wants the unit as his city place and also AirBnB it, when he isn't using it.  He spent a lot of time visualizing and talking about the artwork and furniture arrangements he wanted to do for each room.  He said how much he loved it and was wowed by the place, a number of times.  We all verbally agreed to an April 15th move-in date, but no lease signed or holding deposit collected yet.  He has a number of minor, but valid, fixes he wants done and I got the impression he probably doesn't want to sign anything until they're taken care of.  We should be able to knock those out in the next 2-3 days and I'll "push" a little more for things to be formalized, after that. 

    I also got a little of the back story for why he is extra jazzed about securing a place in NOLA.  I already knew he comes down here on the weekend a lot (he lives over an hour away), so there is that.  In addition, apparently he AirBnBs a separate portion of his personal home, but it's hard to tell "distance and relativity" on the AirBnB map.  So he is ALWAYS getting questions like, "Are you near the French Quarter?"  Which is hilarious for us locals, because he is nowhere near New Orleans at all.  Much less a specific area of the city.  But he's seen the demand ;) and my house is less than one mile from the Quarter.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Is negative motivation a thing? Because if so I think I have it. A have a mile long to-do list and spent the last 20 minutes on Twitter. 
    See my confession.  ;) I'm so there with you. 
  • I’m so sorry, @kimmiinthemitten. I know exactly how you feel. 

    Yesterday was the worst. I decided I wasn’t going to go to the clinical site. I went and talked to my class professor and she was astonished and horrified at the story and she said she wouldn’t want me there either. She told me to go talk to the clinical affiliator, who I had already emailed. The clinical affiliator is literally the worst.

    I go up to her office and she tells me that she saw my email, but because the “relationship was consensual” and “twenty years ago” I was overreacting and should still use the clinical site. I asked her if she read the disciplinary document, which was pretty goddamn clear that it was not in any way okay or consensual. Then she tried to tell me I wouldn’t be okay working in the real world because I’m going to work with a lot of people I don’t agree with. I told her it’s apples and oranges, and I shouldn’t have to feel unsafe as a student. Then she told me since I was declining the site I had to sign a declination waiver stating the school had found me an acceptable site but I declined. I refused. And then she told me if I don’t have at least 100 hours in the next three weeks, I will have to repeat the semester.

    No one told me this. I’m so upset. My other clinical potential site that was almost a sure maybe also fell through yesterday. It’s her fucking job to find me an appropriate site. I told her months ago the first one didn’t seem viable and she told me to be patient. And then she tried to gaslight me and tell me it was my fault for not contacting her, when I contacted her several times only to be told to wait. I’m furious and defeated. School has finally broken me. I’m calling places all day today. And I’m going to reach out and see how much it might be to pay a preceptor. It will be at least $2k. This is unconsciousable. And I know she’s going to continue to place patients at that site because she sees nothing wrong with it. If I can’t find a site by Friday or Monday I will have to have a meeting with her, my class professor, and the director of the program to see if any exceptions can be made or if they will hold me back. This fucking sucks. 


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  • @levioosa do you have any other things you can file against her?   A friend who is a clinical psychologist had to file paperwork against her supervisor in her clinical program essentially saying that they found her instructions to be in clear violations of appropriate protocols (how to deal with combative, aggressive suicidal students also means not putting yourself in harms way).  

    I'm so sorry - it sucks when you deal with someone who goes unchecked - hopefully she can be. 
  • Oh no, Levioosa. That's terrible. I'm so sorry.
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  • levioosa said:
    I’m so sorry, @kimmiinthemitten. I know exactly how you feel. 

    Yesterday was the worst. I decided I wasn’t going to go to the clinical site. I went and talked to my class professor and she was astonished and horrified at the story and she said she wouldn’t want me there either. She told me to go talk to the clinical affiliator, who I had already emailed. The clinical affiliator is literally the worst.

    I go up to her office and she tells me that she saw my email, but because the “relationship was consensual” and “twenty years ago” I was overreacting and should still use the clinical site. I asked her if she read the disciplinary document, which was pretty goddamn clear that it was not in any way okay or consensual. Then she tried to tell me I wouldn’t be okay working in the real world because I’m going to work with a lot of people I don’t agree with. I told her it’s apples and oranges, and I shouldn’t have to feel unsafe as a student. Then she told me since I was declining the site I had to sign a declination waiver stating the school had found me an acceptable site but I declined. I refused. And then she told me if I don’t have at least 100 hours in the next three weeks, I will have to repeat the semester.

    No one told me this. I’m so upset. My other clinical potential site that was almost a sure maybe also fell through yesterday. It’s her fucking job to find me an appropriate site. I told her months ago the first one didn’t seem viable and she told me to be patient. And then she tried to gaslight me and tell me it was my fault for not contacting her, when I contacted her several times only to be told to wait. I’m furious and defeated. School has finally broken me. I’m calling places all day today. And I’m going to reach out and see how much it might be to pay a preceptor. It will be at least $2k. This is unconsciousable. And I know she’s going to continue to place patients at that site because she sees nothing wrong with it. If I can’t find a site by Friday or Monday I will have to have a meeting with her, my class professor, and the director of the program to see if any exceptions can be made or if they will hold me back. This fucking sucks. 
    Can you go back to your professor and tell her what the affiliator said to you, and asked you to do? Or ask your professor to attend a meeting with you and the affiliator? 

    As a faculty member if I hear that is what the affiliator was telling students I'd be livid and calling my department chair ASAP. I know you've said before the school hasn't been up front about a number of policies, but this is ridiculous. 

    If I can help in anyway, knowing what I do about university admins, please let me know (even if you want to PM). 
  • @banana468 I can try, but the longer I’ve been at the school the more obvious it is every day that they don’t give two shits about us besides the money we bring. She’s also kind of near the top of our “food chain” so I don’t know how effective it would be. I do know people have complained about her to the dean for years, they’ve walked out of her classes, and they’ve written letters. Fucking crickets. And I have to have her for at least 2 more classes as an actual professor so on top of it I’ve been walking on eggshells since I’ve heard she is petty and vindictive and will tank your grade when she is teaching if she doesn’t like you. 


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  • Thanks @charlotte989875. I might take you up on that if I can’t figure something out. I had a little bit of a breakdown (of course all of this happened during a huge test we had yesterday too) after my test and I told my professor what the affiliator had said. She told me she’d fight for me, but that she didn’t have much power. If we needed to we could set up a meeting with the affiliator and director. I feel like this issue is going to go all the way up to the dean. I also feel like printing out the document, highlighting all of the worst things and asking the affiliator to point out exactly where she thought it was okay. 


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  • @kimmiinthemitten I'm sorry about your brother. 

    @mrsconn23 hope the kiddo's post root canal recovery goes well!

    @charlotte989875 sending your dad good vibes!

    @levioosa that clinical affiliator seriously sucks. I completely agree with @banana468 & @charlotte989875 advice to both file paperwork against her and also go back to the professor - and possibly even higher up the food chain if necessary. I'm sorry.

    Today is super busy and I have a meeting at Noon, which means I will be hitting the cafeteria after lunch rush and when things are picked over. Oh well. I may have to hit up the candy tubes on the floor above me lol. Other than that it has been a super productive day for once. 
  • @levioosa Omg ... that's appalling on what they said.
    Is it too late to find other options, I would hate to see you go back to a place you're not happy with and not comfortable with :( 
  • levioosa said:
    Thanks @charlotte989875. I might take you up on that if I can’t figure something out. I had a little bit of a breakdown (of course all of this happened during a huge test we had yesterday too) after my test and I told my professor what the affiliator had said. She told me she’d fight for me, but that she didn’t have much power. If we needed to we could set up a meeting with the affiliator and director. I feel like this issue is going to go all the way up to the dean. I also feel like printing out the document, highlighting all of the worst things and asking the affiliator to point out exactly where she thought it was okay. 
    I actually think you should do that. I wonder if the Dean knows exactly what kind of things this Doctor did and that they are still sending students there. 
  • Leviosa - That is appalling.  I hope you can get something figured out so they don't make you repeat the semester.  Is there any other schools where you could transfer?

    Kimmi - Sorry about the call from your brother.

    I'm here, work is busy and its my Friday.  That is all!

  • 6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    Holy crap levioosa. That’s awful. I’m sorry. 
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