Pre-wedding Parties

Bridal Shower Etiquitte for small family only wedding (gifts?)

I am having a small family only (50 guests, no bridal party) wedding out of state.

My mom and best friend want to host a bridal shower in my home state so I can celebrate with people who I cannot be at the wedding. I love the idea of celebrating with friends and family who cannot attend the wedding, but I feel strange about the gift situation.
I have on the invite that it is a family only wedding out of state, but what should I do about gifts? Should I say "No gifts expected" since most of these people are not invited to the wedding?
Or, should I include registry info? My mom says it is a must to include registry info for a shower and my friends and family will be happy to receive a shower invite, it is a way of including them. (More traditional approach for a larger wedding...)

What is proper nowadays for a bridal shower for a family only/destination wedding?

Re: Bridal Shower Etiquitte for small family only wedding (gifts?)

  • I am having a small family only (50 guests, no bridal party) wedding out of state.

    My mom and best friend want to host a bridal shower in my home state so I can celebrate with people who I cannot be at the wedding. I love the idea of celebrating with friends and family who cannot attend the wedding, but I feel strange about the gift situation.
    I have on the invite that it is a family only wedding out of state, but what should I do about gifts? Should I say "No gifts expected" since most of these people are not invited to the wedding?
    Or, should I include registry info? My mom says it is a must to include registry info for a shower and my friends and family will be happy to receive a shower invite, it is a way of including them. (More traditional approach for a larger wedding...)

    What is proper nowadays for a bridal shower for a family only/destination wedding?


    None of these things are okay! You cannot invite people to a party that's sole purpose is to give you gifts for an event that they're not invited to! Even if this wasn't a shower, you can't invite people to a consolation prize party!

    I get it; I planned to have a small DW also (30 people). Only the people invited to the actual wedding were invited to the shower that was thrown for me. There were no other wedding-related parties with any other people.

    You need to decline this shower completely or insist that only people invited to the wedding itself are invited.

    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • OP, if you post on multiple boards, put "XP" (for cross-post) in the title. You have more responses over on Etiquette. 
    ________________________________


  • Thank you! Yes, I got that request from someone else as well. I will remember for next time!
  • I am having a small family only (50 guests, no bridal party) wedding out of state.

    My mom and best friend want to host a bridal shower in my home state so I can celebrate with people who I cannot be at the wedding. I love the idea of celebrating with friends and family who cannot attend the wedding, but I feel strange about the gift situation.
    I have on the invite that it is a family only wedding out of state, but what should I do about gifts? Should I say "No gifts expected" since most of these people are not invited to the wedding?
    Or, should I include registry info? My mom says it is a must to include registry info for a shower and my friends and family will be happy to receive a shower invite, it is a way of including them. (More traditional approach for a larger wedding...)

    What is proper nowadays for a bridal shower for a family only/destination wedding?
    I answered you on another board not realizing you had cross posted.  However, to the bolded.......it matters not whether "nowadays" or in past years, or in the future......pre-wedding events are only appropriate for invited wedding guests. 
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