Dear Prudence,
I have worked at the same place for 20 years. My wife does not work with me, but she knows many of my colleagues. We have more than 700 employees, so we have also had our share of pandemic-related tragedies. One man I worked with died of COVID last year. Recently, another workmate retired and threw a party at a bar. This raised a red flag for me, and my wife and I discussed it for weeks. I knew it was unlikely anyone would be attempting to stay physically distanced from others or wear masks. My wife gives everyone the benefit of the doubt, and she said we must go to the retirement party to honor our friend. My worst fears were borne out. We were the only people wearing masks. Ten minutes in, my wife said that maybe we should remove ours. I said, “No way! We came with masks, so we should leave with masks.” The only “friend” who gave us a kind word was the retiree. One acquaintance came up to me with his hand over his mouth and mocked me. No one else even acknowledged us. We left after about a half hour. After things get back to normal, if they ever do, I don’t want to socialize with these people again. We don’t have many friends, but can we characterize these people as true friends?
—Crowded Out