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What to do with mom?

knottie35635879d2fce8c7knottie35635879d2fce8c7 member
First Anniversary
in Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions
I'm getting married in just over three weeks and I'm desperately trying to think of what to with my mom for the processional.

I know moms typically are walked down the aisle before everything starts by one of the groomsmen or whoever, but I want to do something else that is special for my mom. Problem is that I can't think of anything. I think my brain is too fried at this point with all the other details that are still in the works. I know some of you will mention having both her and my dad walk me down, but by mom nixed that, saying that she wants to see just my dad walk me. So instead of that, I want her involved somehow that's more than just being coming down before it all begins. We've always been close and I want her to have a special part somehow.

Anyone have unique ideas?
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Re: What to do with mom?

  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    knottie35635879d2fce8c7 said:
    I'm getting married in just over three weeks and I'm desperately trying to think of what to with my mom for the processional.

    I know moms typically are walked down the aisle before everything starts by one of the groomsmen or whoever, but I want to do something else that is special for my mom. Problem is that I can't think of anything. I think my brain is too fried at this point with all the other details that are still in the works. I know some of you will mention having both her and my dad walk me down, but by mom nixed that, saying that she wants to see just my dad walk me. So instead of that, I want her involved somehow that's more than just being coming down before it all begins. We've always been close and I want her to have a special part somehow.

    Anyone have unique ideas?
    Ask her if/what she wants to do. Maybe she would prefer to walk in the processional or doesn’t want to do anything different. 
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  • ahoyweddingahoywedding member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    1. Ask her what she wants to do; let her do that.
    2. If you're doing a unity candle or any kind of ceremony like that, sometimes the moms light the big candle before the ceremony starts. 
    3. Would she want to walk in the processional and stand at the end of the aisle while you & your dad walk down?
    4. Ask your officiant what they've seen in the past.
    5. Don't sweat it if you can't think of anything special for your mom. Weddings are about the couple.
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  • maine7mobmaine7mob member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Don't worry about this if you can't think of something. My son just walked me to my seat at my daughter's wedding last week. I still felt honored! I mostly just felt emotional. And like your mom, I didn't want to walk D down the aisle, as it was too narrow and would have been awkward.

    But if you want to do something more, one really sweet gesture I've seen is the bride stopping to hug her mom briefly on the way to the altar. It's very moving to watch.
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  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold mod
    First Answer First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its
    Yeah, if you have a brother, he could walk her down (even if he's in the BP, he could just walk back up the side, I've seen it done) or even your dad could walk her down and pop back up the side, if she has a brother, etc. Anyone really, could walk her down.

    Are your FI's parents part of the processional? 
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
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  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing member
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    Being walked down the aisle is special. The MOB is the very last person walked up, and it signals that the wedding is now going to start. And she's typically walked up by the groom, not a groomsman, although it can always be changed if she wants. 
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  • MobKazMobKaz member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited August 2018
    lovesclimbing said:
    Being walked down the aisle is special. The MOB is the very last person walked up, and it signals that the wedding is now going to start. And she's typically walked up by the groom, not a groomsman, although it can always be changed if she wants. 
    Interesting.  I have rarely, if ever, seen that done.

    I have always seen the MOB walked up by a groomsman.  If one of the groomsmen is in the family, he is typically selected for the honor.

    OP, I have been both the MOB and MOG, and will second what others have said.  I honestly did not want to have a bigger role as the day was very emotional.

    If you happen to be having a Catholic ceremony, I found escorting my daughter to the statue of the BVM to be very moving and meaningful.
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    As PPs suggest, ask your mother what she would like. Allow her, for example, to be escorted by someone of her choice and/or give her a corsage.
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  • MesmrEweMesmrEwe member
    First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Typically for the Unity candle the side ones are pre-lit and the center is lit together by the bride and groom, not the other way around...  

    We had an usher (my brother) walk my Mom up...  One other idea is walking in with her parents.  Or, if you've got a sibling not in the WP...  And as PP mentioned - just ask her how she'd like to...  

    Stop overthinking this - she'll get to where she's suppose to sit no matter what even if she sneaks in on the side...
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  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    Huh, all the weddings I've been to that I can recall have the groom walking both the MOG and the MOB down. 
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  • artbyallieartbyallie mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    My husband escorted my mother. His parents walked in together right before her.

    A neat idea that just occurred to me that I've never seen done: you could hand her your bouquet to hold for you when you reach the end of the aisle, instead of having your bridal party hold it. (Assuming you have a bouquet and/or bridal party, neither of which are required, of course.)
    image
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  • ernursejernursej member
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    artbyallie said:
    My husband escorted my mother. His parents walked in together right before her.

    A neat idea that just occurred to me that I've never seen done: you could hand her your bouquet to hold for you when you reach the end of the aisle, instead of having your bridal party hold it. (Assuming you have a bouquet and/or bridal party, neither of which are required, of course.)


    My Mom held my bouquet. I have a great picture of her smiling during the ceremony and holding it, looking down into it.


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  • bubblylovebubblylove member
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    My brother escorted my Mom in. Then she and my MIL lit the unity candle. Worked great.
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  • banana468banana468 member
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    My brother escorted my mom. 

    Mom was MOB - she wore a great dress and had a corsage and sat just behind the BMs.   

    It honestly never occurred to me to give moms roles or jobs.   We had other people do readings and didn't include a unity candle in our ceremony (we knew our religious service would be long and the unity candle was secular - no need to add more time) so the moms were there as moms of those getting married.

    Don't overthink it.   It's a wedding not a play.
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  • CasadenaCasadena member
    First Comment First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper

    My dad escorted my mom up the aisle to be seated.  Then came back down a side aisle while the wedding party started, then walked me down the aisle.

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  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    As the MOB, I had my own special moments with my daughter prior to the wedding. I went shopping with her for her dress, listened to her planning ideas, shopped some more and I attended her shower. I was very happy to watch my daughter walk down the aisle on her very proud Dad's arm. He had been looking forward to that honor for a very long time.

    The mothers could hold your wedding rings and present them at the appropriate time. If you're having a Catholic ceremony, the MOB and MOG could carry the bread and wine to the altar. 

    IMO, it's a mistake to try to cram so many special little moments into those few short  hours. The nicest moments are the little surprises that aren't planned. 






                       
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  • MobKazMobKaz member
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    lovesclimbing said:
    Huh, all the weddings I've been to that I can recall have the groom walking both the MOG and the MOB down. 
    I like the idea.  It sounds a bit touching for the new SIL to walk his new MIL in to the ceremony.  I have just personally never seen it done.

    To be honest, had my (now) SIL walked me in, it may have been a bit too emotional.  DD and SIL met in their senior year of HS.  We grew very close over the years prior to their marriage.  It was easier "leaning" on my son, for sure!  I actually preferred as least "spotlight" as possible.

    If this posts, it will be the first since August 15.  I have been in "waiting for approval" purgatory.  It did not matter which board, which device, or which search engine.  I have sent PM's to @KnotHolly which have fallen on beyond deaf ears!
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  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I have never seen the groom escort the MOB down the aisle either. When I was MOB my sons (they were also groomsmen) walked me down the aisle. In other weddings if a male family didn't escort the MOB/MOG, a groomsman did.
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  • pegasuskatpegasuskat member
    First Comment Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Anniversary
    I have seen the two mothers light the side unity candles, and  I have seen the bride and groom present their mom's a flower as they went out. I have never seen a groom escort the MOB, its always been a son or groomsmen.
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  • MobKazMobKaz member
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    LOL.  @ILoveBeachMusic, if your rapid fire multiple posts are a result of being in "approval hell", then I fear there will soon be a tsunami of posts the likes of which will not soon be forgotten!

    I honestly tried reposting scores of times over the 10 days of Knot approval purgatory!
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  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic member
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    LOL!!! That is exactly what happened. I kept trying to post for days but kept being put in what you so eloquently call Knot approval purgatory!
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  • MobKazMobKaz member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    lovesclimbing said:
    Huh, all the weddings I've been to that I can recall have the groom walking both the MOG and the MOB down. 
    I like the idea.  It sounds a bit touching for the new SIL to walk his new MIL in to the ceremony.  I have just personally never seen it done.

    To be honest, had my (now) SIL walked me in, it may have been a bit too emotional.  DD and SIL met in their senior year of HS.  We grew very close over the years prior to their marriage.  It was easier "leaning" on my son, for sure!  I actually preferred as least "spotlight" as possible.

    If this posts, it will be the first since August 15.  I have been in "waiting for approval" purgatory.  It did not matter which board, which device, or which search engine.  I have sent PM's to @KnotHolly which have fallen on beyond deaf ears!
    Report Reply
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    MobKaz said:
    LOL.  @ILoveBeachMusic, if your rapid fire multiple posts are a result of being in "approval hell", then I fear there will soon be a tsunami of posts the likes of which will not soon be forgotten!

    I honestly tried reposting scores of times over the 10 days of Knot approval purgatory!
    ILoveBeachMusic said:
    LOL!!! That is exactly what happened. I kept trying to post for days but kept being put in what you so eloquently call Knot approval purgatory!
    I've been deleting duplicates as I come across them. I don't visit every board, every day, so if anyone wants their duplicates deleted, just point me in the right direction.
                       
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  • STARMOON44STARMOON44 member
    First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    lovesclimbing said:
    Huh, all the weddings I've been to that I can recall have the groom walking both the MOG and the MOB down. 
    So interesting! I’ve never seen the groom walk anyone down the aisle. Does he just go up and then loop back around?
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  • pegasuskatpegasuskat member
    First Comment Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Anniversary
    I have seen the two mothers light the side unity candles, and  I have seen the bride and groom present their mom's a flower as they exit the church.

    I have never seen a groom walk in the mother of the bride, its always been a brother of the bride or a groomsmen to the weddings I have been to.
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  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    STARMOON44 said:
    lovesclimbing said:
    Huh, all the weddings I've been to that I can recall have the groom walking both the MOG and the MOB down. 
    So interesting! I’ve never seen the groom walk anyone down the aisle. Does he just go up and then loop back around?
    Yup. That's how I've always seen it.
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  • knottieb87521fcf6a57e5bknottieb87521fcf6a57e5b member
    First Comment
    At my fiancé's brothers wedding last month, my fiance just walked his mom to her seat. At our wedding, I'm probably going to have my uncle walk my mom to her seat since my brothers will be walking me down the aisle. Maybe play a special song while people are walking in that your mom loves? 
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  • knottie729d9d0d478ca652knottie729d9d0d478ca652 newb
    First Comment
    In the presence of everyone, thank your mother and say that you love your mother.  :)
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