Hello! (sorry so long)
So I posted this about a month ago but now somethings have changed.
Here is my story in bullet points:
- My one bridesmaid from high school asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding as well. She lives in NJ and I live in PA.
- We only talked through facebook and texts since high school I have only seen her 1-2 times since and I’ve been out since 2005. She asked me to be a bridesmaid so I felt obligated to ask her too- even though I felt like we weren’t that close friends since high school. Several times we were to meet for a fun girls day and she has cancelled the day before or the day of.
- She found a bridesmaid dress that was at Macy’s but I could not find it anywhere close to where I lived. So I sent her $75 check to pick it up for me in my size.
- She got the wrong size- 4 sizes too large. Also the dress was only $55.
- Her dress for my wedding..she already had. I asked my maids for a plain matte black dress.
- I asked her several times to send me a picture of her dress that she had for my wedding and it took her several months of me asking her over and over again. I had to wait to pick up my bridesmaid accessories for the other girls that live close to me because I was waiting for her to respond.
- She was coming to PA to visit family and asked me to have lunch to give me my dress. She cancelled on me an hour before our meeting. I offered to meet her briefly at her grandmother’s house to get the dress- that was a no.
-She then said she would send me the dress. I said okay and asked her to send my $20 back (leftover $ I sent) so I can use that towards the alterations. She said no because she had to ship my dress..but I was more than willing to meet her to save her money when she was in PA?
- I got the dress. No $20 check.
I am just pissed in general. First the dress is 4 sizes too big, then she cancels on me, then she refuses to send my money back. She didn’t have to buy anything for my wedding (not that I care because I am nice in letting my maids choose their dress) but the fact that she is not caring about sending my $20 so I can alter the bridesmaid dress that I have to wear. The alterations are going to cost more than the dress. $20 is not a big deal but it is when you have that many expenses towards a bridesmaid dress! I know most bridesmaid dresses cost about $100 but why wouldn’t she help me out by giving that $20 back?! After all I am a bride too that is paying for my own wedding!
The fact that I felt obligated to even have her in my wedding is making me angry. I don’t really care about the friendship at this point- she obviously doesn’t either after all the canceling. I feel like just an extra body in her wedding.
After I kindly asked for my $20, she has refused to really talk to me at all! I have commented and tried to talk to her on facebook. I asked her for a dress picture of her dress for my wedding and she finally texted it to me but was just like “HERE!” in the text.
Am I wrong? Can say forget the $20 and just tell her I don’t want to be in the wedding or have her at mine? This is stressing me out.
*Both my fiance and mother think I should just tell her goodbye.