Y'all sound not MFEO

Re: Y'all sound not MFEO

• ShesSoCold mod

  

  September 2018

  If back cracking is the worst problem this woman has, she's doing pretty god damned good.

  
  

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• mrsconn23 member

  

  September 2018

  He's stopped popping his knuckles around her, for her.  I mean, I have no idea when my hips are going to pop when I get up in the morning.  Some days it's nothing, others it's once, and on others, it's 'poppoppoppoppop'. 
  
  I hate nails on a chalkboard (thinking about it makes my teeth chatter), shoes squeaking on floors and, the sound of knives scraping on a plate, but sometimes you just have to deal with it.  The sound and reaction lasts mere seconds.  I cannot imagine bickering over something like this with my partner unless they were doing it intentionally to piss me off. 

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• banana468 member

  

  September 2018

  Congratulations GF.   You win the award for the easiest life to date.   
  
  If the biggest problem is hearing this when you two wake up in the morning then you probably need separate bedrooms or bigger problems. 

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• ei34 member

  

  September 2018

  This isn’t your problem LW, it’s your girlfriend’s.  My nails on a chalkboard is when people’s teeth touch their forks (either a bite down or a graze).  Which people do often.  When I’m superclose to someone (immediate family, my H like 6 mos in to dating) I’ll mention it, but for casual relationships I don’t bother. It’s my problem, not anyone else’s. 

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• short+sassy member

  

  September 2018 edited September 2018

  I give this guy applause for not cracking his knuckles around her.  Awesome.  He knows it bugs her, it's something he has control over, and he's made an effort to stop.

  But his back cracking after he's moves positions from sitting or lying down after a long period of time, like when he wakes up in the morning, is totally involuntary.  She needs to either get over it, sleep in a different room, or sleep with a white noise machine.  Or break up with him, if it is a deal breaker.  Sounds silly, but if it drives her bonkers enough, it's the best course.

  It would be like telling an SO, "I don't like the way you breathe."  Oh, okay.  Then GTFO because, ya know, I gotta breathe.

  
  

  

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• levioosa member

  

  September 2018

  Big difference between an involuntary action and a voluntary action. He’s done all he can to stop. Kudos to him. Now gf either needs to chill out or realize that this relationship might not work if she can’t even handle an innocuous innocent back stretch. 

  
  

  
  

  

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• mrsconn23 member

  

  September 2018

  I don't like Prudie's response:
  
  My guess is that it’s going to be a lot easier to slightly modify your morning routine than to help your girlfriend “get over” what sounds like a pretty visceral, involuntary antipathy to the sound of joints popping. (Imagine trying to simply will yourself into tolerating the sound of nails on a chalkboard!) On mornings when you wake up before her, get out of bed quickly and brush your teeth or make yourself a cup of coffee and let your joints pop to your heart’s content. You can even get back in bed once you’re done adjusting if you don’t have to be up and about for a while yet. It’s not a perfect solution, of course, and if your back cracks inadvertently as you hop out of bed, I hope your girlfriend can do her part not to hold you personally responsible for something involuntary, especially if you’re doing all you can to minimize the effect it has on her. But it’s certainly a pleasanter way to start the morning than fighting in bed.
  

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• short+sassy member

  

  September 2018 edited September 2018

  mrsconn23 said:

  I don't like Prudie's response:
  
  My guess is that it’s going to be a lot easier to slightly modify your morning routine than to help your girlfriend “get over” what sounds like a pretty visceral, involuntary antipathy to the sound of joints popping. (Imagine trying to simply will yourself into tolerating the sound of nails on a chalkboard!) On mornings when you wake up before her, get out of bed quickly and brush your teeth or make yourself a cup of coffee and let your joints pop to your heart’s content. You can even get back in bed once you’re done adjusting if you don’t have to be up and about for a while yet. It’s not a perfect solution, of course, and if your back cracks inadvertently as you hop out of bed, I hope your girlfriend can do her part not to hold you personally responsible for something involuntary, especially if you’re doing all you can to minimize the effect it has on her. But it’s certainly a pleasanter way to start the morning than fighting in bed.
  

  
  Ugh, Prudie.  He is so off base, so much of the time.  I always like our answers, on WW, better .

  

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• levioosa member

  

  September 2018

  Ah Prudie, you missed the mark. Prudie must also be unfamiliar with aging. The older I get the more joints pop. I stand up, there go my knees. I stretch, that’s my back. Gf is going to be in for a rude awakening when she ages. 

  
  

  
  

  

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• kerbohl member

  

  September 2018

  My dog making licking noises is my nails on a chalkboard. I've learned to live with it. She licks the air in her sleep, and she likes to sleep right beside my bed. It is possible to address your own eccentricities and see it as a chance to grow rather than forcing the world around you to adjust to you ... On an aside, part of my aversion to my dog making licking noises is because I thought she was doing it because of a food allergy (she wasn't), and every time I heard the noise I felt like I was failing her in not being able to figure out her allergy (which she doesn't have). Maybe this GF feels like popping bones is bad and every time she hears it she feels like her BF is doing harm to himself, hence the hatred of the noise? I feel like I might be giving her too much credit though.

  
  

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