Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

Including Children

My FI has two kiddos, a boy and girl (6 & 8) that we would like to include in the ceremony. Is anoyone else doing anything similar. I was thinking a necklace for his daughter, but not sure about his son. I want to also make promises to them about loving them, all of us being part of a family....any ideas fabulous knotties?!Laughing

Re: Including Children

  • You WILL be a family when you get married.  A wedding ceremony is about husband and wife, not mommy and daddy.

     I also don't see the need to include children in any kind of "vows".
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • Mister has a daughter and she is just going down the aisle with her own bouquet (I hate the idea of flower girls). I am on the bandwagon with a wedding being about two people loving each other although I can understand some people with two blended families who want to include everyone.

    Plus the kiddo is super shy so I feel it's inappropriate to put her in front of an audience.
  • We are in the same boat.  FI has a son from a previous relationship who will be about 5 when we get married (he will be ring bearer).  I did talk to our pastor about it, and he said that because the mom is still in his sons life, that it would be kind of insulting to her if we had him be too much a part of the ceremony.  He also said that he understood why we wanted to have him be a part of some sort of ceremony that you are talking about, but that the wedding day is our day of celebrating our love and our relationship now and in the future.  He mentioned to take lots of pictures with him and if we wanted to absolutely have him be a part, that maybe when we are announced as husband and wife that he could come up and stand with us for a couple seconds then walk out with us.  Hope that helps a little bit.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Have you asked the kids if they want to be involved?
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    2011 Reading Challenge

    Jessica has read 16 books toward her goal of 150 books.
    hide
    "It's fine to have an open mind, just not so open your brains fall out."
  • The kids do want to be involved, they actually asked me along with their father to marry "them". We will talk with out pastor about it as we get closer to planning the actual day. Thanks for all the opinions!
  • Stage:  I thought the same thing about the kids asking her to marry them to.  It just shows the lack of understanding by children about what a wedding is really about  It goes to our repeated point about the meaning of wedding ceremonies being beyond the comprehension of children.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • Ahh, the others brought up good points. Are they going to live with you full-time? And do they really understand what is happening?


This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards