this is the code for the render ad
Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Wedding Woes
Wedding Woes
New Discussion

You're asking how to make someone change their speech patterns?

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
in Wedding Woes

Dear Prudence,

A new colleague was recently transferred to my department at work. While she’s great at the job, she has a habit that drives me up a wall. Every time someone shares an anecdote with her, she repeats the final sentence several times in a row and riffs on it. For example, I told her about an obnoxious client, and ended the story by saying, “I’m not a fan of his.” She responded by saying, “Not a fan. Not even a little bit. Not. A. Fan. Would not cheer for his team, even if they paid me.”

I know that this rhetorical technique is probably an attempt at building rapport, but I never know what to say afterwards. It would be one thing if it happened occasionally, but it’s how she ends every. single. conversation. Any advice about how to change up this pattern? I want to connect with her better, but I find myself avoiding casual chats because of her parrot-like tendencies.

— Mimicked in Michigan

Report Reply to Post

Re: You're asking how to make someone change their speech patterns?

  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    This is possibly not something that can't be controlled - so can you just learn to get over it?? 
    Report Reply
  • charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    This is a you problem. Is it weird? Maybe. But it’s not offensive so you need to let it go. 
    Report Reply
  • STARMOON44STARMOON44 member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I would hate this and simply not speak to this person unless necessary. 
    Report Reply
  • mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    There are two people at work (both men) who talk, and talk, and talk. I know going into a conversation with them that it's very possible that I will have to just abruptly be all, "gotta go!" and scurry off. 

    I also try my best to just not talk to them.  LOL  

    LW, if you have to talk to her, keep it as brief as possible. Don't make off-handed comments since she seems to riff on that type of conversation.  Direct questions, yes or no answers, don't talk about other people unless it's, "OH you'll need to reach out to Greg to discuss xyz."  And realize that while she may be a perfectly fine person, you may just not like her and that's OK.  
    Report Reply
  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Get over it. You're going to encounter a lot of extremely annoying people in your career. 
    Report Reply
  • ei34ei34 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    If she's doing it on the final sentence, could you just walk away?  Or if you don't want to look rude, tune her out?  (I know tuning out can be tougher for some...I suggest it only bc many of the students that I work with have similar tics / habits that they can't help, they get easier to ignore over time.)
    Report Reply
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I mean, she's showing that she's paying attention to your story and trying to engage with it. Maybe it's annoying, but it's probably one of the most innocuous things you're going to encounter when you're forced to interact with people you didn't choose all day. 

    I'd take her over the guy who used to sit behind me an loudly clear his throat 87 times an hour. Or anyone who microwaves fish.
    Report Reply
  • kerbohlkerbohl member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    MyNameIsNot said:
    I mean, she's showing that she's paying attention to your story and trying to engage with it. Maybe it's annoying, but it's probably one of the most innocuous things you're going to encounter when you're forced to interact with people you didn't choose all day. 

    I'd take her over the guy who used to sit behind me an loudly clear his throat 87 times an hour. Or anyone who microwaves fish.
    That was me.  I'm sorry, my sense of smell doesn't work well and I legitimately didn't know this was a thing until recently.  I did not know that microwaved fish smelled bad.

    Report Reply
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards