Wedding Woes

Summer Tuesday

How's everyone?  Today is my first day of summer vacation, I might be a bit sparse.  My lawyer has some big docs coming to stbxh this week, so that's exciting/nerve wracking.  Hoping everyone is okay, both following scotus/Friday and in general.

Re: Summer Tuesday

  • So guns are the most important right. No abortion. They’re gunning for gay marriage gay sex and birth control. Teachers praying in school is fine. And next term dismantling the administrative state. I’m at a work conference and our expert on DC says they still expect republicans to win big in the midterms. And SCOTUS only getting worse next year. I don’t know how to live. 
  • Oh and states can’t exclude religious institutions from support. 
  • I must live in a goddamn bubble because I truly do not know one person who is happy about anything SCOTUS is doing.  How do these fucking clowns keep winning elections?  


  • mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited June 2022
    It's all about power over.  Old white men are scared of losing their tight-fisted grip and therefore think squeezing the fuck out of everyone, regardless of how they feel or what they want/support.  Roe was the easiest to come for first because it was a well-funded campaign since it was ruled to overturn it.  Now that it's 'settled' they can take the money and energy to move on to other rights.  Hilarious (sarcasm) how Thomas wants to go after everything except Loving.  

    ETA: There's also a bigger faction of people than we think that either isn't engaged, doesn't care, and/or fully support all this shit.  This country celebrates white supremacy, Christian fundamentalism, and the patriarchy.  The things that keep these systems in place are just fine and/or ignored by people. I have empathy for apathetic/unengaged people because the mental load is a lot and actually carving out time and money to fight back via protest, donations, or hell, trying to run yourself is very, very hard.  But we need more people than ever to step up. They've made it very easy to stay siloed in an echo chamber and especially if you're white, be told that you're 'at risk' of losing...something. 

    YAY for movement @ei34.  I hope you're one step closer to getting him the hell out and reclaiming your peace. 

    The kiddo has a job offer for $$ per hour and an opportunity for growth.  I'm super proud of him. I hope he gets his start date soon

    SSDD otherwise.  Still waiting...tick, tick, tick. 
  • I am sleepy. I've got a co-worker who lives quite a commute away and she's having car issues, so she's staying with me.  She wanted to go out after work, so we did for a bit.  It was just too much for me, so I'm feeling it this morning.  Doctor's appointment mid morning and then back to work.  Hopefully we can arrive at a treatment plan that works for me.

    Nothing much else really going on.  I read about "brown noise" music (which makes me laugh because at heart I'm 12) that is supposed to help people with ADHD and other concentration issues.  I've been listening to it and work and it does seem to be helping with my concentration and motivation.  I did some googling about the different colors of noise and brown noise is often described as the sound of a river.  Makes sense then, as I have an entire "water" playlist that I use to help me calm down.  There's no sound I love more in the world than flowing water (like a river or a creek NOT oceans waves, they make me nervous).
  • I've discovered Amazon Prime Video has an app, so I just binged "The Summer I Turned Pretty" {which is a trilogy book I loved} and now they just picked up The O.C so I'm living my best early '00s life because Avril just dropped a remaster anniversary edition of Let Go so I'm also listening to that a lot lol

    Side note we had tiny escapee this morning lol We have a latch on BK's door - we can't close the door because the air flow is awful, so this keeps it open a crack. Also she can yell out of her room and we can hear her if necessary {like if the monitor glitches out and BK is yelling for us - it's happened}

    M & I are downstairs drinking coffee, and we hear BK run from her room to ours and back.
    M goes to the stairs to see what's up and she's on the landing heading down lol
    So we're removing the latch this weekend to see. We may keep it on for bedtime just to ensure she doesn't leave but we'll see.
  • I’m so fucking livid about the court and my company- despite many people telling them it’s a bad idea- is all “this is a sensitive topic so we can’t say anything” even though our insurance policies cover elective abortion and we have employees in states where abortion is now banned. I’m furious. 
  • Re: overturning Roe...highlights:

    1. All the judges that are ordering stays in states with trigger laws
    2. All the prosecutors saying they won't go after women or doctors for performing or seeking abortion care
     
    It would be nice to see medical boards state they won't revoke healthcare licenses for doctors that do provide abortion care and get charged/arrested.  And also, allow those doctors to work even if they're awaiting trial. 

    Also, a downer...did anyone see that AAP came out *yesterday* with their new 'guideline' about how birth givers should try to nurse for at least 2 years vs. the previously recommended 1 year?  There's so much to AYFKM about the decision to release the opinion now and also, read the damn room?!  AAP does this though...they have some great guidelines, but then they pull shit like this.  
  • So now women have to give birth and our doctors want us to be cows? Fuck that and also “birth givers.”
  • I am feeling much less “back to the 1950’s” and more “devolvement into theocracy” from all of these decisions. I’m so angry and sick. 

    I had a meeting with the recruiter yesterday. Verbal offer, still waiting on the salary and written offer. A lot to think about. And it all feels so surreal considering everything happening. 


    image
  • So now women have to give birth and our doctors want us to be cows? Fuck that and also “birth givers.”
    Well, people who don't identify as a woman can still give birth.  
  • mrsconn23 said:
    So now women have to give birth and our doctors want us to be cows? Fuck that and also “birth givers.”
    Well, people who don't identify as a woman can still give birth.  
    Then they can write that out. Eliminating women from the discussion is not the way. 
  • VarunaTTVarunaTT member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited June 2022
    Most articles I've seen use "women and people who can give birth".  I get that you're angry, but gender neutral language in an issue that has to do with reproductive care and uteruses is important.  Plenty of transmen out there that still have all of the same goods a cis-woman does, they can (and do) still get pregnant, sometimes through rape, and this affects them too.
  • VarunaTT said:
    Most articles I've seen use "women and people who can give birth".  I get that you're angry, but gender neutral language in an issue that has to do with reproductive care and uteruses is important.  Plenty of transmen out there that still have all of the same goods a cis-woman does, they can (and do) still get pregnant, sometimes through rape, and this affects them too.
    I have no problem with “women and people who can give birth.”  I have huge problems with eliminating women from the discussion entirely with “birth givers”. It’s not a gender neutral issue and never has been and I will never be ok with pretending otherwise. 
  • mrsconn23 said:
    So now women have to give birth and our doctors want us to be cows? Fuck that and also “birth givers.”
    Well, people who don't identify as a woman can still give birth.  
    Then they can write that out. Eliminating women from the discussion is not the way. 
    I used the term, IDK what exactly was written by the AAP.  But it's not to eliminate women, it was literally short-hand to be inclusive.  Also, does it matter? This isn't an exclusively women's issue.  Anyone with a uterus and the ability to get pregnant is affected by this.

    And hell, I'm not sure it really doesn't touch everyone unless you're a person the lives a solitary life in the wilderness or something and doesn't come across any other people. This has to be shouted out as touching every person who participates in society.  The polling bears it out that messaging has to bring everyone under the tent, especially men because a poll on Friday showed 49% of male respondents don't see this as their issue. 

    I understand as a cis-het woman the twinge when inclusive language (especially that feels clunky) is used that my identity is being eliminated, but I have a fuck ton more privilege than someone who is trans or non-binary and especially being white. I do feel under attack right now and have been very emotional about how this was going to go for awhile.  But we know the target has moved already to decisions that affect people who have much less privilege and that may move even faster than Roe did. 
  • I’ll fight for women to count til the day I die and that means acknowledging we exist in language choices. 
  • The WHO rec is BFing up to 5 years, but that's also because they take poor and under-privileged nations into account and that extending BFing is sometimes the only way kids may survive.  Yes, it's a good thing that this will lead to more protections and nursing access during working hours. 

    But it's just such bad timing between the formula shortage and the Roe decision.  I guess if this came out any time in the last month or two or in the next month or two, it still would be met with a bit of an eyeroll at the very least.  I will say the shortage seems to be getting somewhat better around here.  I've seen more formula, even specialty, on shelves.  I'm sure it's not close to demand, but I hope it's eased a little. 
  • I can see both sides of the AAP timing.  Yes, it can be perceived as yet another way to force women into feeling like there isn't choice.  However without the AAP saying it's recommended for 2 years then employers can try to push back on providing accommodations for pumping as if it's less than a year.  

    The US is often behind in following guidelines for breastfeeding so this should be viewed as a choice women have and what to argue with employers so that women are able to both work and pump.  In the first 6 months it's critical for employees to do that every 2-3 hours and it's so infrequent in the US that women can catch more than a 5 minute break to do this.  By normalizing breastfeeding, providing more locations and breaks for pumping and having the scientific documentation that backs this up, it's a way for women and birth givers to continue to be a vital part of the workforce and to provide that nutrition for their children as well.  


  • @levioosa

    <div style="width:100%;height:0;padding-bottom:100%;position:relative;"><iframe src="https://giphy.com/embed/DTLzZIeBh33S8" width="100%" height="100%" style="position:absolute" frameBorder="0" class="giphy-embed" allowFullScreen></iframe></div><p><a href="https://giphy.com/gifs/despicable-me-pillow-fluffy-DTLzZIeBh33S8">via GIPHY</a></p>

  • Please tell me y'all are listening to the hearngs.  The testimony from this woman is damning.
  • I didn't want to sully my vacation post with my anger.

    All is well, except for women being persecuted and their medical rights being sent almost 50 years back in time.  Louisiana is one of those states with a trigger law.  Because of course we are, smh.  So are our neighboring states.  I've heard the closest place from here to get a legal abortion is Illinois.  Not very close.

    It just hits home that the people most screwed over are the people who can least afford an unwanted pregnancy.  $200 for a flight to Chicago.  A few hundred bucks for 1-2 nights in a hotel.  Plus having to take 3-4 days off from work.  That's impossible for so many people.

    Or what about someone with a high risk pregnancy.  I'd almost want to go live in a different state for the last trimester of my pregnancy.  So I don't die if a medically necessary abortion is needed.  Because...uhhh...pro-life?
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • VarunaTT said:
    Please tell me y'all are listening to the hearngs.  The testimony from this woman is damning.
    I'm not watching, but I'm keeping track of updates.  It's so fucked up. 
  • Also, Epstein's associate/GF/co-conspirator Ghislaine Maxwell got 20 years.  Doesn't seem long enough, but at least it's something.  BUT if, y'know, he'd been properly prosecuted...then...yeah. 
  • All is well, except for women being persecuted and their medical rights being sent almost 50 years back in time.  Louisiana is one of those states with a trigger law.  Because of course we are, smh.  So are our neighboring states.  I've heard the closest place from here to get a legal abortion is Illinois.  Not very close.
    For now, @short+sassy, for now.  A gun swinging pro life candidate won the primary for the republican governor yesterday. Do I think he’ll win? No.  But I’ve been wrong before. 

  • IL politics are wild.  Everyone who's not in the region fucking hates Chicago and its control over politics in the state.  DH's family lives in Peoria and they bitch so hard about state politics all of the time.  It doesn't help that y'all have a history of corrupt governors, LOL.  But  I don't think the alternate candidates are gonna do anything better for the state.  You have to be a wild-ass person to stand out as a Republican candidate in IL.  

    I've heard Pritzker isn't the best, but he's gotta be better than that guy.  I hope that people don't lose their minds and decide they need 'change' and vote in crazypants.  Even though people in my state would love that.  LOL 
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards