Wedding Woes

Is it annoying? Yes. A hill to die on...?

Dear Prudence,

My mother-in-law is a preschool teacher and frequently speaks with her family members in a sing-songy “baby talk” voice. This is mildly annoying to me, but she’s otherwise a wonderful person, and I choose not to make a big deal out of it. The problem is her weekly Zooms with her three children, one of whom is my wife. All three children adopt this baby talk voice on the Zooms (or at least what I can hear of the calls from elsewhere in the house). After these calls, my wife then uses the baby talk voice for at least the next few hours before returning to her “regular” voice.

The first few times this happened, I just kind of avoided my wife until the voice went away. But now it happens every week, and it’s driving me up the wall. I’ve tried speaking to my wife directly (she didn’t really understand why I was so bothered), using behavior modification to extinguish the behavior (ignoring my wife until she speaks like an adult again), and just leaving the house (which got inconvenient after a while). I’m at the end of my rope. Is there anything I can do other than just suck it up and live with a baby for a few hours each week? It grates on my nerves to a degree I cannot put into words.

—Sick of Baby Talk

Re: Is it annoying? Yes. A hill to die on...?

  • It's time to play Slayer as soon as those calls end. 
  • i love @missJeanLouise suggestion.  This is ridiculous.  These are grown women and i don't think it's wrong to ask your wife to not speak to you that way.  She and her mom can talk to each other however they want though.  
  • @VarunaTT, hard agree.  I read that and went 'record scratch'.  I was on your side, man and then you went and did that. 
  • You can tell your wife this bothers you (it would bug me), but ignoring her, leaving the house? That’s too much, IMO. 

    You want her to use adult words? You need to do the same. 
  • That's annoying but you're an asshole.

    Proportion, my dude. 
  • The "behavior modification" reminds me of a Big Bang Theory episode.  I forget what behavior Sheldon wanted Penny to change, but he started casually carrying around a few chocolates and would offer her one when she did the behavior he wanted.  Of course, Penny didn't know Sheldon was trying to correct her behavior.  Because it's a sit-com and that's what made the scene funny.

    But, in real life, ignoring one's spouse is not a "behavior modification".  It's petty and cruel.  Their wife might sometimes talk like a baby, but it's the LW who is acting like a 5-year-old.
    Yes, I harkened back to that episode too.  I know one of the times, Penny was in Sheldon's 'spot'.  
  • Yeah - the H is coming off as a jerk in this. 

    I wonder if the answer is the baby talk and the pitch that can grate?  I know there are times that when Chiquita makes annoying voices I tell her that she has to stop.  

    I also wonder if the wife is the type who hears someone speaking in a different accent and then has to mimic it for a while. 


  • i understand your problem
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