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Vow renewal 10 years later, please read and help

knottiea0e3f9ac9579b101knottiea0e3f9ac9579b101 newb
in Vow Renewals
So we got married 10/21/2011 without any family, on the back of a tailgate in a park parking lot, didn’t even kiss. We were young and due to the circumstances just wanted something quick. We always said later we would do a vow renewal and actually celebrate our marriage with family and friends. We are celebrating our 10 year anniversary next year and want to start planning now. I don’t want to register sense we have been living with eachother, renting a house, have 3 kids etc... but we never had an actual wedding, I’m not sure how serious to make this. Do I make this into a real wedding sense no one saw us get married and we didn’t even actually say vows, we just signed and high fived? Or am I thinking too big? 
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Re: Vow renewal 10 years later, please read and help

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    MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    knottiea0e3f9ac9579b101 said:
    So we got married 10/21/2011 without any family, on the back of a tailgate in a park parking lot, didn’t even kiss. We were young and due to the circumstances just wanted something quick. We always said later we would do a vow renewal and actually celebrate our marriage with family and friends. We are celebrating our 10 year anniversary next year and want to start planning now. I don’t want to register sense we have been living with eachother, renting a house, have 3 kids etc... but we never had an actual wedding, I’m not sure how serious to make this. Do I make this into a real wedding sense no one saw us get married and we didn’t even actually say vows, we just signed and high fived? Or am I thinking too big? 
    You did have a real wedding. It was real because you are really married. Don't diminish the importance of a low-key elopement because it was missing the bells and whistles. Getting married is the important part. 

    A vow renewal or blow out anniversary party for your 10th anniversary sounds great. It wouldn't be appropriate to register for a vow renewal, but gifts really aren't the point. The point is to celebrate with your loved ones. If you want to say vows, say vows. Otherwise just throw a party. Set a budget and guest list, and then go from there. 
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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    It's okay to have a big party if you want one!  You can have a ceremony and say vows also.

    The only thing you want to be careful of are some wedding "traditions" are not appropriate for a vow renewal (VR)/anniversary (A).  Like @MyNameIsNot mentioned, you all wouldn't register anywhere because a VR/A is generally not a gift giving event.

    For your all's own sake, don't diminish the wedding you all had!  By saying it wasn't "real" or an "actual" wedding.  It may have been very casual, but that was THE day you and your husband joined your lives together.  That is the most important part and the only part that truly matters. 

    No showers or bachelor/ette parties.

    No throwing the garter/bouquet.  Though I'm not a big fan of that for weddings either, lol.

    No first dance or spotlight dances, though it is okay for you and your H to open the dance floor.

    Usually no "wedding party" for lack of a better phrase, though I personally wouldn't side-eye it if you all wanted your kids up there with you or a few close friends/family.
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