Kids at Weddings

Re: Kids at Weddings

• lauraf1202 member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  No, I think if you allow one cousin to bring his/her son then you open the floodgates for yourself to be steamrollered into allowing a lot of other kids.  Or upsetting others who didn't bring their children.  You made a decision due to budget, I think you should stick to it. 
  
  I think I would say "I'm sorry, Cousin, but due to budget restraints we're unable to have the kids there.   We'll definitely miss him!"  Or something like that. 
  

  

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• LisaC0617

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  I'm not inviting kids either, and am waiting for these kinds of issues.  I just plan to let them know, since the ceremony is at a later hour, we are having an adults only reception. I'm doing relatively the same thing you are, with addressing the invites to only those invted (although I had a bridal shower last weekend that made it clear a couple people did not understand that) and I plan just to be honest with people who bring it up, or write their kids' names in. 

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• kelleyku05 member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  I'm limiting kids at my wedding, it sounds kind of rude....but I'm only having a few from OOT that I know would never leave their kids for the weekend while they flew out of state.  I did the same things with invites and I have spread the word that there will only be 3 or 4 children there and so far everyone has been okay with it.  I agree with PP, just explain the situation and hope they can find a sitter!

  
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• dazed2confused

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  we had no kids at the wedding.  My cousin asked me, and i said no we aren't having anyone under 11 (one of my first cousins is 11).  Then joked that wouldn't she enjoy a night without them anyways.

  
  

  You got to stick firm.  No bending, that only leads to trouble.

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  I am struggling with this issue as well. My budget can only afford so many people. I am inviting some kids but not all. If I were to invite everyone and their children my guest list could easily be 200 and I only want 125 people max. I am thinking of having a very specific number on the RSVP's so that my guests are not confused. It will say something like "we are reserving 2 seats in your honor..." so that the family knows exactly how many people can come. I don't know how this is going to work or if I'll offend anyone but I really hope they understand. 

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_missouri-kansas-city_kids-weddings?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:82Discussion:c1847196-24c4-439b-87d8-9074cdc0f526Post:95671e45-f111-4b21-b746-e61a1ece44f3">Re: Kids at Weddings</a>:
  [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Kids at Weddings : Are you prepared for the possibility that the 2 seats may end up being filled by someone other than the invited guest?  I've heard of people doing that and instead of Joe and Mary Smith attending, Mary brings her BFF/kid/cousin, etc instead of Joe. We had a place for their names, a box for decline, and a line for # attending...anyone that wrote more than 2 would have been called. 
  Posted by jcbsjr[/QUOTE]<div>
  </div><div>No, you bring up a really good point though! I haven't even started to word the invitations yet so I'm still working out the kinks. I just want the response cards to be VERY clear on who is invited to attend. I need to try and find a  good example of one online so I can borrow from it. 
  
  </div>

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• nikkifee member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  Thanks everyone for the great advice! I emailed them back today and let them know we weren't having kids at the wedding. 

  

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• aegrish member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_missouri-kansas-city_kids-weddings?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:82Discussion:c1847196-24c4-439b-87d8-9074cdc0f526Post:60d6475b-6083-4e34-ad2e-eea32a444ac9">Re: Kids at Weddings</a>:
  [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Kids at Weddings : I've also seen this: ______________  ___ will attend   ___ declines ______________  ___ will attend   ___ declines And then you write in the name of each invited guest.  For singles (without plus 1), I guess you would order some cards with only one line?  Even then, <strong>I've heard of people crossing out 'Joe' and writing in whomever.  But then at least you'd know and could decide if you wanted to call & inform them that the write-in isn't invited.  </strong>My only concern with the above, is that people may just bring their 'extras' and you wouldn't know until they were there.  If you have a line with # attending, then if they write '6' or whatever, you can call them and let them know otherwise.  People are just ridiculous about rsvp's!! GL!
  Posted by jcbsjr[/QUOTE]
  
  Really, if people can't bring their SO and wanted to bring someone along you'd tell them 'no sorry'.  Weren't you planning on 2 people anyways? What's the difference? I think that's super rude for someone to write in a guests name, but I think it's equally as rude to call them up and pretty much tell them they have to come alone if their SO can't come at all. 
  
  And if you are completely excluding kids from your reception that's your choice, but keep in mind some guests may decline completely so they don't have to get a sitter or leave their kids...I'd be the black sheep here and just let her bring the kid.  Then again we're inviting all kids to our AHR (and even to our DW) so I come from a different perspective...

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• nikkifee member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  Aegrish, I do understand that some people may not come to the wedding if they can't bring their kids, but the reason we're doing an adults only reception is because one, we cannot afford to pay for meals for the amount of children that would then come (we have a REALLY small budget), and second, because of the size. The chapel we're getting married in only holds 70 people, so in order to allow kids, that means we'd have to uninvite someone else. So, the only way the aunts, uncles, and cousins could even be invited and fit, would be to not allow them to bring their children. 

  

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• Tracie65

  

  June 2011 edited December 2011

  Me and my fiance are in our 40's and our children are pretty much grown.  The youngest is 17 years old.  I'm not inviting anyone under the age of 16 and those will probably be put to work.  I havent gotten to the invitation part yet but when I speak of the wedding, reception, etc.  I say NO KIDS ALLOWED! when I am asked of my plans for everything.  I may get a weird look but I say if you want kids at your wedding then by all means go ahead get married and have kids at YOUR wedding..

  So in love with Tracy

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