Dear Prudence,
I’ve always been anxious, high-strung, and intense with major people-pleasing tendencies. I’ve been diagnosed with depression and anxiety and have been told—by a host of doctors—that I’m on the high-functioning end of the spectrum, but not enough to benefit from medical intervention. Despite all this and a decade of therapy and medication, I still feel like I’m barely functional sometimes. I have almost zero patience on a good day and the slightest deviation from routine can utterly derail me. Add to the chaos my 3-year-old twins, and I’m a train wreck.
I could use some advice on patience, deep breathing, or anything else that could be useful when I’m about to blow my stack (which with toddlers seems to happen a lot). I’m in the process of finding a new therapist, and I love my twins more than life and would never do more than raise my voice but they drive me to the absolute edge sometimes. My spouse helps temper them a bit but they’re deployed usually three to five months of the year and my parents are both older, each with their own respective long-term cancer battle so outside help is limited. Is it yoga, deep breathing, or alcohol?
—Help in Harrisburg