Wedding Etiquette Forum

NWR - People stink, literally.

edited February 2019 in Wedding Etiquette Forum
I work with several people who wear too much cologne or perfume. At best, it makes my eyes and the inside of my nose burn. Frequently, it gives me nausea and a headache. Is there anything I can do?

ETA: These are not my direct coworkers, more like clients/customers almost.

Re: NWR - People stink, literally.

  • Do you have an HR dept.?
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • Do you have an HR dept.?
    Yes, they’re not technically our HR, but I’m sure I could still talk to them.
  • I would recommend HR.   Sometimes the start is something like a flyer that is simply output on office etiquette basics we all forget
    -Don't bring in the leftover fish and heat it in the shared microwave
    -Avoid cross contamination for your coworkers with allergies
    -It's flu season.   Please wash hands and/or sanitize if you can't be near a sink.
    -Avoid strong scents for your bath / cologne - A little dab will do ya!
    -You are encouraged to bathe.   A little dab will do ya! 
  • Omg I feel you so hard! I'm currently pregnant and developed that awful super sense of smell. I take public transport everywhere and every day someone who decided perfume or cologne = shower ends up next to me. It's so difficult. 

    I've heard that the more you use the same scent the more you get used to it, so I understand why people smell like they dumped the whole bottle on themselves, but it's just so frustrating. 
  • OK, so I went to my boss and asked her what she thought, and it doesn’t sound like there’s a whole lot we can do HR-wise. She did say she would think about some options while I was on vacation.
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
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    edited February 2019
    OK, so I went to my boss and asked her what she thought, and it doesn’t sound like there’s a whole lot we can do HR-wise. She did say she would think about some options while I was on vacation.

    This is really surprising to me. Not exactly the same, but I had a teammate that well, wasn't on board with daily bathing. And he was a runner. In the summer, it was pretty bad for the people who sat next to him. I noticed it from 5 desks down. 

    Someone on the team did bring it up with our manager, and it was addressed. Of course, I don't know any of the details of that, but I know that there was a conversation and the problem was solved. I honestly think dude didn't know he was bothering other people and just needed the right person to gently bring it to his attention. 

    ETA:But if manager isn't able to help, I'd go the passive aggressive route. *Sneeze *Sneeze *Sneeze  "Did someone just spray heavy air freshner in here?" every time she walks in the room. 
  • OK, so I went to my boss and asked her what she thought, and it doesn’t sound like there’s a whole lot we can do HR-wise. She did say she would think about some options while I was on vacation.

    I'd think what makes it more difficult is, from your description, these aren't employees.  It's clients who work out of your all's office.  We have the same type of set-up where I work. 
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  • I have a coworker who does these garlic and vinegar cleanses or something and it's AWFUL. Like, if she left the room 10 minutes ago and you walk in, you can smell her. She sits in a very small block of 4 cubes with 3 other women. I feel so bad for them. I wonder if anyone complained. I sure would have. We have a lot of unused workspaces down here and I would have asked to be moved. 

    I wonder if that might be an option for you, OWK...? Is there another office or cube or whatever that's further from the stankers that you'd be able to use?
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • I have a coworker who does these garlic and vinegar cleanses or something and it's AWFUL. Like, if she left the room 10 minutes ago and you walk in, you can smell her. She sits in a very small block of 4 cubes with 3 other women. I feel so bad for them. I wonder if anyone complained. I sure would have. We have a lot of unused workspaces down here and I would have asked to be moved. 

    I wonder if that might be an option for you, OWK...? Is there another office or cube or whatever that's further from the stankers that you'd be able to use?
    Alas, no. I’m the receptionist so I have to stay where I am.
  • Omg I feel you so hard! I'm currently pregnant and developed that awful super sense of smell. I take public transport everywhere and every day someone who decided perfume or cologne = shower ends up next to me. It's so difficult. 

    I've heard that the more you use the same scent the more you get used to it, so I understand why people smell like they dumped the whole bottle on themselves, but it's just so frustrating. 

    SITB

    congrats @InLoveInQueens!  How are you feeling?  (Public transit issues aside.  If you’re wondering when people will start to offer you a seat, it was 36 weeks in my experience.  Good ole F train.)  Good luck with dealing with all the scents and smells!
  • @eileenrob Thank you! For some reason I can't quote, stupid website. 16w today, so finally feeling better, also finally buying some new pants :D

    Thankfully I reverse commute on the LIRR so I always get a seat, the only time I have a problem is when there's a concert at Forest Hills stadium in the summer, but by the time they roll around I'll be big enough where maybe people won't be such jerks about crowding around the doors and I'll get a bit of room :P
  • @eileenrob Thank you! For some reason I can't quote, stupid website. 16w today, so finally feeling better, also finally buying some new pants :D

    Thankfully I reverse commute on the LIRR so I always get a seat, the only time I have a problem is when there's a concert at Forest Hills stadium in the summer, but by the time they roll around I'll be big enough where maybe people won't be such jerks about crowding around the doors and I'll get a bit of room :P
    Oh not too bad.  Yes hoping you’ll sit on concert nights! 
    Enjoy the maternity pants- they’re the best  :)
  • eileenrob said:
    Omg I feel you so hard! I'm currently pregnant and developed that awful super sense of smell. I take public transport everywhere and every day someone who decided perfume or cologne = shower ends up next to me. It's so difficult. 

    I've heard that the more you use the same scent the more you get used to it, so I understand why people smell like they dumped the whole bottle on themselves, but it's just so frustrating. 

    SITB

    congrats @InLoveInQueens!  How are you feeling?  (Public transit issues aside.  If you’re wondering when people will start to offer you a seat, it was 36 weeks in my experience.  Good ole F train.)  Good luck with dealing with all the scents and smells!

    STUCK

    So I am not a commuter but the bolded has made me so anxious the few times I've encountered a possibly pregnant woman on the train or bus. We all know that it's never appropriate to ask a woman if she's pregnant, but how do I offer a pregnant-looking woman a seat without assuming she is, and completely offending her if she isn't?!

    I always have so much anxiety over being the asshole who doesn't offer the pregnant woman a seat or the asshole who assumed a woman was pregnant. 
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • Two coworkers and I had a conversation (not on purpose)  in the presence of our office perfume bomb about how we don’t wear perfume into work just when going out socially. Perfume bomb commented that she bathes in perfume and we just got real quiet. It was a 
    Little better after that.
  • eileenrob said:
    Omg I feel you so hard! I'm currently pregnant and developed that awful super sense of smell. I take public transport everywhere and every day someone who decided perfume or cologne = shower ends up next to me. It's so difficult. 

    I've heard that the more you use the same scent the more you get used to it, so I understand why people smell like they dumped the whole bottle on themselves, but it's just so frustrating. 

    SITB

    congrats @InLoveInQueens!  How are you feeling?  (Public transit issues aside.  If you’re wondering when people will start to offer you a seat, it was 36 weeks in my experience.  Good ole F train.)  Good luck with dealing with all the scents and smells!

    STUCK

    So I am not a commuter but the bolded has made me so anxious the few times I've encountered a possibly pregnant woman on the train or bus. We all know that it's never appropriate to ask a woman if she's pregnant, but how do I offer a pregnant-looking woman a seat without assuming she is, and completely offending her if she isn't?!

    I always have so much anxiety over being the asshole who doesn't offer the pregnant woman a seat or the asshole who assumed a woman was pregnant. 
    I didn’t mind not being offered until I was obviously pregnant (which that first pregnancy was 32-33 weeks).  I just..I looked pregnant by then.  If I’d looked the way I looked and I wasn’t pregnant I would’ve understood why I was being offered.  Also you can tell if you glance at faces of people sitting down who looks awkward having the internal debate “is she pregnant?” and who was pretending not to notice.  I understood where the former people were coming from. 
    My first was born in mid-May and Easter was late that year.  During the Easter break I told myself that I had to work up the nerve to just start asking people to sit down.  I never had to bc upon return, for the last two weeks before I gave birth, was when people started offering.  Yay.
  • Omg I feel you so hard! I'm currently pregnant and developed that awful super sense of smell. I take public transport everywhere and every day someone who decided perfume or cologne = shower ends up next to me. It's so difficult. 

    I've heard that the more you use the same scent the more you get used to it, so I understand why people smell like they dumped the whole bottle on themselves, but it's just so frustrating. 
    I totally forgot to say congratulations! So happy for you!
  • When I was vacationing in NYC, I often had people offer me a seat when the subway was full.  Not because I was or looked pregnant, but because I am uncoordinated AF, lol.  Like, holding on to the pole, white-knuckled and with both hands, lol.  I'd also badly injured my knee on the first day of the trip (talk about the worst) and it's possible some people who offered may have observed the major limp I had.

    As an aside, I also had an "oh f**k" moment getting on the plane to go back home.  I see the seats and realize there was no way I could bend my knee enough for the whole flight.  It was able to manage with an aisle seat on the left side of the plane (phew).  Fortunately, the flight wasn't that packed and a kind soul switched seats with me.

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  • Congratulations @InLoveInQueens!  Yes, pregnancy and scent aversion was real.   I loathed the perfume that was marketed to Chiquita because while I was pregnant with Chiquito she didn't understand that it was SO powerful and i wanted to hurl. 
  • @OurWildKingdom @banana468 Thank you! It's exciting but damn, there are so many symptoms that no one tells you about, like the constantly runny nose or the vivid dreams. At least I was pre-warned about the unbelievable sense of smell.

    Another one I was warned of, but not as early as ~6 weeks was the need to pee every hour, I thought it was only from the bladder being compressed, but damn if I haven't been able to sit through a whole show without running to the bathroom at intermission, something I never used to do.
  • OMG - the dreams are vivid and dirty.   

    Also be prepared for leg cramps and nose bleeds and come summer, you may need new supportive sandals up a size.  I have a new love of Birkenstocks. 
  • banana468 said:
    OMG - the dreams are vivid and dirty.   

    Also be prepared for leg cramps and nose bleeds and come summer, you may need new supportive sandals up a size.  I have a new love of Birkenstocks. 
    If you have a membership, the Sam's Club near me has women's Birks for only $40 right now.  At least that is what my H told me.  I haven't made a trip to stock up yet.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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