Dear Prudence,
I’m a 24-year-old woman. I’ve worked in factory jobs since I was 18, which is where I met my best friend and married him at 19. Looking back, it might have been an impulse decision. After two years of marriage, we split due to his neglect and the way he treated my daughter. We got back together six months later and have been together ever since. We had a surprise child together almost two years ago, even though I didn’t want to have one with him. I was a stay at home mom for maybe a year, and then he got fired so now he stays home and I work. He doesn’t do house duties and is terrible with the children. So after I get off a 12-hour shift, I have to come home and still do everything else. He is supposed to be doing schooling, but he hasn’t shown an effort recently. We get along for the most part, but if anyone else is around, he demeans me and is very rude.
I could probably spend the rest of my life with him, but I fear I would be very unfulfilled. I just want to be alone, but I don’t want to hurt him. Things are mostly fine, but I feel like I’m just settling. He is the only person I have in my life, so I don’t have a babysitter besides him. But it seems like he makes my life harder than it should be. If I leave, I know he will be upset and lash out like he did when we split the first time. Please help me. I feel like I am stuck in my life but I don’t know what to do. I feel like I have no freedom, and I lost who I used to be.
—I’m Stuck