Dear Prudence,
I really enjoy meeting weekly with five friends at a local bar. We always sit outside since the weather is mild where I live. Three of us smoke cigarettes, but only when we meet. None of our wives would be very happy if they knew we smoked. It averages a pack a month. I decided I want to quit, but I have absolutely no willpower to stop at these get-togethers. I have found the only way to quit is to not attend. I have considered asking my friends not to give me a cigarette when I ask for one, but I don’t want to put my lack of willpower on them. Neither of the smokers wants to quit because they don’t smoke very much. My friends are asking why I have not attended the last few get-togethers. I’ve gone a month now without a cigarette and never want to have another. I miss my friends and it’s good for my mental health to get out of the house once a week. I am certain I will cave in and smoke if I see them smoking in front of me. Please give me some advice or instructions on how to build a time machine so I can go back and tell my 17-year-old self, that first cigarette will lead to 38 years of craving.
—Not My Friends’ Responsibility