Significant Others of Family Members & Bridal Party - Who Gets an Invite?

Re: Significant Others of Family Members & Bridal Party - Who Gets an Invite?

• rsanna member

  

  January 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_significant-others-of-family-members-bridal-party-who-gets-an-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:3fd48320-c13b-4e57-a29b-f201f1841a7aPost:bced6d5f-e078-4362-8b6e-7b21c67c69aa">Significant Others of Family Members & Bridal Party - Who Gets an Invite?</a>:
  [QUOTE]What are the rules on significant other invitations of brothers and sisters and bridal party?  My fiance is the oldest.  I am the youngest.  My brother and sister will both get their plus one as both will be in the wedding party.  He has a sister (24), brother (22), brother (22), and brother (16).  All have boyfriends/girlfriends.  We're doing a destination wedding.  Do I need to extend the plus one to all of them, or can I limit it to his sister?  We're close with her boyfriend, but barely know (or haven't met) the others.  His whole family is in the wedding party. Along those lines, do we need to extend the plus one to everyone in the bridal party? 
  Posted by jenniferschuch[/QUOTE]
  
  I didn't vote because your options don't really cover the right answer.  The sister and two older brothers need to be invited with their SOs. The 16 year old is a little up in the air, because he would techincally be invited with his family. So you don't have to invite him with his girlfriend, but many people use common courtesy and extend plus-one's to their WP members.  Really, talk to your FI about the 16 year old and see what HE thinks. Otherwise the 24 year old and the 22 year olds need to be invited with their SOs, plain and simple.

  
  
  

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• lyndausvi mod

  

  January 2013

  If they all have BF/GF they get an invite. 

  
  

   Although with the 16 year old I would ask your FIL.   A DW means travel, I'm not sure they would want the responsibility of traveling with a minor child.

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  

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• MrsGandthebeag member

  

  January 2013

  I didn't vote either as your choices don't make sense.  Yes you need to invite the SO's of all the siblings except the 16 year old's gf.  I doubt the girl's parent's would want her going to a destination wedding.  

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• AddieCake member

  

  January 2013

  Anybody who has any kind of SO should get a +1. Some argue the 16-year-old doesn't need to have one, but my stance is that he does....usually. However, in this case, I agree with Lynda that since it is a DW, your FILs may not want to be responsible for her. 

  What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14

  

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• banana468 member

  

  January 2013

  If someone is in a relationship then you need to invite the SO.
  
  

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• Chloeagh member

  

  January 2013

  If you invite the 16-year-old's girlfriend, make sure you know of any laws regarding transporting minors across state/country (depending on where the wedding is) lines. When I was little my parents got in trouble more than once because they forgot to get written permission from the other parent before traveling with us.

  

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• STARMOON44 member

  

  January 2013

  In general, I vote anyone in a relationship gets to bring that person, who should be invited by name.  People casually dating, and in my book minors, are not entitled to a plus one.  However, I really think if you are doing a destination wedding, you absolutely should allow everyone to come as a couple if they so chose, and in general think the same courtesy should be extended to your brothers and sisters.  

  
  

  
  

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• freebread03 member

  

  January 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_significant-others-of-family-members-bridal-party-who-gets-an-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3fd48320-c13b-4e57-a29b-f201f1841a7aPost:6cbf447e-7a5f-47e9-becf-d9b2db3ca1c7">Re: Significant Others of Family Members & Bridal Party - Who Gets an Invite?</a>:
  [QUOTE]In general, I vote anyone in a relationship gets to bring that person, who should be invited by name.  People casually dating, and in my book minors, are not entitled to a plus one.  However, I really think if you are doing a destination wedding, you absolutely should allow everyone to come as a couple if they so chose, and in general think the same courtesy should be extended to your brothers and sisters.  
  Posted by STARMOON44[/QUOTE]<div>
  </div><div>But the thing is, who decides if it's casual or not?  The only one who can judge the seriousness of a relationship is the person in it.  If someone considers them their significant other, then they should be invited with that person, regardless if you think it is casual or not.  You're definitely right in that the courtesy of extending pls ones to anyone is proper for a destination wedding (though the whole minor thing is a gray area).
  
  </div>

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• STARMOON44 member

  

  January 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_significant-others-of-family-members-bridal-party-who-gets-an-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3fd48320-c13b-4e57-a29b-f201f1841a7aPost:ef46ca7c-9d4e-4995-82f5-9e77e960732a">Re: Significant Others of Family Members & Bridal Party - Who Gets an Invite?</a>:
  [QUOTE] If someone considers them their significant other, then they should be invited with that person, regardless if you think it is casual or not.  
  Posted by freebread03[/QUOTE]
  
  <div>Completely agree- I was referring to people who consider themselves to be casually dating.</div>

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