Wedding Woes

Send a brief email apology and let it go.

Dear Prudence,

I’ve been struggling with my mental health during this pandemic, and in a moment I regret, I snapped at a coworker who kept pushing me for details about my personal life during a Zoom meeting. I said something to the effect of, “Honestly, ‘Tabitha,’ I’m not great, and neither is anyone else. Can we please move on?” I don’t know what came over me (Tabitha and I were friendly colleagues before this), and things have been painfully awkward ever since. We see each other in Zoom meetings during the day but don’t have any one-on-ones, and without the benefit of proximity, I can’t casually drop by her desk and smooth things over. Email feels formal. Scheduling a meeting just between the two of us to discuss our feelings somehow seems both overly aggressive and overly sensitive. We’re both adults, so why am I finding it so difficult to fix this situation? How does one handle difficult conversations when distance is a must?

—Zoom Apology

Re: Send a brief email apology and let it go.

  • Wait... what does she have to smooth over? If all she said what was said I think she did fine?  Am I missing something? Just be casual friendly in email I guess?

  • If she wants to try to mend any fence she may be OK to say, "Hey I was in a bad mood when we talked in that meeting.   I'm having a rough go and I'm sorry for snapping at you." 
  • I feel like the LW is overblowing this a bit.  It doesn't sound like anything that bad.  I'd probably just send a quick chat message (or e-mail, if no chat available), that says something like what @banana468 mentioned. 
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  • At the very most, I'd send a short text message or email apologizing for being short with her, only because LW feels like things have been uncomfortable with Tabitha since this happened. It doesn't sound to me like LW did anything terribly wrong - everyone is at least a little on edge right now, and I think people kind of expect it from other people. 
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  • I am really trying to see what the LW did wrong.  Coworker was being rude and obnoxious, she asked her to knock it off without using any four letter words.  

  • I am really trying to see what the LW did wrong.  Coworker was being rude and obnoxious, she asked her to knock it off without using any four letter words.  
    Abruptness and commenting that "no one is well" in a large meeting may be truthful but is inappropriate. 
  • I am really trying to see what the LW did wrong.  Coworker was being rude and obnoxious, she asked her to knock it off without using any four letter words. 
    I'm almost wondering if the "awkwardness" the LW is feeling, is real or imagined.  Especially since they don't interact with this person much or see them in person at all.  I don't think most people would feel offended by what they said and "Tabitha" may not feel anything is awkward.
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