Feeding Vendors: Yes or No?

mrsjapan · April 2018

So, I am not sure about this one.

The photographer will be there from 3 to 11 and the DJ will be there from 5 to 11, so to me that sounds like they would need dinner at some point. MOB thinks she doesn't need to feed them because she's paying for them to be there. My contracts with them really don't indicate either way so I'm not sure what to do. My venue also hasn't stated if they provide vendor meals or not.

Do I insist to my mom that we need to feed them or do we let them fend for themselves?

STARMOON44 · April 2018

You insist you need to feed them.

ei34 · April 2018

Even venues expect them to be fed! All of the venues my H and I saw mentioned something about vendor meals (they don’t count towards the minimum headcount we have to meet, they’re only 1/3 cost of a regular meal, etc.). They’ll be working, on their feet, through dinner time...id def lean towards them eating dinner.

downtondiva · April 2018

My venue did vendor meals at half the cost of guest meals, with the same entree choices. Speak to your venue and find out what they do. This isn't one of those "they who pay have a say" situations, so don't let the fact that MOB is paying affect how this gets resolved.

MRDCle · April 2018

Of course you feed them. Those are 6 and 8 hour days - does your mom think they're going to brown bag it at the reception? Like PP's said, see if your venue offers a vendor meal (though I've heard from some vendors that these meals are often quite lacking).

southernbelle0915 · April 2018

Ask them both about their break needs. Whether it's "in the contract" or not, they are humans. They need food, water and to use the bathroom. (I can't believe I just had to lay that out.) Then ask them if they need dinner.

I mean, JFC...these people are providing the memories from the most important day of your life (photog) and determining how fun your reception will be (DJ). The least you can do is offer to give them some food.

ETA: I should add that it sounds like YOU get it, but that the MOB is the one who needs to read this thread.

ahoywedding · April 2018

Definitely make sure you feed them! Not all you vendors may take you up on it (our DJ didn't), but you should at least offer. They're usually less expensive than the full meal, but it's important to ask each vendor if they'd like a meal. This is definitely a time to push back against your mom. You've got the right thinking here.

Edit: update since I was reminded who OP is.

LondonLisa · April 2018

eegonosenseidesu said:

So, I am not sure about this one.

The photographer will be there from 3 to 11 and the DJ will be there from 5 to 11, so to me that sounds like they would need dinner at some point. MOB thinks she doesn't need to feed them because she's paying for them to be there. My contracts with them really don't indicate either way so I'm not sure what to do. My venue also hasn't stated if they provide vendor meals or not.

Do I insist to my mom that we need to feed them or do we let them fend for themselves?

MOB? Didn't you get married over a year ago in Japan so you could live with your husband?

banana468 · April 2018

The mother of the NOT EVEN NEWLYWEDS BECAUSE YOU'VE BEEN MARRIED OVER A YEAR thinks that people who are working for 8 or 6 hours don't need to be fed?

Does she think that they get to leave for 30 to 60 minutes in the middle of the event to eat instead?

FFS of course they should be fed.

charlotte989875 · April 2018

Definitely feed them.

ahoywedding · April 2018

Snap, good catch @LondonLisa. OP, you're not planning a wedding.

Lurkers, feed your vendors.

TrixieJess · April 2018

Only don't feed them if you don't mind them heading out for a half hour to an hour in the middle of your celebration.

Holy hell, when I worked weddings we always got fed. I cannot imagine the couple thinking that not feeding their vendors is okay.

MairePoppy · April 2018

If your mom doesn't want to pay for your vendors to eat, you and your husband must step up.

Ask your banquet manager if vendor meals are available. Then ask your dj and photog what they prefer. Most likely they won't want a multi-course meal, since they are working, but their food options should be similar to the guests. No peanut butter sandwiches for the vendors, while the guests are eating surf and turf.

InLoveInQueens · April 2018

LondonLisa said:

eegonosenseidesu said:

So, I am not sure about this one.

The photographer will be there from 3 to 11 and the DJ will be there from 5 to 11, so to me that sounds like they would need dinner at some point. MOB thinks she doesn't need to feed them because she's paying for them to be there. My contracts with them really don't indicate either way so I'm not sure what to do. My venue also hasn't stated if they provide vendor meals or not.

Do I insist to my mom that we need to feed them or do we let them fend for themselves?

MOB? Didn't you get married over a year ago in Japan so you could live with your husband?

Lol, now we know where her entitlement comes from. How tacky.

MesmrEwe · April 2018

When would you like the Photographer and DJ to take their break to run out for a burger? Yes - feed them! Your DJ is going to be there from about 2-3 setting up along with about another 2-3 hours to load out and unload when they get back to their base. The same for the photographer. Yes, talk to your caterer as many do offer a "Vendor meal" option, and yes, they must be fed, and cake/dessert too! (because unlike couples, vendors talk to far more of their target customers/give referrals so it's to their advantage).

MissKittyDanger · April 2018

Yes feed them.
Our DJ said he likely wouldn't have anything, but the offer was still there. We also ensured with venue that he would have a spot by his area that he could sit and enjoy the meal if he chose to.

Photographer was a friend, so she had a seat anyways {we also noted that we didn't need 'meal time photos' so she should sit and enjoy her meal}

short+sassy · April 2018

MissKittyDanger said:

Yes feed them.
Our DJ said he likely wouldn't have anything, but the offer was still there. We also ensured with venue that he would have a spot by his area that he could sit and enjoy the meal if he chose to.

Photographer was a friend, so she had a seat anyways {we also noted that we didn't need 'meal time photos' so she should sit and enjoy her meal}

We only had a photographer, but she said the same thing. We actually never even talked about a meal ahead of time, but the food was buffet style and I knew there would be enough for her and her assistant.

We had them scheduled for (I think) 4 hours. Right as the meal was started, my mom and I realized that...although we'd considered them in the amount ordered...we never talked about it with them. We quickly went over to invite/encourage them to enjoy some. They both said they usually don't eat at the weddings they work because they'd never be able to control their weight, if they did! We all laughed and my mom said that, if they changed their mind, to please help themselves.

MissKittyDanger · April 2018

short+sassy said:

MissKittyDanger said:

Yes feed them.
Our DJ said he likely wouldn't have anything, but the offer was still there. We also ensured with venue that he would have a spot by his area that he could sit and enjoy the meal if he chose to.

Photographer was a friend, so she had a seat anyways {we also noted that we didn't need 'meal time photos' so she should sit and enjoy her meal}

We only had a photographer, but she said the same thing. We actually never even talked about a meal ahead of time, but the food was buffet style and I knew there would be enough for her and her assistant.
We had them scheduled for (I think) 4 hours. Right as the meal was started, my mom and I realized that...although we'd considered them in the amount ordered...we never talked about it with them. We quickly went over to invite/encourage them to enjoy some. They both said they usually don't eat at the weddings they work because they'd never be able to control their weight, if they did! We all laughed and my mom said that, if they changed their mind, to please help themselves.

We did buffet as well lol

We did also follow up with the DJ, encouraging him that if he wanted to eat he was more than welcome to.

jlcece · April 2018

I'd feed them unless you want them to pass out in the middle of your reception

Feeding Vendors: Yes or No?

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