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Prudie Day!

charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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in Wedding Woes
Happy Thursday/Prudie Day! The baby is in a phase where he hates sleeping anywhere but being held during the day. It’s super fun.  But he’s awfully cute so I’ll take it. 

MIL is coming over today to help in the afternoon so I can get a nap (& a shower!). It’s her first time while H is working. Anyone else feel differently about their MIL helping out vs their own Mom. With my Mom it’s easy to tell her what I need or what she should do, I feel weirder about it with MIL. Even though my MIL is absolutely wonderful. 
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Re: Prudie Day!

  • mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
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    I remember thinking that DefConn was *never* going to nap anywhere but my arms, @charlotte989875.  Everything is just a phase, but some seem so long.  Take advantage of the MIL reprieve...maybe even take a nap for a few.  

    Congrats @VarunaTT!

    Good luck today @ILoveBeachMusic.  Sending all the vibes for a smooth, successful surgery. 

    Today is my Friday!!  This week has been a week.

    DH had a very scary, bordering on workplace violence situation on Tuesday.  Yesterday was a logistical nightmare due to a couple of issues with miscommunication. 

    We're so not ready for our trip this weekend, but we're staying in FIL's camper.  We are hauling the camper for FIL, so we can pack our stuff and throw it in there.  I have most of the laundry done.  Also if we forget something, someone will have it or we can buy it when we get there.  
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  • missJeanLouisemissJeanLouise member
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    @charlotte989875 I definitely felt different between dealing with my mom and MIL. I don't have much advice but definitely ask for what you need, not what you think MIL wants to do. If she is coming over to help, she should be happy to do whatever.
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  • cupcait927cupcait927 member
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    @charlotte989875 I actually have the opposite issue. My MIL is so easy going and literally begged H and I to tell her how we want things done and goes with it. With my mom, it's harder for me to tell her what to do (but she also never helped in the beginning, just wanted to come over and hold the baby). The nap issue - yeah, DD took maybe 3 naps on her own during the 12 weeks I was home with her. Drove me nuts but now I kind of miss it. H nap-trained her when he was on leave with her after I went back to work.

    @mrsconn23 Have fun camping!

    Looking forward to tomorrow being Friday. 5 days off with H and DD is just what I need. I'm also excited because the weather for Tuesday and Wednesday is now supposed to be in the high 80s, which will be perfect for swimming in the lake. It will be DD's first time in the water!
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  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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    missJeanLouise said:
    @charlotte989875 I definitely felt different between dealing with my mom and MIL. I don't have much advice but definitely ask for what you need, not what you think MIL wants to do. If she is coming over to help, she should be happy to do whatever.
    its definitely all me I’m sure she will be happy to do whatever. It just feels harder to ask her for help than my Mom. But she wants to help and be involved so I need to get over it. 
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  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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    short+sassy said:
    @ILoveBeachMusic, also hoping your surgery goes smoothly today.

    @mrsconn23, I'm sorry to hear your DH had a scary situation at work.  I hope the company has handled it appropriately to keep everyone safe.  Enjoy your all's trip!

    This is also my Friday.  Really, really looking forward to a 4-day weekend!  My H and I are going to when of our favorite restaurants for lunch tomorrow.  Their restaurant month special is a soup or salad with either a Wagyu burger or Monte Cristo sandwich for $20.  It's a 4-star restaurant and just that burger alone is usually $18.  Though I'm opting for the Monte Cristo, because you don't see those very often.  One of the soup options is turtle soup, which is delicious, but often spendy also.  For my Mon. lunch special, I already have my eye on a northern Italian restaurant that has 33 cent martinis.  Their food is really good also.  But, mainly...33 cent martinis, lol.

    I got some really good news yesterday and am so excited!  For 5+ years before the pandemic, my H and I had a p/t gig where we took pics of hotel event boards.  It's so flexible and super good paying for the time spent.  But then, when the Stay At Home order went into effect in my city around late March, that gig disappeared also.  My H and I really weren't expecting it to come back until next year...if it ever did.

    But I got an e-mail yesterday that we're back on, baby!  It's only 3 days instead of the previous 4 days.  And my updated route is only 12 hotels instead of my previous 17 hotels. So it's still a good 40-50% less than what we were previously making.  But that's better than the ZILCH it's been for the last 5 months. 
    Every time you mentioned this job I’m so curious about what the company does with photos of the events! Glad it’s picking back up for you. 
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  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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    mrsconn23 said:
    I remember thinking that DefConn was *never* going to nap anywhere but my arms, @charlotte989875.  Everything is just a phase, but some seem so long.  Take advantage of the MIL reprieve...maybe even take a nap for a few.  

    Congrats @VarunaTT!

    Good luck today @ILoveBeachMusic.  Sending all the vibes for a smooth, successful surgery. 

    Today is my Friday!!  This week has been a week.

    DH had a very scary, bordering on workplace violence situation on Tuesday.  Yesterday was a logistical nightmare due to a couple of issues with miscommunication. 

    We're so not ready for our trip this weekend, but we're staying in FIL's camper.  We are hauling the camper for FIL, so we can pack our stuff and throw it in there.  I have most of the laundry done.  Also if we forget something, someone will have it or we can buy it when we get there.  
    That’s scary! Did HR handle everything well?


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  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom member
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    Charlotte - It was easier for me too with my mom than MIL.  Eventually, I got over it!  She kept wanting to come over all the TIME, like daily.  She also did nothing and I felt the need to entertain her.  I broke down and told H no, she can't come over or at least she needs to bring dinner.  I found my footing with her after that, since the change of dynamic of having DD.  Its easy for me to say this, but your the mom, she is the grandmom.  You know what DS needs more than grandmom.  Tell her how you care for him, but also trust that she will be fine with him.  She was a new mom too once!

    Yoga was lovely last night.  Just around 1 AM though, the fire alarm started going off - off and on.  H didn't even hear it, I did.  It was the one upstairs.  No smoke, but we could feel the heavy humidity.  I grabbed the alarm off the ceiling and went downstairs with H to check on it.  This happened once before to us, but that was at 3 AM.  We've had the windows open, but it was getting humid again with storms coming.  Having the box units in the bedrooms we didn't care too much since it was going to cool down again in another day.  But we ended up turning the central AC back on.  We got the alarm back up and went back to sleep. 

    It is so jarring and unnerving and yet this has happened to us twice now!  And DD slept through the whole thing.  

    Not much today for us.  SSDD.
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  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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    VarunaTT said:
    Whew, chile.  So, met with HR again and 1. I usually don't trust/like HR.  This person has their head on right and is smart AF about observation.  I'm not willing to say I like them, but damn if she didn't make me feel seen as hell and I've never had that experience at work.  Basically she told me something that oh yeah, confirmed my managing paralegal is definitely looking to get me.  And HR had my back about it and I'm very appreciative.  I hate office politics.

    Otherwise, SSDD.  I did have a conversation b/c they are already expanding my role and "trial by another week".  I was clear...yes, I want this and I'm willing to work for it, but I'm starting to invest a lot of time and effort, you're not guaranteeing me the position w/requested pay bump, and you might just be getting a lot of my time and effort for basically free and I'm not here for that.  A good conversation followed and I think it'll be worth it.  I was honest and said, Listen, a lot of lies have been told in this firm before and I'm not inclined to trust this process, so don't mess me about.  I don't think they are, but there's a pretty big culture shift happening and I'm pleased about it.


    Good for you on all of this! That’s not an easy thing to do. 

    Sounds like your office has more than it’s fair share of politics and drama. Glad the HR rep validated what was really happening. 
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  • mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
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    Re: DH's workplace situation, it's super complicated and could have been avoided if past decisions had been upheld.   DH is so pissed about what happened and since he was the highest ranking manager on site and he's the quality and safety manager, he's writing all the reports.  They're going to scathing. 
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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    charlotte989875 said:
    short+sassy said:
    @ILoveBeachMusic, also hoping your surgery goes smoothly today.

    @mrsconn23, I'm sorry to hear your DH had a scary situation at work.  I hope the company has handled it appropriately to keep everyone safe.  Enjoy your all's trip!

    This is also my Friday.  Really, really looking forward to a 4-day weekend!  My H and I are going to when of our favorite restaurants for lunch tomorrow.  Their restaurant month special is a soup or salad with either a Wagyu burger or Monte Cristo sandwich for $20.  It's a 4-star restaurant and just that burger alone is usually $18.  Though I'm opting for the Monte Cristo, because you don't see those very often.  One of the soup options is turtle soup, which is delicious, but often spendy also.  For my Mon. lunch special, I already have my eye on a northern Italian restaurant that has 33 cent martinis.  Their food is really good also.  But, mainly...33 cent martinis, lol.

    I got some really good news yesterday and am so excited!  For 5+ years before the pandemic, my H and I had a p/t gig where we took pics of hotel event boards.  It's so flexible and super good paying for the time spent.  But then, when the Stay At Home order went into effect in my city around late March, that gig disappeared also.  My H and I really weren't expecting it to come back until next year...if it ever did.

    But I got an e-mail yesterday that we're back on, baby!  It's only 3 days instead of the previous 4 days.  And my updated route is only 12 hotels instead of my previous 17 hotels. So it's still a good 40-50% less than what we were previously making.  But that's better than the ZILCH it's been for the last 5 months. 
    Every time you mentioned this job I’m so curious about what the company does with photos of the events! Glad it’s picking back up for you. 
    I don't totally know myself, lol.  I always assumed it was competitors maybe looking for leads on organizations that have conventions.  But over the last year or two, I've learned that while there is some of that, it's mostly the hotels themselves that are the clients.

    In fact, in the e-mail I received, it specifically said that right now they are just doing readings for client hotels.  And that was a mass e-mail sent out to all their reps nationwide.
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  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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    So glad that conversation went well @VarunaTT.  Keeping my fingers crossed!
    i’m jealous of your 4 day weekends ya’ll. I wanted to take Friday off but we usually get out at 2 or 3 anyway and taking Tuesday off isn’t an option.
    ummmm back up @short+sassy , why aren’t we talking more about these .33 cent martini’s?  We should be all over this!!!

    im in the middle of a refi and they’re asking me for a loan forgiveness letter:  apparently it was sent in the mail in 2017.  I may go home over lunch Real quick and go through my files but I don't remember getting this.  But also, I usually rip and toss letters in the mail that look like soliciting. I bet I ripped that one up!  I reached out to the company for another one but there’s a fee involved to get a copy. 

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  • levioosalevioosa member
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    I’m glad to hear your meeting with HR went well @VarunaTT.

    Sending you all the “sleep the bassinet, please” vibes @charlotte989875. 

    Thinking of you and hoping your surgery goes smoothly @ILoveBeachMusic

    It’s my Friday today and also FI’s birthday. I came in early so I can leave early and I’m already ready for the end of the day. Not that today is bad or anything, I just want the work day to be over. I got my bloodwork done this morning and I feel a tad lightheaded but okay. I’m anxious to see where my labs are at. I’m a bad patient and just order my own labs annually now. Oops. I’m excited for this weekend. I’m making a great brunch, we’re BBQing, and hanging out in the pool because it’s going to be 114 out all weekend, which is just...wtf. I need autumn weather stat. 


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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    edited September 2020
    Still Thursday for me. 

    This weekend is a play reading on Saturday over Zoom, and a double birthday party on Saturday (2 Zooms, one after the other with a 30-minute break in between with mostly different guests. 

    My computer is officially dead. It was covered by a warranty on my dad's credit card, so now he has to file the claim. Meanwhile, I have to buy a new computer.

    Wishing @VarunaTT much luck at work, @ILoveBeachMusic mcuh luck with her surgery and @charlotte989875 much luck and sleep with the baby. Soooooo cute!
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  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    CharmedPam said:
    So glad that conversation went well @VarunaTT.  Keeping my fingers crossed!
    i’m jealous of your 4 day weekends ya’ll. I wanted to take Friday off but we usually get out at 2 or 3 anyway and taking Tuesday off isn’t an option.
    ummmm back up @short+sassy , why aren’t we talking more about these .33 cent martini’s?  We should be all over this!!!

    im in the middle of a refi and they’re asking me for a loan forgiveness letter:  apparently it was sent in the mail in 2017.  I may go home over lunch Real quick and go through my files but I don't remember getting this.  But also, I usually rip and toss letters in the mail that look like soliciting. I bet I ripped that one up!  I reached out to the company for another one but there’s a fee involved to get a copy. 
    I had something weird like that also when I first contacted my loan officer for the loan I re-upped a 1-2 weeks ago.

    She said something about that I had requested forbearance, but doesn't see anything else about it.  Sees that I've been paying the loan, was forbearance something I still needed, how were things going, yada, yada.  

    Whaaattt?!?!  I actually had never even asked them about forbearance, much less requested it.  I made that super clear because I didn't want it botching the loan re-up.  She looked again and didn't really give me much explanation, but verified that she was mistaken.
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  • kvrunskvruns member
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    good luck @ILoveBeachMusic
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  • Jstump2Jstump2 member
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    edited September 2020
    charlotte989875 I felt the same way though honestly I didn't really feel like either my mom or MIL "Helped" they just wanted to visit and hold the baby. I swear I will remember to do my best to look around and do what needs done for my girls. Laundry, dishes, etc. I am secretly happy that I have both girls because I feel like the maternal grandma gets more perks lol
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  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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    Jen4948 said:
    Still Thursday for me. 

    This weekend is a play reading on Saturday over Zoom, and a double birthday party on Saturday (2 Zooms, one after the other with a 30-minute break in between with mostly different guests. 

    My computer is officially dead. It was covered by a warranty on my dad's credit card, so now he has to file the claim. Meanwhile, I have to buy a new computer.

    Wishing @VarunaTT much luck at work, @ILoveBeachMusic mcuh luck with her surgery and @charlotte989875 much luck and sleep with the baby. Soooooo cute!
    That really sucks about your computer, especially after it’s been there for so many days! 
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    charlotte989875 said:
    Jen4948 said:
    Still Thursday for me. 

    This weekend is a play reading on Saturday over Zoom, and a double birthday party on Saturday (2 Zooms, one after the other with a 30-minute break in between with mostly different guests. 

    My computer is officially dead. It was covered by a warranty on my dad's credit card, so now he has to file the claim. Meanwhile, I have to buy a new computer.

    Wishing @VarunaTT much luck at work, @ILoveBeachMusic mcuh luck with her surgery and @charlotte989875 much luck and sleep with the baby. Soooooo cute!
    That really sucks about your computer, especially after it’s been there for so many days! 
    Yeah, but I have the hard drive and my dad said he'd help me buy a new computer, so that's nice. I would just need someone to either install the old hard drive in the new computer or copy the contents. A new computer wouldn't really be a bad thing, given that the old one turned out to be no good.
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  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom member
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    ILBM - Good luck with the surgery and recovery!
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  • ei34ei34 member
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    Healthy vibes @ILoveBeachMusic    good for you having that conversation @VarunaTT   yikes sorry about H's workplace craziness @mrsconn23    my MIL (well, she's my FIL's wife, H refers to her that way as opposed to his stepmother bc he was in his 20s when they got married) never offered to help (my ILs really only see the kids a couple times a year) but I can definitely see having a different dynamic with her as opposed to my own mom

    Yay for all the long weekends.  I'm in that boat too- the school only had us come in Mon-Th, and we're off on Monday of course.  Students begin on Tuesday- eeek slash yay. 

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