Seating Charts are Hard

Jen4948 · August 2018

knottie3a07c9dc00519677 said:

Sigh, it worked out well in spite of our "uncouth" choice. We just trusted that our guests were socially adept or courteous enough to figure this stuff out on their own.

My D and her husband didn't think it was their place to tell people where to sit. They felt it honored their friends more to let them choose. (That is what they meant by "not wanting to assume the burden of others' social interaction. "Assume" in this case is more in the sense of "usurp." It's out of respect, not laziness.)

And everyone did have a place to sit because we intentionally had extra tables. That's how this works. If you're not able to do that, then by all means, assign seats.

If you are afraid of not assigning seats, do it. I only reported our experience because it seems contrary to what so many fear, and to offer an alternative to those who may not think seating charts are right for their event.

In either case, the seating chart or lack thereof won't be the thing you remember years from now.

You're still not getting that the point of assigning tables (not seats) is not about "giving orders" to your guests about where to sit. It is about making sure that everyone starts out with a place to sit and nobody has to walk around to look for an "unsaved" seat -- especially older guests, those with mobility issues and those who don't know anyone else at the wedding.

However "well" it "worked" for you, you're coming off as defensive of a decision that may well not have been appreciated by your guests. The only reason it might seem to have gone "well" for you is that nobody at your wedding was going to tell you if it didn't. Their silence doesn't mean the lack of assigned tables went "well."

ShesSoCold · August 2018

Jen, the horse is dead. My condolences to you.

maine7mob · August 2018

My response was intended to be gracious, not defensive.

Seating Charts are Hard

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