Dear Prudence,
My late husband left instructions for an elaborate funeral, but not enough money to cover the costs. My husband’s sister (who had flown in to help me make final arrangements) is insisting that his wishes be carried out regardless of the expense involved. When I explained how much of a financial hole this would put me in with two kids to raise, she threw a fit and accused me of spitting on her brother’s memory. Now she’s going around telling all the relatives how I’m supposedly too cheap to give my husband a proper funeral. I’m so furious I feel like disinviting her. What’s the proper response?